Fallen Souls
by Cassandra
Summary: A now evil Kagome will stop at nothing to reunite the shards of the Shikon no Tama and take down everyone in her way.
1. See Me

**_Afraid, _**

**_I don't know if we're heading for a fall  
You jump into the front to say you're a part of it all  
Feed from their eyes, _**

**_Dream you're alive, _**

**_And feel…feel  
The beast flies tonight, _**

**_And the world he describes  
Suffer_**

**_Suffer…_**

                         **_- Fallen Souls - Ours_****_  
  
_**

Fallen Souls 

See me… 

            He moved gracefully, elegantly. Wildly. Pure muscle, agility and anger. Silver hair blew across his face, amber eyes blazing. He was inhumanly fast, and after everything, painfully beautiful. So painfully beautiful.

            _See me…_

            A clawed hand tore through the air, separating head from body, blood spraying across the wide expanse of grass. The sun was setting, throwing copper over the glistening fluid, and the hanyou was but a shadow, lunging through the air, that long hair flowing as if caught on an eternal wind. He always seemed to take so long in the air, almost creating the illusion that he flew. He landed in a crouch, legs tucking under his lean frame, hands bent in toward his chest. And above him, the youkai fell apart, head flying in one direction, body slipping limply to the ground.

            _Please see me…_

            She could barely move her limbs, her breathing heavy, ragged. Everything was heavy, so unbearably heavy, and the simple action of blinking became harder and harder. She wanted to close her eyes, for a moment, a small moment, to rest them. But she struggled to keep them open, lips parted around her gasps, and slowly, painfully, she reached a hand out across the grass toward the man. Her vision swam and she didn't know if it was because of the pain in her body, or the pain in her heart.

            _Please…only me…_

            The head of the youkai hit the ground and rolled, coming to a stop several feet away. Out of the corner of her eye she saw it, realized that it had rolled back onto its cheekbone and the eyes gazed at her, wide-eyed. Maniacally gleeful eyes. She shifted her gaze over toward the miserable creature, fingers still reaching for the hanyou.

            The silver-haired demon turned his head slowly, also looking toward her.

            But she could only stare at the severed head of the youkai, stare as something flashed in the depths of his evil eyes. For the one moment she could see into its malevolence, all the lives it had taken, all the pain it had wrought. And the seductiveness of it still hung in the air, the pure emotion. The need. She couldn't pull her blurry gaze away and she couldn't focus on anything but it, as it beckoned with a wicked smile.

            _It's always her…why? Why is it…_

            In a blurred movement, the silver-haired man was beside her, clawed hands thick with blood reaching toward her. And in that moment, the flashing light in the depths of the youkai's eyes came at her, streaking forth and slamming into her as if it had been a dead on attack. Her eyes widened as everything turned white and she felt herself, ripping, tearing into two. Two sides of one soul, unbalancing, falling apart. But there were four parts to the soul. Four. Valor, Miracle, Harmony and Love. Love…

            _Why is it…_

            The silver-haired man reached out for a split second, one long-clawed hand taking hold of her grasping one, and he squeezed it, tightly. Tightly enough to nearly break a bone, crush it in his hand had he desired. But instead he knelt beside her and took hold of her entirely, pulling her roughly into his arms, burying his face into her neck. His breath was hot against her skin and he trembled in her weak embrace, that soft silver hair falling across his shoulder and her cheek.

            "Kagome…"

            _Why is it always…her? _

            And why did it always hurt? Over his shoulder she could only stare at nothingness, gaze clouding over. It would always be her, no matter whose name he whispered or how he smiled at her. And inside she, herself, felt the sudden need to smile. To smile sinfully.

Um, yeah, new story because I sorta can't seem to get a footing with the other one I left open (The Lord of the Rings one). That and Aes is having trouble keeping up with the other fic along with her own so I'm starting something new, based on a new obsession. Hope you all like. 

Also, because of the NC-17 thing, I also have this posted on my website (just go to my profile to find the site) and most likely this version for Fanfiction.net will be a more…innocent version than the one I'll be posting over there. I also have my other NC-17 fics there, slowly being put up…

- Cass


	2. Uso to Akui

_Uso to Akui:_

            "Kagome-sama…is not well?" Miroku murmured in a question and he lifted his dark eyes upward to where Inuyasha sat on a tree branch. The night was quiet but warm and there had been no need for a fire. The group sat in darkness, the monk on his rear resting from the long journey they had taken that day. Beside him lay Shippo, the small fox demon sleeping peacefully. 

            The hanyou sat with his back pressed against the bark of the tree, staring out blindly into the darkness. No, Kagome-sama was not well. Kagome had not been well since the encounter with the youkai that had nearly killed her. He exhaled inaudibly, sniffing the air almost absentmindedly. He did that a lot these days, sniffing and searching the night, always prepared for a fight. So long as the Shikon no Tama was on any of their person it would be a necessity. 

            Below, the monk made a small, derisive sound and settled down to sleep, obviously put off that the hanyou had not answered his question. It was fine with him. He didn't converse much with the monk although he did trust him in battle. 

            Sango had returned to her village several days earlier. To check up on things, no doubt. One less person to worry about. 

            "Perhaps you should go look for her if you're going to be worrying the way you are," Miroku mumbled under his breath. "Or perhaps you'd rather I go? I think she's bathing-"

            "Shut up, bozu," he growled finally, and he cast a wrathful look at the monk who was lying on his back, hands propping his head up comfortably, a sly smile on his face. Standing up with a flourish he shook out his clothes, the long sleeves of the haori billowing about his frame. He would not play into his little games, especially not tonight. 

            He was tired. Quite literally, he was drained of everything. His emotions had wrung him dry and he felt as if the slightest breeze could rip him apart. With another inward sigh he took a step and then leapt, flying through the air. The world was good to him in that, allowing him to alight on another sturdy tree branch and from there he dived once more, sailing forth.

            Miroku's smile slowly faded away as he watch him vanish into the shadows of the night. It was better that the hanyou be with Kagome at the moment. The girl from the other world had not been herself since the encounter and what she needed was a friend above all.

            Although he wouldn't have minded a good feel in the midst of comforting her.

            Inuyasha landed silently upon a branch, hesitating before the river. He had heard small sounds apart from the rushing stream, small splashes and soft whispers. But Kagome had come to bathe alone. His heart quickened a bit as he looked about, searching for her figure.

            She hid in the stream behind a large pile of stones, her frame glistening in the moonlight that touched down around her. 

            He stared for a moment, a frown on his face. No doubt he would be assaulted with an "Osuwari!" the moment she caught him peeping but at the moment he didn't care.

            "Uso. Uso," she whispered and he caught her pained rambling even across the roar of the stream. Her hands lifted to her ears and she bent her head, shaking it as if to rid herself of something. A thought. "Uso…uso…"

            He cocked his head in confusion, unsure whether to bring himself closer. The Shikon no Tama hung around her neck, resting upon her chest and it shone in the moonlight momentarily, gleaming brilliantly. And a moment later she threw her back her head, clutching her hair to her neck and shrieked, _"Uso!"_

            The sound startled him momentarily, bringing him up stiffly and as she screamed it again he leapt, his dive bringing him to a crouched landing behind her, on top of the tallest stone. With an anger borne from fear he reached down and swiped at her wrist, taking hold of it tightly and forcing her around. "Kagome!"

            She whirled, staggering, and fell against the stone, looking up at him with wide eyes. And for a moment it almost seemed as if she didn't recognize him, didn't trust him. He stared down at her, eyebrows pulled low over his amber eyes and they gazed at each other silently, all sound lost to them both.

            And then, it all happened in slow motion. Inuyasha knew she would not ever let him live it down. Dropping her head, she stared at her nude form, only barely covered by the stone she was pressed up against. His senses warned him that it would have been the perfect opportunity to flee, at least until he was out of earshot. His eyes picked up the scarlet blush that shot across her cheeks and had he had another moment he would have gladly slapped himself across the forehead.

            **_"Osuwari!"_** she yelled.

            His entire body crashed to the stone, chin knocking against the edge, and he winced as stars exploded before his eyes. She always did that. Damn it, he should have been used to it but she always managed to find a new spot for him to crash down _unto_.

            "You _pervert!_ What the _hell_ do you think you're doing? Can't I bathe in peace-"

            "Shut up!" he shouted at her as he managed to lift his head. A moment later he was back on his feet, still clutching her wrist. "What the hell is the matter with you?" he growled at her, shaking her wrist, angrily, _purposefully_, staring her in her eyes. "You had me worried half to death, screaming your head off like that! What the hell is going on?"

            She blinked at him, mouth forming an 'o' in surprise. "Eh?" she questioned. And a moment later she waved her free hand at him, her face breaking out into a wide smile, eyes sliding shut. "Ah, gomen, gomen. I didn't think anyone was around-"

            He quirked an eyebrow, mouth clamping shut as she continued to wave cheerfully. 

            "I was practicing…for a play, at school, you see…" she went on and he stared at her as she spoke, catching onto the way she kept her eyes closed as she spoke, the way she was still trying to wrench her wrist from his grip. "And I thought everyone was asleep. And because my part is such a…a _forceful_ one…"

            _You're lying._

            "I didn't think you would be awake and I didn't think anyone would hear me. Gomen." A moment later she ducked down even further behind the stone, looking about quickly. "Eh, Miroku-sama? Doko-"

            "Asleep," Inuyasha said dully, staring at her. And the expression on his face was one of sadness, almost. She returned her eyes back to his face at his tone, but the expression on his face closed over and without another word he released her wrist, rising to his full height. She stared at him, her words dying away as he merely let his gaze roam across her face and then he turned away, silver hair blowing behind him.

            "Inuyasha-" she whispered.

            He leapt off the stone and landed on the bank of the river, folding his arms across his chest and facing away from her. "Get dressed. I'll wait for you."

            She didn't say anything for a moment and he kept his gaze fixed on the darkness of the woods before him, standing stiffly but firmly.

            "You…really don't have to-"

            "Just do it," he ordered, tossing the growl at her over his shoulder.

            She said nothing else and he listened to her as she pulled away from the stream, slowly padding over to her heap of clothes on the other side of the stone, lying on dry grass. He managed to shut away the noise as she dressed once more, managed to not try to picture what she was slipping on now, or if she needed help. It seemed to take her forever but he was sure it was just him. He lifted his eyes up toward the sky and swallowed inaudibly. His time would be soon. Another turn at humanity.

            She came up behind him and he was suddenly aware of her, all of her. His skin pricked up as if sensing magic and he pulled back a step as she came to stand beside him, long hair hanging damply. She _was_ magic, he realized, meeting her eyes. All of her was magical. She smiled at him faintly and he looked down, suddenly feeling her hand brush his. A slender, pale hand. His eyes focused on that before slowly running up along the arm, following her limb to her uniform and catching on the Shikon no Tama around her neck, resting close to her breast. His gaze flew to her face and the smile was still there but it was different somehow. The same smile. A different expression. 

            "Are you…afraid of me?" she asked quietly.

            His head shot up, eyes widening as he frowned. "No, of course not. I would never be afraid of you."

            She seemed to measure him silently.

            "Just as you would never have a reason to be afraid of me," he finished, feeling as if he spoke through a veil. Uncertain. "Why would you ask me a question like that?"

            She tilted her head, shrugging faintly, and that gesture also seemed off. He glared at her, wanting to see passed the smile to what she thought, what was running through her head at that very moment. Instead, she turned her face away, her hand leaving his without warmth, and she went to take a step back toward where they had left the others camped.

            Inuyasha took hold of her wrist once more, causing her to stumble backward in surprise and he held her wrist beside his face for a moment, honey-hued eyes cold. His claws dug into her skin slightly and she grimaced, coming toward him a step.

            "Inuyasha_, itai-"_ she whispered, clenching her hand into a fist as he merely gazed at her. 

            The hanyou studied her expression, calculating for a moment. And then, slowly, he brought her wrist toward his face, sniffing her skin almost imperceptibly. Her eyes glazed over slightly as he looked into them, breathing faintly against her arm. She smelled like herself, that wonderfully soft scent that was all her own, underneath the fragranced soaps and sprays she used. She seemed limp as he gazed at her and after a moment he lowered her wrist away, lifting his other hand to it, to massage away the small pricks his claws had left in her flesh. She swallowed as he did so, her eyes dropping to stare at their hands together.

            "Gomen," he whispered, also looking at their joined hands. His thumb grazed the back of her palm momentarily before finally releasing her entirely. And then he swept passed her, red haori billowing around his lean frame.

            Kagome stared off after him for a slight instant and as he glanced over his shoulder she went to catch up, walking with him back toward the group.

Thanks for the reviews, everyone! It's kinda cool being able to do this again and especially with a different group of people. I know that the ppl reading an InuYasha fic are different from those reading a CCS or Final Fantasy one so it's cool to me that I can meet a different set of people. I'm trying to be faithful to not only the actual storyline of the anime but also the actual form of anime so I'm trying to write it as if you guys were watching an InuYasha episode. Does that make sense? Anyways I finished up to chapter four of this but I've only seen up to Episode 27 so Sango hasn't been in there too long but I'm going to see if I can pull it off.

Also, I am still updating the webpage but it's slowly coming together… ;)

-Cass


	3. Omoide

_Omoide:_

            Miroku sighed, deep in thought. Beside him, Shippo sniffed the air, fox tail twitching. "Something smells really good…" the kitsune murmured, eyes closing as he sniffed a bit more. "I love Kagome's cooking…"

            Kagome sat before a large pot of boiling water and she glanced over toward the child, smiling cheerfully. "You like rabbit with your ramen, ne, Shippo-chan?" she asked him.

            "Um, um!"

            Inuyasha wound his way around a large tree to their left, also seemingly lost in thought. Kagome glanced over for a small moment, frowning delicately, before turning back to the pot of stew.

            And Miroku sighed some more.

            "Oy, bozu," the hanyou growled, casting a glance over. "What are you thinking?"

            The monk didn't open his eyes, which had been closed since they had sat down in the small clearing for dinner. "I think…" he said gravelly, "that the small village not too far from here has the scent of evil and should quickly be cleansed. Before the night is out, in fact."

            Inuyasha managed to control his facial expression, Shippo looking up at the monk with wide eyes. "You want to sleep indoors, you mean," he stated, lifting a clawed hand to the pulsing vein near his temple.

            "It is only to be expected if we are to save the village."

            Kagome merely continued to smile. 

            The hanyou lifted his face to the sunset, the frown on his face deepening as he crossed his arms over his chest. "I suppose…for the night, it would be all right…" he mumbled after a moment absentmindedly. 

            The new moon would be upon them soon enough and he didn't want to be caught off guard. The completion of the Shikon no Tama was still far off, the way they were progressing, which meant more youkai everywhere they went.

            Kagome turned back to the stew quietly. "After dinner, then?" she asked.

            Miroku rose then, causing everyone to look toward him and he held forth a clenched fist. "I will go now and arrange a space for the group. In the meantime, eat without me. I will have some when I return." And he turned to stride down the hill they sat upon.

            Inuyasha bowed his head, thoughtful. "Shippo," he said, and he threw the kitsune a glance. "Go with him."

            "Me?"

            The hanyou's eyes narrowed.

            Kagome looked at the hanyou questioningly and then towards the small fox demon as he quickly stood and hopped off after the vanishing monk. "Inuyasha…" she said slowly, and she looked back towards the half demon, "nan desu ka?"

            The half demon came closer and gingerly sat down beside her, eyes averted. Kagome paused in the middle of stirring the stew, lowering the ladle as he hesitated with an irritated expression on his face. "Inuyasha-"

            "You've been acting strange all day," he mumbled, arms crossing over his chest, the long red sleeves of the haori enveloping his hands entirely. He refused to meet her gaze, even as she leaned toward him to catch his eyes. 

            "Have I?" 

            He didn't reply, instead closing his eyes and clenching his jaw. 

            Kagome blinked. "Hmm. Gomen nasai. I didn't mean to…" she murmured, biting down on her lip. "I wasn't even aware-"

            "Is it because of the youkai?" he cut her off and his tone was soft.

            "Youkai?"

            The hanyou paused for a moment and then, slowly, he opened his eyes, gazing off down the hill where he saw Miroku and Shippo walking. "You've been different since. More quiet. Keeping to yourself too much."

            She tilted her head. "You don't like hearing me complain as it is-"

            "Iie," he bit out and he turned his head to look at her, silver hair fluttering with the sudden gesture. "No. Something's different." His eyes narrowed as he tried to read her expression but there was nothing there, nothing except the casual worry of not understanding. 

            After a moment she smiled at him and then scooted closer to him, effectively bringing him to straighten up stiffly. "Nothing's wrong, Inuyasha. It's your imagination." And she slid her arm through one of his as he looked at her suspiciously.

            "Honto…" he asked in an undertone.

            She smiled up at him brilliantly and nodded. "Honto ni."

            _"Inuyasha!"_

            That creature. That miserable, twisted creature. With her long, reaching arms, damn her. Damn her. Long, pale limbs, still reaching after so long, to take him away. Away from her. Drag him to hell.

            Damn her.

            _"Inuyasha!"_

            With her beautiful dark hair and gentle eyes, contorting into a beast of malice. The brilliant light as she had pulled at him, dragging him into the ground as if he had belonged to her still. Still. 

            He wasn't hers anymore. Their time was ended, having passed from the earth over fifty years before. It was her turn now. She had no right. No right! She would never have a right to him again, not if she could put a stop to it.

            _"Kagome! Iie!"_

            The world was black. A painful darkness all around, the black landscape and the dreamy mist. Here was where she would stage her final confrontation. Once and for all. Her anger was pulsing in this unforgiving world. She would have what rightfully belonged to her. She would have him. 

            Her bow wavered.

            Where was he? Where was he? She couldn't see him, the world was too dark all around and she couldn't see. Inuyasha was out there, fighting the youkai and she needed to help him. She needed to be by his side, to strip the youkai of the Shikon no kakera he had consumed. Only she could see it and what good was she to him if she couldn't detect it? What _good_ was she?

            _"Kagome!"_

            His voice rang clear across the landscape, raw with grief, and she saw it, saw the shimmer of the Shikon no kakera, far off in the distance. And from here she could strike it. She could pierce it through with an arrow, right through the youkai's ugly eye into his skull. Rid the world of his hideous form. Once and for all.

            _See me…_

            Silence suddenly encompassed the black world, the shimmering Shikon shard twinkling eerily still. And from behind came the blow, raking across her shoulder, claws digging into her skin and ripping. Tearing. In this silence she fell, her form falling weak and slipping to the ground as if she weighed nothing more than a fluttering piece of paper.

            _See me…_

            No. This wasn't the way she would die. This wasn't the way she _had_ died. This wasn't the way she was **_going_** to die. The witch priestess had fallen this way but not her. Not her. She would not give Inuyasha another terror-filled memory, another death. 

            Her bow let loose the arrow with a sharp sound before falling away from her fingers. She couldn't feel. She couldn't breathe. It was so warm, the blood running down her arm, and she wept as she saw it, staining the whiteness of her shirt. No, no, no. Not again. Not again…

            _See…me…_

            The arrow struck the glimmer in the distance. The light that it emitted was dazzling, blindingly beautiful, and it washed over her, painting her a silver blue, as if she lay in moonlight. She gazed into it, straining to see to the core. But in the core stood Inuyasha, at last, flying through the air as if he were a part of it. Always hanging suspended, eternally floating. She smiled faintly, her hand held outward across the ground towards him, wishing to touch him, embrace him, once more.

            _Only me…_

            And he rose up above her, appearing through the white light and on his face were his tears, slipping down his cheeks as he cried out her name, stooping to drag her across the ground and into his waiting embrace. So warm, his arms. Always so warm.

            She awoke suddenly on her stomach, eyes snapping open with a gasp, and all she saw was the darkness, even now. She looked about frantically into that blackness, silence hanging around her as heavy as a thick blanket, suffocating her. Her eyes weren't adjusting to the shadowed world. Panic crashed down on her and she reached out a hand in terror, her nails scraping across wood as she stretched out on her stomach, clawing.

            _No. No, no, **no…**_

            Small sounds were breaking from her mouth, frightened whimpering as she dug into the wood. And her other hand met her first, also clawing fruitlessly, dragging across the surface, raking.

            _No…Inuyasha…_

            A hand came from the darkness, reaching out into streaking moonlight, and clamped down on her wrist, halting her terror-stricken search. She let out a muffled shriek, now struggling blindly, and a second hand appeared, cupping her cheek tenderly.

            She froze in mid-grapple and raised her eyes to the owner of the hands. 

            Inuyasha's face was sorrowful, his thumb grazing her cheek, his other hand still gripping hers from where he leaned over her protectively. As she gazed at him he smiled for her, and she saw the sadness still in his gaze, shimmering in his amber eyes. 

            _"Inuyasha!"_ she cried out and she closed her eyes, relief sweeping over her. His other hand released her wrist and also lifted to her face and she felt herself lifted slightly as he pulled near to her, his lips brushing a kiss to her forehead. 

            "It's all right. It was just a dream. A dream…" he murmured, his breath warm on her skin, and she bowed her head away from his mouth, throwing her arms around his legs and embracing him, pushing her face into his lap.

            "I was afraid. I was _afraid…"_ she whispered as tears streamed down her face, onto his clothes and seeping into the material. "You won't see me. You won't-"

            He bowed his head, arms wrapping around her head and holding her to him sadly.

            "You won't _see_ me…"

Another confusing chapter for all you happy people. =) I looked at my stats today and realized I only had four stories. I nearly _died_. Then I remembered that FF.net had taken down the NC-17 fics. What a waste…anyways, you can still find my Lemon fics at my website, listed in my FF.net profile. Hope you guys are still hanging on with the story!

The title of this chapter is Omoide which means Memory, if I'm correct.

For Libra: Yeah! Inuyasha is my new obsession. I was sent a doujinshi for it and the art was FANTASTIC. Unfortunately, it was a _hentai_ doujinshi so I was like, "Wow, he looks really good there…and daaaamn, I didn't know Kagome could bend like that!" =)

For Inez: Uso to Akui meant Lies and Malice (Ill Will). So she was screaming, "Lies!" in the last chapter. And I will definitely try reading the manga! I just…can't say I like the art, from what I've seen. I love the art in the anime (although that hentai doujinshi…god dang it…I needed to fan myself after that one…) but the manga art doesn't do it for me as much as the anime. But it's darker? The manga, I mean?

For KMF: I would explain to you (and anyone else who wants to know) what's happening with Kagome but then there would really be no need for me to finish the fic. Except for the lemon chapter that will eventually find its way onto my site (BECAUSE FANFICTION.NET DOESN'T ALLOW NC-17 ANYMORE!!!) but we need a plot! Ok, ~I~ need a plot! ;)

For anyone else I have not mentioned but is reading and/or has reviewed, thanks very much for your time! If you have any questions, please feel free to email me! I don't bite…any non-Asian people…

-Cassie


	4. Yume No Keikoku

_Yume No Keikoku:_

            "Ano…"

            Inuyasha lifted his head at Kagome's uncertain voice. She stood before him, hands clasped behind her back and she looked quite uncomfortable, cheeks slowly turning red. "About last night…"

            Inuyasha's dog ears twitched.

            Behind him, Miroku straightened suddenly, his staff clinking. "About last night?" he asked, halfway through packing up their things for another long walk. And his face contorted in sudden pain. "Kagome-sama…you and…Inuyasha?" he asked, wounded.

            Shippo looked from the monk to the hanyou, whose face was rapidly turning different shades of red. 

            "Oy! Baka!" the hanyou shouted at the wheezing monk. "It's not like that-"

            "Yes, Miroku-sama," Kagome said instead, causing the hanyou to freeze in place, jaw hanging open. "Inuyasha and I. Last night. Gomen nasai."

            The monk was by her side in an instant, hands clasped around hers. "Is there nothing between us, then?" he asked her mournfully, gazing into her eyes as she looked up at him. "Nothing at all? After so long wandering together, you and I, can you not find it in yourself to love me? To be mother to my child?"

            "No," she answered. "My heart belongs to another." 

            Miroku sighed and turned away, still grasping one of her hands. "Alas," he murmured, lifting the back of his free hand to his forehead woefully. "I have lost to the half demon. What a piteous day, indeed. But fear not, Kagome-sama for I will be by your side still. Awaiting my chance. Just as soon as Inuyasha turns his back-" and he peeped a look at the hanyou.

            Shippo stared back, sitting alone in the clearing. "He's been gone for a while already," he answered the unspoken question with a shrug.

            Inuyasha grumbled as he walked, palm resting on Tetsusaiga's hilt. "As if," he mumbled. "Can't turn my back for a second with him…"

            But he slowed as he walked, head bowing a bit. It would be a sight, though. The human and the hanyou. He hesitated, lifting his head to look up at the morning sun through a part of trees. Where had he heard that before? It was the same song he had already sung, with Kikyo. He had a tendency to fall hard for humans, even after all the pain he had gone through because of them. But maybe in the end, the small voice in his head, the one that sounded like Kikyo, was right. Maybe in the end, all he wanted was to be accepted.

            He glanced over his shoulder as he heard them approach and, coming around a tree, they appeared. And was that…the monk's hand on her…

            "Hey!" Kagome screamed and she instantly threw a punch that landed the monk in the tree.

            The hanyou wisely held in the cheer he had been ready to give as Shippo merely looked on, fluffy tail twitching.

            Miroku quickly pulled himself loose of the bark and appeared beside Kagome once more as she clenched another fist. "Gomen nasai, Kagome-sama. I misinterpreted the signs you were sending me-"

            "Signs?"

            A sudden scent reached Inuyasha and he whirled to face forward again, hair settling around his frame. What was that? He lifted his hand back to Tetsusaiga's hilt and Shippo suddenly landed on his shoulder, also sniffing. "Inuyasha-"

            "I smell it. But where is it…"

            "Do it again and I cut it off!" Kagome growled behind them and Inuyasha looked over his shoulder once more.

            Just in time to see the large demon lift its head above his quarreling companions.

            "Kagome!" Shippo cried, falling off Inuyasha's shoulder as the hanyou tensed for battle.

            It was hideous. They always were. But this one slobbered and spit on top of being ugly. Sunlight beamed across its scaly hide and it was an insect from the look of it. An enormous insect with two incisors snapping angrily. Above it suddenly arched a metallic-looking black tail. A stinger.

            "It's a scorpion," Shippo whispered as Kagome and Miroku only then saw it.

            The tail streaked down, biting into the ground in front of Miroku as he dove and shoved Kagome back. Dirt and pebbles flew and the creature pulled his tail from the ground, swinging once more.

            "It's mine-" Inuyasha growled and he pulled Tetsusaiga forth, brandishing it as pure light burst from the hilt. A moment later the worn blade had morphed into the fang and he leapt, coming down blade first, onto the creature's head. The blade tore into the scale and the beast issued a high-pitched shriek, instantly swinging its head about.

            "Inuyasha-" Kagome cried and she cut back another cry as the hanyou was flung aside, body falling to the ground several feet away.

            Miroku lunged forth, swinging his staff, and he evenly sliced through a leg, bringing the creature down and off-balance suddenly. He clenched his jaw and rolled, the tail barely missing as it swung above his figure. 

            The scorpion turned on Kagome, bringing her back a step in sudden fear. Tail still swinging for Miroku, it snapped at her with its two front incisors. 

            "Kitsune-bi!" Shippo cried and pure light burst from his hands, forcing the scorpion back a step. 

            A blur moved at the creature's hind quarters and Tetsusaiga chopped through another leg, forcing the creature to fall unevenly onto its rear. The tail swung, flailing, and Inuyasha dove under the demon's front, slicing upward furiously.

            The creature screamed once more, struggling as the hanyou tore Tetsusaiga from its body. One front leg lifted and knocked into the half demon, taking him down and holding him to the ground just as its tail missed the monk once more. Tetsusaiga fell from the hanyou's grip, sliding across the dirt and stopping several feet away.

            "Kagome!" Inuyasha shouted, and he looked up to where she stood frozen. "Where is the Shikon shard?"

            Kagome looked at him, wide-eyed, and then slowly raised her eyes to the creature, searching. And searching. She studied it, even circling about fearfully but she couldn't find it even though, the more she hesitated, the more she felt it. If she strained, she felt the power of a shard but she couldn't see it. She didn't know where it was…

            "Kagome!" Inuyasha shouted once more and she looked at him frantically, trembling. He stared at her from the under the grip of the creature's leg, his eyes widening as she shook her head at him, a hand lifting to her mouth in fear. And she suddenly felt, deep inside…

            _What good am I..?_

            Miroku looked toward them, down on one knee, his staff held at the ready. And then the tail swung up before him, swiftly, and Kagome shrieked blindly at him, a raw scream.

            _"Miroku!"_

            The tail tore into the monk's chest, close to his collar, and his blood flew from the sudden attack. He went down with a muffled cry, slamming roughly into the ground, dust floating up from his contact with the dirt. 

            "Miroku!" Inuyasha yelled as the creature lifted off the hanyou a bit to exert more pressure into the piercing tail. 

            The monk winced, trembling, and the demon leaned into him, his tail stabbing clear through him and into the dirt ground underneath his form.

            _"Hiraikotsu!"_

            The large boomerang suddenly came through the clearing, streaking across the ground and cutting cleanly through the tail. Kagome gasped, straightening, and from the trees came a large beige feline creature with furious red eyes. Fire smoked around his form and seated on his back was Sango, dressed in her extermination gear. She leapt from Kirara's back and landed in a crouch beside the monk, long hair flowing. 

            Miroku smiled at her faintly as she leaned over him, fear in her eyes. "It's nothing," he whispered. "Just a cut-"

            Sango took hold of him roughly and pulled him against her. She was sure his eyes had widened but a moment later she took hold of the tailpiece still embedded in the monk's chest, ripping it free. He stiffened in pain but barely had a moment to register anything more for she suddenly rolled to her left, taking him with her as the ragged scorpion's tail swung down, barely missing them. She ended up straddling him and he grimaced, settling painfully once more.

            "And here I thought you were just lonely and wanting attention…" he gasped, clenching his jaw against the pain from the wound.

            "Shut up," Sango said softly, and her tone was heavy with fear. She lifted a hand above her head and the bone boomerang returned, its weight forcing her to clench down to keep from being dragged. 

            Inuyasha bucked under the scorpion's leg, and with an angry growl he swiped with an open-clawed hand, tearing streaks of light across the scorpion's leg. The creature let loose another screech and then, wobbling, he fell flat, Inuyasha buried under.

            "Inuyasha!" Kagome cried and she lunged forward, taking Tetsusaiga into her hand. With a shaky breath she fell forward, stabbing the creature through the head with the shabby sword. 

            The creature managed one last shriek as its head parted in half under the blade of Tetsusaiga. The pieces fell to the ground before Kagome as she slid to her knees, hands clenched around the fang's hilt. Looking down she grimaced, shoving herself away from the black blood that oozed out. A moment later the creature began to melt into a large mass, falling apart, and all she did was stare, bile rising in her throat.

            With a groan Inuyasha rose from the mess, disgust on his face as he swiped at his clothes, fingers sending the black stickiness splattering all around. "Why can't they just die?" he grumbled and he lifted his head to look at Kagome as she raised her eyes to him. "What happened?" he asked her, taking a step forward. And then he glanced over his shoulder to where the monk still lay with the demon exterminator. "Miroku!"

            The monk waved wearily and Sango forced his hand down, looking irritated with him. 

            Inuyasha turned back to Kagome, coming closer. "What happened?" he asked again.

            She shook her head at him, hesitant. "I…don't know," she whispered and she looked down at Tetsusaiga still caught in her grasp. "I couldn't see it, Inuyasha. The Shikon no kakera…I couldn't see it, but I felt it. I feel it still but…" she didn't even bother lifting her head, "I still can't see it."

            Shippo scooted closer, bushy tail twitching, and he dug into the mess of molten scorpion. "It's here," he said and he lifted a glowing piece of crystal, waving it at the hanyou. "The Shikon shard, I have it!"

            Inuyasha glanced at him and then slowly, once more, looked to Kagome. 

            Unwillingly, she lifted her gaze back up to meet Inuyasha's. "What good am I?" she asked him softly.

Ok, I'm leaving this for my sis to upload for me since I'll be gone for a few days. Sorry it's taken me so long but I really don't want to fall behind on this fic the way I did with the Witch Child so I pretty much handed over the Witch Child to Aes to finish for me. Let's see if she can. In the meantime, enjoy the chapter and I'll try to have the next one out soon!

Drop me an email if you're confused about anything!

-Cassandra


	5. Tsuiseki

_Tsuiseki_:

            "Kagome-chan?" Sango asked softly, looking toward where the girl sat by herself out of the corner of her eye. She had directed the question at the hanyou and when he didn't reply she glanced at him, to where he sat on the other side of the campfire, gazing at the same girl with a mournful expression. Beside Sango lay Miroku, smiling cheerfully even though under his robes he was bound tightly with bandages. 

            "She's been off by herself for a few days now," the monk confided and Sango looked down at him, catching sight of his hand as it squirmed closer to her rear. The glare she sent made him pause and his expression turned innocent. "I can't stretch anymore?" he asked her.

            Kirara lay beside Kagome, purring as the girl ran her fingers through his thick fur. But she gazed off into the darkness of the woods, swallowing every once in a while. And Shippo also sat, looking uncomfortable, and worried as well. 

            "I'm taking a walk," Kagome said suddenly and as everyone lifted their eyes to look at her she bowed her head and turned.

            "Oy-" Inuyasha uttered, taken off guard, and he rose quickly, as she vanished into the forest.

            Sango reached a hand out to him as he began to follow. "Inuyasha. I think she wants to be alone. I don't think-"

            A hand firmly gripped her rear and she squeaked, sitting up straight. With a growl she whirled on the monk and suddenly pulled her bone boomerang from her back, smacking him with it. "Stop it already!" she shouted. "I thought you were hurt!"

            Miroku's eyes were whirling. "I am now…"

            Sango turned back toward Inuyasha, setting down her boomerang and found him gone. Shippo remained, curling up on Kirara's back, which he used as a pillow. 

            "He went after Kagome."

            _I want to help them. I can't be helpless like this, I can't. Always needing someone to save me, or depend on me. I can't do this anymore…_

            The Shikon no Tama shimmered in the darkness of the forest, where she kneeled surrounded by trees and shadows. In her hands it was beautiful, glimmering powerfully. And it called to her.

            _Everyone puts in a share except me. If I can't detect the shards anymore…what good am I?_

            It slowly pulsated and, inside, mist seemed to rise, spreading about the jagged piece she held on a chain. 

            _I want to be stronger. I want to be a part of this. I want to laugh again._

            She saw Miroku in its depths, probably an image she herself saw in her head. But he was there nonetheless, and his hand was outstretched, the black hole in his palm swallowing everything in sight. And Sango, riding on Kirara and shouting, flinging her bone weapon. Flames, from Kirara's form. 

            _I need to be like them. I need to be stronger. Braver._

            Shippo, firing brilliant blue light from his hands.

            _I need courage. To fight. To fight for my friends. Courage to-_

            And Inuyasha with his sly smile as he lunged forward, the Tetsusaiga blazing in his grip. Inuyasha, as he came down on a youkai, swinging his blade and hacking it down, as if it was just in his way. Inuyasha, as he smiled at her, one of the rare times he ever did. But she treasured those moments, the moments when he allowed her to wrap an arm through his, or when he allowed her to merely gaze at him for a long period. Before he started to turn red and demand to know why she stared.

            _Courage to fight for what is mine.****_

            In the Shikon piece she saw her, again. With her long hair and gentle eyes. And her own eyes narrowed wrathfully, her hand tightening around the Shikon no Tama, trying to hide the miko's wretched face underneath her grip. But it seared straight through, burning her skin, no matter how much she willed the image away.

            _Kikyo._

            With her perfect face, her soulful eyes. 

            _Kikyo._

            Her slender frame as she walked in the forest, with birds chirping as she came close, animals coming toward her and greeting her as if she were visiting a damn zoo.

            _Kikyo._

            Holding Inuyasha in her arms and leaning up to him to brush her lips against his as he merely stared at her in disbelief. As she took hold of him and pressed closer, arching against him to fit against his frame. They always fit so perfectly. Always.

            The tears slipped from her eyes, from pure anger. And a deep hurt. His words that day. From his very own mouth. Anything for her. He would do anything for her, always.

            Always.

            "Kagome…" his voice came against her ear and she whirled, seeing him through a blur of tears. His face was pinched with worry, fear as well, and his clawed hand closed around her wrist as he forced her to turn, to face him more. _"Kagome-"_

            She merely stared at him, lips parted, her hand opening a bit and allowing the brilliant light of the Shikon no Tama to bathe over them.

            His eyes dropped to the Shikon no Tama. "What are you doing?" And then, when she didn't reply his gaze shifted to her mouth. "Why won't you _talk_ to me?" he asked, sounding for the first time as if he pleaded. "Why can't you just tell me what's _wrong-"_

            _Courage to fight for what is **mine.**_

            With sudden purpose, she closed the space between them then, cutting his words off. Her hand lifted to his face, eyes closing, and she heard him gasp before her lips brushed his, once. Tenderly. She felt the heat of his hands, hovering over her arms, not touching. 

            _From fear? From not…wanting this?_

            A wave of panic fell over her and she rose onto her knees, clutching the Shikon no Tama in her grip possessively, pulling him against her just as possessively. He went to her, and she heard his heart pounding clearly in her own skin, his frame stiff. Her kiss deepened, needing him to respond, but he didn't. He merely stood pressed against her, supporting her above him, his hands only now clasping her arms weakly. 

            She pulled back slowly, not wanting to open her eyes. She didn't want to see the worry in his eyes anymore. Didn't want to see the confusion. The _platonic_ confusion. 

            _You're mine. **You're mine!** Why can't you be **mine?**_

            His hands released her arms and as she opened her eyes she saw it, the expression. The worry. The confusion, yes. Right there, in his amber gaze. And she saw his hands as they came up toward her face, reaching to take her between them. 

            _You don't see me. Even now. You see-_

            His hands closed around her jaw, an expression of awe on his face.

            _Kikyo._

            _"Iie!"_ she cried and she sprang backward, onto her feet. She closed her eyes, lifting her fisted hands to them and suddenly, furiously, she flung the Shikon no Tama. Flung the blasted jewel that held the miko's face within. The jewel that held the battle continuously waged between the youkai and Midoriko. She threw it angrily, bringing Inuyasha to his feet, a cry breaking from his mouth.

            "Kagome!"

            Soundlessly she whirled and fled in the opposite direction, crashing through the trees and needing to escape. Escape it all.

            Inuyasha looked after her and then, with a curse, turned to go after the Shikon no Tama, seeing its brilliant shimmer not too far off. With a leap he came down beside it, his hand closing around it and he stared at it for a moment, merely looking at it. In its depths he saw nothing save for the searing glow. Clutching it close he turned once more, this time in Kagome's direction, and he ran, one powerful bound after another. In this thick forest she wouldn't make it far.

            Sure enough he saw her figure as he came down from a leap, stumbling passed a tree, running blindly. He leapt once more and came down before her, catching her in his arms as she ran into them. Flailing, she tried to break free, her expression one of terror as she looked at the Shikon no Tama in his hand. "Hanashite! _Hanashite!"_ she cried. And she suddenly barreled forward, taking him down roughly.

            Inuyasha crashed onto his back with her on top, taken off balance. She recovered first, ripping free of his grip and staggering to her feet to run on frantically. He rose an instant later and was already in the air, coming down on her from above when she shouted, _"Osuwari!"_

            The force of the spell flung him to the ground, taking her down under him. They both slammed down together, Kagome crying out fearfully as she took his entire weight upon herself, hitting painfully.

            And for a moment there was nothing but silence, Inuyasha lying on top of her, breathing rapidly, the Jewel clutched in his palm. He was afraid to move for a second, and a part of him, he realized, didn't want to. She was gasping under him, her hair cushioning his face like a soft pillow. Her racing heartbeat ran from her into him, coursing through him. She was tired from the chase, shoulders heaving. With an inward groan he moved his hands from where they rested around her waist and he sat up over her, ready to go after her if she suddenly decided to flee once more. 

            But she laid there, on her stomach, and after another moment she lifted her arms, dragging them across the dirt, and hiding her head in them, frame stiffening.

            "I'm sorry," she whispered, her voice muffled. "I'm so sorry…"

            He stared down at her in confusion, gazing at her as she trembled, and with an inaudible sigh he reached down to her, pushing away a lock of her from her ear. "Kagome…"

            She didn't say anything more to him and he bowed his head silently. After a moment he laid back down, this time beside her and his arm stole around her waist, pulling her close to his side. She went, sniffling, and finally turned to him, pressing close to him.

            "Just…tell me," he said quietly.

            She shook her head, averting her eyes but her hand stole up to his and pried open his claws, taking the jewel back. He let her, silently, and he remained silent as she buried her face in his chest, clutching the Shikon no Tama to her breast.

The next chapter is done and it's NC-17, ppl! It's up on my website, (finally updated!) stop by and check it out, tell me what you think. Drop me an email, I love emails! ;) And thanks for reading!

-Cass


	6. Seijaku

If you haven't read it yet, you _must_ read the NC-17 chapter that came before this chapter being posted now. It can be found on my website, TasogareBan, and the site is listed in my profile. Please read that before reading this (unless you're just not into NC-17)!

Seijaku:

            Kagome sat up in one fluid movement, a gasp of terror breaking from her lips. 

            It was dark, all around. Moonlight seeped in hazily in between parted trees and she sat, breathing painfully, chest lifting and falling erratically. 

            _He did it. He did it even though I fought, even though I **begged**-_

            "Kagome."

            Startled, she snapped her head around to see Inuyasha seated and leaning against the trunk of a tree, Tetsusaiga resting against his chest, the way it always did when he stood watch over the others as they slept. His eyes were hooded, arms crossed over his blade. And his hair was silver, his eyes amber. In the night he was still half-demon.

            "Nightmare?" he asked quietly and something shone in his gaze.

            She stared at him, wide-eyed. "Yes. Nightmare. A very bad nightmare…" she whispered and she turned back around slowly, head bowing wearily. 

            _I had a nightmare that you forced me and that you still wanted her. After everything she put you through you still wanted **her-**_

            "You called for me," he murmured to her back for she did not turn back around to face him. "You called out my name as you slept."

            She tilted her head a bit, inhaling, even as her eyes closed painfully. "Gomen ne," she whispered. "It was a very bad…nightmare."

            Behind her the half-demon hesitated. And then she heard the sounds of him rising and he came closer, crouching down behind her but not moving to make her turn to face him. "What was it about?" he questioned quietly.

She didn't answer him. She would never answer that question. Never. Instead, she looked at him over her shoulder, gazing into his amber eyes from up close for he sat hunched, like a suspicious dog. She stared at him, silently. And then she looked at herself.

            _She's no longer pure. She no longer cares. And if that is the kind of person you desire…_

            "If Miroku was in it-" he growled haughtily.

            She turned to face him, lifting a hand to his face, her finger pressing to his lips. The gesture brought him to a freezing halt, his eyes widening as she leaned into him intimately. "Miroku-sama was not in it. Only one person was in it with me." 

            He stared at her, seemingly shocked beyond words.

            She lowered her eyes to his lips, her finger sliding down to his bottom lip and tugging at it almost playfully.

            _I'll become her. I'll become more than her, become what she wished she could have been, so long ago. I'll have what she wanted…_

            Inuyasha lowered his own eyes to her lips, stiff. But his eyes darkened and she had seen his eyes darken the same way in the blackness of her dream, her beloved nightmare. She rose forward a bit, bringing herself closer, but then she was passed his lips and he exhaled tremulously, eyes closing as she leaned her cheek against his lips, her own lips whispering against his skin.

            _And I won't allow the Shikon no Tama to stop me. I won't bear the burden of being a Priestess. If she can have you her way, her twisted way, then I'll have you in the only way she could not… _

            Her mouth stole across his jaw and he leaned away from her, only offering a soft, "Wait-" as she followed, not willing to release him. Not just yet. 

            _I'll have you as a simple girl._

            And with only a small smile she pulled away, rising to her feet. He stared at her, frowning, as she simply turned on her heel and sauntered off, the Shikon no Tama clutched in her hand and glowing eerily in the darkness. And he could only follow with his eyes, his breathing coming out in gasps, his silver hair blowing in the gentle wind.

            "How is Miroku-sama?" asked Kagome, looking over toward Sango.

            The other girl was lying down, her face turned to the brilliant sun, and beside her was the wounded monk, dozing quietly. "Complaining. Again. Complaining about, _'Oh, the pain, the pain…only one thing would make me better…'_ And we all know what that one thing is."

            Kagome chuckled inwardly and she turned her face in Inuyasha's direction where he sat in the tree, glaring at her suspiciously. "Sometimes, Miroku-sama has the right idea in mind," she murmured.

            Sango peeked an eye open and glanced at her. "Maybe we aren't agreeing on what that _'one thing'_ is?" she questioned.

            "Oh, she seems to understand perfectly," Miroku added suddenly, and he flinched as Sango batted at him.

            "I thought you were asleep!"

            "Well, I'm not going to get any sleep if you keep hitting me. I won't get better if you keep it up, either!"

            Shippo, from where he lay on Kirara's chest, snorted and promptly returned to sleep.

            "This is nice," Sango murmured with one last swipe at Miroku, and she smiled up at the sun. "We don't get to rest often and the weather changes too much." She moved her bone boomerang over a bit and curled her arm around it.

            "It's true," Kagome agreed. And she looked down at her hand where she held the Shikon no Tama. It shimmered brilliantly and she felt her animosity well up inside, gazing at it blankly. It always swirled with such pretty, innocent colors. She wondered what it looked like inside, from Midoriko's point of view.

            Very slowly, she turned her head and looked up at Inuyasha through her lashes.

            His expression was wavering as if he expected the worst.

            She smiled at him, darkly, and swiftly closed her hand over the jewel, lifting it to her chest as she suddenly rose to her feet.

            "Kagome?" Sango asked, the gesture bringing her out of her dazed state.

            "I need to return to my world for a few days," she said and she wandered over to her backpack, tossing in several items. She pulled out the first aid kit she carried and brought it over to Sango as the girl rose onto her rear. "Hold this here for Miroku-sama. Change the bandages often. And always clean the wound with this." She held up a small bottle of alcohol. With that she closed the kit and handed it to the exterminator.

            Sango nodded as she accepted it.

            "I'll be gone for a few days," Kagome finished.

            "And the Shikon no Tama?" inquired Inuyasha quietly from the tree.

            She didn't bother looking at him. "That goes with me. Everywhere," she stated and she closed up her backpack, slinging it over her shoulder. Her bike rested against a tree a few feet away and she went to it, taking off the kickstand. 

            "Bring more ramen," Shippo said groggily and he still seemed asleep.

            "Hai," she said with a small smile to his dozing form.

            She had only just gotten on her bike when finally Inuyasha rose. "Oy-" but she ignored him and kicked off, riding down the hill. She only had to go for a few days, get a few things in order, work on her plans. Which meant she needed to be away from him. Away from them as a group. Just for a little while.

            There was a sudden weight on the back of her bike and she looked over her shoulder to see him directly behind her, his face dark. "Inuyasha-"

            "Keep going. We'll talk when you get to the well," was all he said and he rose to his feet, holding himself up on the bike spokes, his arms crossing over his chest.

            Kagome faced forward again, her hands tightening on the handlebars angrily. It was always like this. He always had something to say, some reason for her not to go to her world. She wasn't there to be his slave. Hell, he needed _her_ to find the Shikon shards; it wasn't the other way around! She was the one who didn't need _him!_ She would hear an earful once they got to the well because he always had something to say. She pedaled faster, angrily, not even feeling the air as it blew across her hair. 

            And had he really thought she was going to leave the Shikon no Tama with him? A half-demon who only wanted to become fully demon? There was no way! None at all! She wasn't crazy or stupid. He would be a danger with the power of the jewel in his grasp. He would wreak havoc, destroy entire towns and villages. He would be the very creature that _woman_ had hunted so many years ago. 

            The sun was blindingly powerful and she bowed her head against the glare.

            He was a creature. That's all he was. A demon. _A thing_. A thing that had managed to make two humans fall in love with him. And he wasn't even a _nice_ demon. She pedaled harder still, feeling the burn in her lungs. How had he ever managed that? And what had she seen in him to make her fall so hard?

            _So hard..?_

            The well appeared in the distance and she realized she has been pedaling enough to make her heart beat painfully in her chest. No, that was her anger. Her anger at him. At his presence. His voice. It was boiling inside, raging furiously and it was searching for an outlet. But now was not the time. First things were going to be done her way, until she had everything that was owed to her. Until she had him-

            She screeched to a halt, hoping somewhere deep inside that the continued momentum would have flung him but he was off her bike before even she was. She dismounted and kept her back to him, readjusting her backpack and stooping to lift the bike.

            He shoved her aside unceremoniously.

            "Hey-" she shouted, throwing him a glare that she wished would cut him into pieces. And as he lifted the bike for her, "Don't even think about it! I'm going whether you like it or not! Nothing you say is going to stop me from going and if you think you're going to hold my bike like…like some sort of _hostage-"_

            "You need time to yourself," he said quietly, holding the bike with one hand, on his shoulder.

            She recoiled at his soft tone. "What?"

            He looked at her, and his expression was gentle. And he seemed embarrassed as he realized how soft he sounded. "You need time," he continued nonetheless, in a gruffer tone, "to yourself. Away from this world. Away from…us."

            Kagome stood silently, lips parted.

            "I don't know what has been going on the passed few days. The passed few weeks," he said and his expression was sincere, albeit a bit sad. "And I don't know if…I've caused it but you need to go. Just…get away for a bit. Come back to yourself and then…come back to me."

            She blinked at him, her throat dry and as he fell silent she felt the sudden onslaught of tears. She felt her anger, still, and it was sinking away into the pit of her stomach, far away into the recesses of her darkness, but she also felt the urge to suddenly weep at ever having felt such a fury against him. "Inuyasha-" she whispered, and she lifted a hand slowly.

            He gave her hand a small, measured glance before turning away from it and he floated over to the well, hopping up onto its edge.

            She stared at him, looking up at him as the sun came washing down over him and she pulled her hand back, wounded. 

            _But it's your fault. It's your fault. And hers. Hers, as well, and you always do this. No matter how much you make me believe you can only love me, that there's the small chance that you would be mine alone, you can't bear for it to be just me. You can't bear to be away from her, doing anything in anyone else's name._

            Inuyasha, silently, held out a hand to her.

            _And you want me to go. You want me to go back to my time. Why? So that your search for her can go unhindered. So that if she does decide to take you back as her only love, you won't have me holding you back. You won't feel bad because I won't be here._

            "It's what you want," she whispered.

            He frowned faintly, his fingers closing a bit in confusion.

            _If I go, you'll go to her. You'll go to her and I'll be left alone. The way I'm always left alone every time I see the expression on your face at the mention of her name. You always pull away a bit more, and a bit more, and I'm left so alone-_

            His eyes shimmered in the sun, hair blowing gently, and his hand was still held out to her.

            _And I can't let her have you. Because she's evil. Because she doesn't understand what it is to have you. To love you. At one point she may have but she gave it up and now I understand. Now it's me and you don't…you don't want me._

            She took a step forward and his face was stern but soft at the same time, it was so strange. His curled hand was motioning to her, his claws reflecting the sunlight, and she reached up slowly, allowing his fingers to close around hers, to wrap around her wrist. And then he was lifting her as if she weighed nothing, helping her climb up beside him.

            "Will you visit me?" she asked him quietly as she looked down into the well. It was dark down there and it always seemed to lead nowhere but the moment she fell in she knew she would be on her way home.

            "I…" he frowned at her, breaking off.

            She looked at him, her heart breaking.

            _Of course you won't. The moment I'm gone I won't even exist to you._

            She shook her head. "Forget it," she murmured and she didn't care. Without another word she jumped into the well.

            "Hey-" he swiped at her but she was gone, the rip opening to claim her. He quickly tossed the bike after her and stooped at the edge of the well, growling, as it vanished from view and then all that was left was the bottom of the well.

            "I didn't think you would be gone so long that I would have to visit you…" he finished softly and he bowed his head, already missing her scent.

Ok so I updated this story and the Lord of the Rings one. I'm sorry it has taken me so long but the sudden frenzy of the Two Towers opening has gotten me back into LOTR (and no, neither of us have actually _seen_ it) so my sis and I are trying to finish that story and she's also trying to get back into her solo piece as well so we've both been pretty busy. Gomen nasai…

Thank you all for your reviews, hope you continue to like the story!

-Cass


	7. Mae Ni

Mae Ni:

            _Something's wrong. Something's been wrong for a while now. My body feels strange and I feel so tired. So tired of it all._

            The sunset was beautiful outside and it slipped in through her curtains, into her dark room. She gazed at the windows, at the sunset, with a blank, weary expression. Her room was a cool blue, except for where the sunlight made it a copper  yellow. She felt as cold as the blue.

            _How long has it been? How long have I been here? Where have I been at all? _

            Time seemed to flow differently here. When she had returned her mother and her grandfather had been happy to see her. At least they were. Her brother had, of course, wanted to know all about Inuyasha. He looked up to the half-demon. 

Those first days had flown, one melting into the next until she couldn't differentiate between them. And now they dragged, one sunset finally turning into night at such an unbearably slow pace. All her evenings were spent like this, gazing out into nothingness, seeing nothing. Nothing but his face. 

            She wanted to see him.

            But he didn't want to see her, which was why he hadn't made an effort to come through into her time. The shrine remained silent, the well abandoned. And the Shikon no Tama glittered, reflecting the copper glow of the dying sun, throwing strange and beautiful colors across her walls. She stared at them, her hand shifting the jewel, watching the colors flash, jumping around from place to place. Inuyasha moved like that, swiftly, unexpectedly. Always so beautifully.

            _Inuyasha…_

            She dreamed of him. During the night, during the day. Always. She saw his face in her mind and she cradled it to her heart but then it would be replaced with _her_ face and the whole image was ruined, destroyed. It hurt to think that between the two of them they shared so much, including him. Especially him. She gazed at the Shikon no Tama, as it glittered delicately, and she cursed it. Cursed Midoriko. Cursed the ever-waging battle. Cursed the light that shone from within and the darkness she felt throughout. And cursed Kikyo for returning. Because of her Inuyasha would never be free to become full youkai. In the end it would be Kikyo's fault. She would see that to the end.

            Slowly he pulled himself out of the well, looking about in the evening sunset. A bit of that sunset leaked in through musty windows and he looked up to the door of the shrine. Closed and empty. Everything was silent except for the occasional scurrying of small animals. He sniffed silently and he could smell her in the air, in the shrine. She was close by; her smell permeated the entire area. Hefting himself out of the well, he hesitated on the edge, crouching warily. 

            She had been gone for so long, he had almost convinced himself that he had forgotten what she smelled like. But being here, like this, so close to her, she flooded his thoughts, made him lose any words. He had once thought that having her safely away was better than having her close at hand in battle but he knew better now. With her by his side he was unstoppable. She was his strength and his courage. And the voice of his conscience, deep inside.

            He hopped off the well and slowly made his way up the stairs, pausing at the shrine door. He wanted to see her. Now.

            She was hearing small noises. And she almost fooled herself into believing that the splintering light of the Shikon no Tama was making the noises. But then she heard the soft sounds again and she knew it was not the jewel. A shadow darted at her window and she sat up instantly. Too big to be a small animal. And she didn't wish for it to be a _large_ animal. She shoved the jewel under her pillow and slowly rose from the bed, her heart pounding. If it was her brother he was going to get it. 

            The window slowly and quietly slid open and she stared as she saw clawed hands grip the glass. A moment later he poked his head in, large dog-ears twitching.

            "Inuyasha!"

            The ears perked up straight and his amber eyes caught on her as she paused before him, her hands on her hips angrily.

            "What do you think you're doing, sneaking into my room like this?"

            He glared at her as he pulled himself in fully, seating himself on the windowsill. "Well, you seem to be very much alive and not sick at all," he said, crossing his arms over his chest.

            "What are you talking about?" she hissed at him, ignoring the sweet pangs that ran through her just to see his face, no matter how haughty he seemed. She watched him as he turned his face away in a feline gesture that did not fit his canine form.

            "You're not dying or writhing on the floor in any sort of _discomfort_ so I'm just wondering what is taking you so long to get yourself back through the well," he growled in her direction although he didn't face her.

            She felt the beginning of her anger bubble up but quickly tried to shove it down. He was here, here for _her_, wasn't that good enough? It meant he had worried about her, had wondered about where she had been and what she had been doing. Had worried that she wasn't all right. She took a step closer to him, her hands falling from her hips and he straightened a bit as she drew close but did his best not show that he had noticed.

            "I worried you?" she asked him softly.

            He arched a twitching eyebrow. "Keh," he spat under his breath. "Why should I worry about you? You come and go as you please and you think you can take care of yourself. I just came for the ramen."

            She came to a screeching halt. "Ramen?"

            And then he finally looked at her, his amber eyes narrowed, arms still crossed over his chest. "And I came to make sure the Shikon no Tama was still intact," he said quietly, his voice firm.

            She stared at him. For a long moment all she did was stare at him. And she felt the happiness die away, the sweet feeling that came with seeing him, she allowed it to melt away. His face was dark in the sunset, and purposeful, and she did not like it. It angered her, to know that he did not trust her.

            "Why would it not be intact?" she asked.

            _You care only about becoming a full demon._

            His face softened a bit at her question and he said, "The last time we had a problem concerning it you didn't seem to care one way or another what you did with it."

            _Did she send you for the Shikon no Tama? Did she miss having it, holding it in the palm of her hand, upon the necklace? Did she lose control of you once she did not have it in her possession?_

            "It is still intact," she said softly but she did not go to retrieve it. She gazed at him, at the copper glow that painted his hair gold, that made his amber eyes come alive. "You have nothing to fear. I would not abandon you in your hour of need."

            He frowned slowly at her as she took another step closer and his arms fell away limply. "I never accused you of abandoning me, Kagome," he said to her faintly. "It's the last thing I would ever want-"

            She lifted a hand and pressed a finger to his lips.

            _I can't hear this from you. I can't hear lies drop from your lips. And I can't hear you tell such sweet lies only to shut me up. _

            He gazed at her with wide amber eyes as she drew close to him at last, looking down at him from inches away. His gaze wavered a bit, studying her wordlessly, and he was stiff. Wary.

            _The truth of it comes out slowly. _

            "Do I make you nervous?" she asked him questioningly.

            For a small moment there seemed to be a war waged inside, one that splintered out through the expressions that crossed his face. He seemed ready to retort that nothing made him nervous, that he laughed in the face of death. But instead he said, "You're making me nervous right now." His eyes narrowed a bit as he gazed at her. "I don't know what you're thinking. I don't like not knowing."

            She hesitated, her finger playing across his bottom lip. She wanted those lips, right then. To feel his teeth nip at bite at her through those lips. To see just how gentle, or how wild, he could be. And he seemed to sense her thoughts for he was stiff enough to break like cardboard if bent the wrong way.

            "Did she make you nervous?" she asked in the faintest whisper, leaning close enough that her breath was warm against his face.

            His eyes slid shut against his own will, his skin burning and very much aware of her, every bit of her. "Nani?" he asked, swallowing breathlessly, arching slowly toward her.

            She lifted her other hand to his face, running her fingers over his smooth skin, pressing against him. "I said," she echoed almost in a purr, "did she make you nervous?" And she leaned her face down against his cheek, inhaling his scent, her hair falling across his lips. 

            His chest heaved against her, hands fisting, claws digging into his palms. "Who?" he asked her senselessly, tingling as her hair brushed against his lips, sliding silkily.

            "Kikyo…"

            For a moment there was nothing except the sound of the world outside her window, and the name of the long dead priestess. It floated, her name, murmured and caught by a gentle breeze.

            And Inuyasha suddenly grasped her by her arms with a vice-like grip, claws burying into her skin. She grimaced at the sudden pain and he shoved her backward, away from him to be able to look her in the eyes.

            "What did you just say?" he asked her in the softest tone, springing to his feet and standing over her.

            She stared up at him, seeming completely lost and bewildered and he shook her forcefully, his amber eyes narrowed in sudden anger. "Inuyasha-"

            _"What did you just say?"_

            She had never seen him so angry. And his anger brought out the fury she had in herself as well. "What does it matter what I said?" she demanded, her tone rising, and she struggled vainly for a moment, trying to pull her arms free of his claws but his grip was powerful and she only succeeded in dragging his claws along her flesh as she wrenched back a bit. "It isn't as if I were wrong-"

            "Of course you're wrong!" he shouted and he shook her almost violently, his face twisted in fury. "You're always wrong about everything when it comes to her! _To us!_"

            She grimaced, eyes closing as she yanked herself backwards. He did not release her and she found herself dragged toward him easily, as if he put no mind to it. "You're just…a _hanyou_!" she shrieked and as his lips parted at her words he suddenly released her, his form stiffening.

            She fell backward to the floor with a small cry, crashing, and when she opened her eyes she saw his form against the copper sunlight. He loomed dangerously and she found herself suddenly frightened of him, of his formidable height. 

            "Just a hanyou?" he asked her in a broken whisper.

            She sat up onto her rear, hands lifting her. "It's all you are!" she shouted shrilly, heaving for a single breath. "It was all Kikyo saw in you! A half demon! She didn't love you! She didn't know what it _was_ to love you!"

            He stared at her, his jaw hanging open and the look of disbelief on his face…it hurt _her._

            Kagome broke off, returning the stare, understanding that he trembled. And her anger was white hot, to know that an insult to Kikyo was an insult to him as well. She rose onto her knees slowly, a glare upon her face and he backed away a step, hands clenched into fists at his sides. Her eyes flashed at his gesture. "You're angry at the truth-"

            His teeth shone momentarily, and he issued forth a growl as he glowered down at her. "Truth?" he asked in a dangerous whisper. "What do you know about truth? What do you know about me? About Kikyo? Being her reincarnation doesn't mean you _know_ her-"

            "I am _not_ her reincarnation!" she shouted, paling in anger. "Do not look at me and _see_ me as her! My name is Kagome!"

            "You could have fooled me," he hissed, his face dark. "I look at you and I see her. Her eyes. Her hair-" his hand rose and swiped at her hair, taking several locks into his grip. "Her face-"

            She grimaced as his hold on her hair tightened and she lifted her hands to try to undo his grasp.

            "Her cheeks. Her chin," and he said softly, reluctantly, "her lips. Her smile-"

            She shook her head. She didn't want to hear this, any of it. She didn't want to hear that she was only a mirror image of the priestess. It was too much. _She_ was too much, so much more than herself. She could never compete against Kikyo, not when it came down to Inuyasha.

            He fell to his knees before her suddenly, his other hand taking her face into his grasp. "Her mouth. Always her mouth-" and his eyes shone brightly as she looked into them, into the amber irises. "_Your_ mouth-"

            She stared at him, gazed at him wordlessly, her lips parted at the emotion on his face, the broken-hearted pain. And she had never wanted to see that look on his face. 

_I never wanted to see you look like this…_

Her heart breaking, she threw her arms around his shoulders, lifting herself into his embrace and she pressed her mouth to his. One powerful kiss, frenetic, her hands tangling in his hair. His breath had been stolen from him, it was clear in the way he stiffened, but it took only a moment to regain his bearings. Then his arms were trapping her against his chest, his mouth molding against hers as if she sustained him solely. Her breath seemed to be his, her heartbeat his own. She whimpered faintly against him as he dragged her forward, onto his knees, against him. So close together, as if they made up one person between the two of them. His breath heated her skin, his tongue soft against hers even though the kiss was wild. As wild as he was. 

            _This is what she could never have. This is why I'm not her, why I can never be Kikyo._

            She straddled his thighs, her back straightening and making her loom over him. But he did not release her from the kiss, a gentle growl rumbling in his throat. She loved that sound, when it came from him, when it traveled down her frame the way it did then. 

            _Kikyo could never be one with you the way I can. She could never give herself to you the way I can. And she could never get this kind of reaction from you, I won't believe that she ever could have-_

            Her hands lifted to his haori, pulling it free from his frame, up over his head. He pulled away from her wordlessly as she yanked it from him and as she tossed it aside he merely stared at her for a moment, a frown on his face. Silent, much too silent. She bent into him once more, kissing him breathlessly, and he allowed her, his breath leaving him as well in a soft sigh. And his kiss was softer now, gentler, his claws digging into her thighs where his hands had come to rest.

            _She could never give you this…not before…_

            "And not now," she whispered against his mouth and she lifted her hands to his white top and yanked the folds apart.

Been a while, huh? I've been working on this chapter for like…forever. And the next chapter, which is totally NC-17, is done but I have no time at all to post on the website and I absolutely refuse to post it under my name as an "R" chapter because quite honestly, no one under 17 should be reading the next chapter, LMAO! So, gomen nasai, but you will all have to wait until I post the chapter after this one up on the site. 

Also, if anyone wants to send me their NC-17 fics (for any anime, really, and make sure it's tastefully done, no rampant sex and violence or anything) I'd be happy to post it up on my site. It'll help make the site grow and reach beyond Inuyasha and CCS. 

In the meantime, I hope you like this chapter and check the site every once in a while (the site is on my profile page) for the next chapter which is called Ima wa Dame. =)

-Cassie


	8. Sayonara

_Please read the NC-17 chapter on my site titled Ima Wa Dame before reading this! Thank you!_

_Sayonara:_

            The sun had set and it felt like they had been sitting in the dark room for hours. But it couldn't have been so long. The moonlight came through her light curtains, a pool of light on the floor. And there had been nothing but silence between them for the entire time.

            Inuyasha lifted his head again, Tetsusaiga resting against him where he sat beside Kagome's bed. And Kagome sat with her legs tucked under her, several feet away, at the foot of the bed but seated on the floor. She was still staring at the floor, her arms wrapped around herself, and she still trembled slightly.

            Before her, in her sight, lay the Shikon no Tama in a pool of moonlight all its own, as if sacred. 

            Inuyasha inhaled soundlessly, opening his mouth to say something, _anything,_ but then, as she pulled her gaze from the jewel painfully he thought against it.

            And so they sat in silence still.

            "I see her face."

            Inuyasha's head snapped up as she whispered it, faintly in the moonlit room. He stared at her and she had her face turned away, nearly invisible in the darkness.

            "Always her face…" she uttered and she lifted a trembling hand to her hair, fighting to smooth it in a casual gesture. 

He had half a mind to go to her and smooth her hair for her. But he remained where he was, instead merely staring at her, at her shaking hands, and noticing yet again that she had turned entirely away from the jewel resting at her feet. "Whose face?" he asked, feeling as if he spoke too loudly.

            She turned her head a bit toward him at his question and she wrapped her arms even more tightly around herself. But she did not answer his question, her eyes focusing on something close to him. He stared at her, wishing she could just _speak_, but she did not.

            The silence in the room was deafening. He couldn't stand it.

            Inuyasha looked toward the window, his face pinched. "You're going further," he whispered.

            Kagome frowned faintly and she lifted her eyes to him.

            The hanyou shook his head almost imperceptibly, his eyes downcast, his face turned to the moonlight. "There are times when I feel you and I are so close. And then there are times when I can't touch you at all, you're so far away."

            Kagome stared at him wordlessly.

            With a sigh Inuyasha turned his head back once more, readjusting Tetsusaiga against his shoulder. "The day that youkai attacked you, I felt a coldness…in my heart. A strange coldness. I've never felt anything like it."

            _The youkai. Again. It seems every time something is wrong with me that you don't understand, you automatically think it has to do with that youkai…_

            The voice came unbidden, her own voice, inside her head. She gazed at Inuyasha, at the way the moonlight couldn't seem to reach him, casting him in such dark shadow. How sad he seemed.

            "But you were all right after. And I was happy." And he met her eyes then, cold amber glittering in the shadow. Making him look dangerous. "But you're not all right, are you?"

            She felt a shiver pass through her, gazing into his eyes.

            _I haven't been all right for so long. I feel such anger, and such fear. And such responsibility to the jewel, it's so much…_

            "You don't even look like yourself anymore. Your skin is pale. Your eyes…they're almost dead. And you're so quiet, always wanting to be off by yourself. Crying-"

            _And I see her everywhere I look. Her face. And it never mattered so much before because you and I were together. Even though you told me once that nothing could ever happen between us, because you felt like you owed her.  You felt you would betray her memory. And instead, you betray mine-_

            "And the nightmares. That's what they are, that's what you woke up from when I came to you. You'd been gone for so _long-"_

            _And I can't even tell the difference between dream and reality. I think I'm living in the world but the world can never be as beautiful as my dreams. It can only be as ugly as my nightmares._

            "We all worried because you were gone and days passed, into weeks even. It's why I came, to see if you were all right-"

            _For all I know this is another dream. I'm sitting here with you and it could just be another dream. But no, this is reality, because you aren't holding me in your arms and telling me I'm the one you love-_

            "This is reality…" she whispered.

            Inuyasha was silent for a moment. And then, "What?"

            _It was my fault. From the beginning. The well, the Shikon no Tama inside me. Setting you free. Falling in love with you when you were never even mine to have-_

            She closed her eyes tightly, the voice so painful in her head.

            "Kagome."

            _She was right. When you were making love to her, she was right. It's all my fault. I would have saved myself so much trouble, so much heartache…_

            She lifted her hands to head, closing them into fists, and she tried to muffle the voice in her head. Silence it, even though it was right. She didn't want it to be right. She didn't want to see it for what it was, what the voice told her it was.

            There was a soft rustling close by that she ignored.

            _Now everything is wrong. The whole world is wrong. For letting me travel through time to see you, for putting you in my path but not allowing me to reach you. For allowing there to be a way to revive a dead priestess, and for allowing me to have her soul. We have the same soul! Why can't you look at me and see me as the woman you loved? And why can't you use my name instead of hers when you look at my face?_

            His clawed hands gripped her wrists tightly and he forced her hands from her face, shaking her furiously. "Kagome!"

            _Why is it so cruel?_

            He shook her again, snarling at her. "Enough! Look at me! Just me! And listen to what I'm saying to you!"

            She opened her eyes into slits to see his angry face, his flashing amber eyes. And she was only reminded of her first nightmare, when he had violated her, all in _her_ name. She stared, tears rising and blurring his image, but he seemed unfazed, his claws digging into her wrists.

            "Listen to me and _see_ me! For once, _see_ me!" he shouted.

            _Yes._

            She gazed at him, wincing as he shook her, as he yelled at her. And she said, "But it's the other way around…"

            He paused for a moment, confusion on his face.

            _See me…_

            "What is _wrong_ with you?" he demanded, teeth gleaming in the moonlight. He rose to his feet, dragging her struggling figure with him and as she got to her feet he shook her again, as if to shake sense into her. "You're going to wither away and _die_ at this rate, is that what you want? Don't you care _at all?_" 

            _I've cared too much up to this point…_

            She bowed her head, hiding her face in her hair, and he merely stared at her for a small moment, his eyes wide. And then, with a heart wrenching breath, he pulled her close, embracing her to his chest. She found herself crushed to him, her head against his collar, and his scent hovering around her. And it was the most beautiful feeling in the world, to be embraced by him. She hesitated momentarily, feeling his arms enveloping her and with a sniffled sob she took hold of his haori, taking fistfuls and pulling him to her just as tightly. 

            "It's too much for you," he whispered sadly against her hair, his breath warm. "It should never have fallen to you. And it's better if the Shikon no Tama was never put together again. The world won't be any better with it in shards but it can't get worse either."

            Kagome listened to his words vibrate inside, into her. That soft growl he always had underlying his voice. 

            "And, if it remains in shards…there will be no other reason for you to be in my time."

            _What?_

            She stilled in his embrace, her eyes coming open against his chest.

            He didn't say anything else for a long while, seemingly content to run his claws through her hair and hold her to him. She watched the hand move, smoothing her hair to the ends and then lifting to start at her crown once more.

            "You…don't want me to come back," she murmured, her voice muffled.

            He sighed, his hand slowing. "That isn't it, Kagome," he said to her.

            Hesitantly, she pulled her head away from him, noticing he allowed her but his arm did not leave her waist from where it had wound around, nor did his hand release a lock of her thick hair. His amber eyes were mournful but firm, his face solemn as she looked into it. She looked from one slit iris to the other, her own dark eyes apprehensive. "Then what is it?" she asked him.

            _I don't want to hear this…_

            He gazed at her, inhaling. And his clawed hand allowed her hair to slip through his fingers as he brought them close to her face. "I can't have you there anymore," he said quietly. And she went to speak, her eyes widening, but he shushed her gently, his fingers dropping to her mouth. "I thought I could always protect you, Kagome. I thought I could always be there to save you, but I know differently now. I can't be there always. And seeing you, like this, makes me believe it even more."

            She stared at him, feeling a coldness inside.

            "To have you return would only make…whatever this is, even more powerful. But if you stay here and return to the life you had before, in time you will forget. You'll live your life again, with no fear of ever being attacked by a youkai. No fear of not being able to sense a Shikon no kakera. You'll have your life again the way it was-"

            "I don't want it!" she cried, cutting him off. "I don't want to go back to the life I had before I met you! I want to stay with you-"

            _I've always wanted to stay with you. It's just that you've never wanted to stay with me._

            He shook his head at her as she spoke, his amber eyes dropping away.

            "And I won't! I won't go back to the way it was, I _can't_! And you can't make me, Inuyasha. No matter how hard you try. No matter what you do!" And as he continued to shake his head she paused uncertainly only for a moment before taking his face in her hands and pulling him to her. His eyes widened for a split second and then she was kissing him, her mouth pressed to his intimately. 

            The kiss was awkward at first, Inuyasha stiff in her embrace. She held him almost frantically, wishing him to understand what she wanted, what she was trying to get through to him. And then, slowly, he exhaled against her and his hands lifted to her face, her neck, the same way she held him. Her heart saddened as she saw the two of them for what they were. Two lonely people clinging to each other almost desperately. But she didn't want him to see it the same way. She didn't want him to ever be lonely again, not the way he had been growing up. So lonely.

            His mouth broke from hers for a moment, his forehead pressing to hers as he exhaled tremulously. She opened her eyes slightly, her vision blurred and his own eyes were closed, his breathing a bit too rapid. 

            _Is this…real?_

            Inuyasha lifted his face once more, and she was sure the gesture had been to pull away but his mouth came too close and she raised her face as well, meeting his lips again, hearing a groan escape him breathlessly.

            _I'm scared. I'm scared, I'm scared, I'm scared…_

            Her lips parted under his and he was wary, hesitant, in reaching to taste her with his tongue. She stood still, unmoving, as the tip of his tongue passed over her bottom lip, as he kissed her just a bit more hungrily. His hand floated back to her face, his clawed fingers pressing to her cheek and jaw lightly, and he tilted her head back a bit to deepen the kiss. 

            _This is real. This is real. Isn't it? Please, let this be real…_

            His other hand lifted and wound around her waist, urging her closer to him, his arm lean and strong against the small of her back. She found herself arching backward over his arm, one hand to his chest, the other clinging to his shoulder tremulously. And his breath was warm against her skin, his mouth parting from hers only to come and claim her once more in a caress that was even more frenetic than the last. She was sure she didn't understand what was going on. She had never been kissed, much less kissed like this before. And the only other time she had kissed anyone it had been him but she had scared him just as much as she had been scared herself. But now, now he seemed as desperate as she was, desperate for that one kiss and then for the next, and another before having to break. This was not the time for words, not as she felt his hand open achingly against the base of her spine, the hand on her cheek becoming possessive. A whimper broke from her as his tongue brushed hers, as he fought for more of her. One more taste.

            Her lips were freed for a moment as he broke his kiss, his mouth trailing away from hers, his teeth nipping at her sensitive skin playfully. She faltered for a moment, caught in his embrace, and she whispered softly, "Inuyasha…"

            He responded with a low growl directly in her ear, and her knees melted under her as his tongue passed over her pulse, his mouth hot against the skin of her neck. 

            _See me. See me. See me…_

            Her hands lifted to his haori and she hesitated, halfway through pulling it loose from his lean frame. He stayed her hands, instead taking them in his and pressing them to his chest, to his heart where it pounded fiercely. And she listened to it, matched it to her own for it beat just as intensely. But it wasn't enough, it wouldn't be enough to keep him. It never was.

            She pulled her hands away, pulling his with hers, and she placed them at her waist, urging him to take hold of her shirt. And she felt him stiffen, breathing hoarsely in her ear as he pulled his head back a bit. She turned her face to his, insistent, using her hands to guide his, and slowly her shirt was pulled free of her skirt.

            It was then that he pulled away, his shoulders heaving, his hands taking a firm hold of her wrists and staying them. "Kagome, matte-"

            She shook her head, panic welling inside of her.

            _Don't say no, don't say no. Please, no-_

            He lifted his head, taking one deep breath to calm his racing heart and he finally looked at her, his gaze half wondrous, half tender. All words seemed to have left him as he continued to stare at her, his tongue passing over his lips, and she found her eyes drawn to them as he did so. 

            _You're beautiful._

            She closed her eyes and leaned into him once more. And he took the same moment to take a single step back, away from her and out of her embrace. She found herself staggering a bit, caught off guard, and his eyes were apologetic as she looked into them once more in confusion. 

            "N…nani?"

            He shook his head slowly at her. "We can't do this…" he whispered to her and in the silence of the night it was almost too loud. 

            Kagome felt her heart drop out from under her.

            _No. You don't **want **to do this…_

            "There are so many things…and this isn't…we can't-"

            _There's only one thing and her name is Kikyo._

            "It isn't right, especially not right now. Not with everything being the way it is and not with you being like this…"

            _It won't ever be right, especially not between you and I…_

            "If I start this now, I won't let go and I _have_ to let go. I can't have you by my side suffering, withering away-"

            _Getting in the way..._

            His eyes were so soft as he spoke to her and she only realized then that she hadn't actually paid him any attention. Every sentence that had fallen from his lips had been rearranged, twisted by the voice in her head. Even then, as he continued to murmur to her, all she saw was the movement of his lips but she heard nothing through the din of white noise.

            "And I'm realizing now, slowly, that I was right from the beginning. You and I aren't here for each other. We shouldn't be here at all, not in the same time much less the same room," he whispered and his hand rose to her face as he spoke, his skin soft against hers. "I was right when I said that you should stay here and live your life. This whole…" he searched for the word as he motioned around the room, motioned to the both of them, "_thing_ only proves it-"

            She grimaced as he spoke, feeling pain deep inside. "Why are you saying this?" she asked faintly.

            He straightened, his face firm yet sorrowful. "Because… I'm right. In this, I'm right-"

            _"Chigai!"_ she cried frantically and she took hold of his haori, pulling him and trying to make him understand. "Inuyasha, you're wrong! Please, I can't go back to what I lived before, I can't! Too much has happened and I can't go back-"

            He shook his head still, his eyes closing.

            "Inuyasha!" she shouted even though he stood before her silently. A bit of anger rose in her as she understood that his mind was made up, that he had made up his mind for the both of them. "You can't decide this for me! You can't decide what kind of life I lead, what kind of life I _choose_ to lead! If I decide I'm going back with you then I'm going back. And you can't stop it from-"

            He pulled away from her suddenly, making her break off in mid-sentence, and she caught only a glimpse of him as he moved, as he stooped beside the bed. And then he rose and he held the Shikon no Tama in his hand, his face dark.

            She stared at him, feeling that coldness she had felt inside before suddenly swirl into an icy uprising. "Inuyasha-"

            Wordlessly he closed his fingers around it and he darted passed her, a sudden blur of red and silver. 

            "Inuyasha!" she cried, her shout going hoarse as he hesitated by the window. 

            He looked at her, one foot up on the windowsill. And he had his head bowed to his fist, his expression pained. "No matter how you remember it, Kagome…" he said softly, his voice faint in the night, "know that I did it for you."

            And he pushed himself off, out the window into the moonlight. With a cry she threw herself at the window, her heart in her throat.

            _He's going to trap me here. He's going to trap me here! And he's going to go back to her! With the Shikon no Tama!_

            "Inuyasha!" she shrieked, stopping at the window and watching him as he flew down to the ground, as he sprang forth lithely, heading for the shrine. The well. Frantically, she pulled away from the window and went to her closet, shoving open the doors and reaching inside blindly. Her hand closed around a wooden shaft and she yanked, pulling out exactly what she needed. And she returned to the window, shouting, _"Inuyasha, yamero!"_

            He floated down to a stop and whirled, his fist clenched at his side and his eyes widened as he saw the bow and arrow in her hand, her firm stance.

            She aimed. 

            _Just say it. It's easier, especially if he tries to run. Osuwari. Osuwari, osuwari, osuwari!_

            He stared at her, a small cool breeze lifting his silver hair as he gazed at her from so far away. And she stared back, aiming down the arrow, aiming for his heart.

            _Familiar, Inuyasha? You'll be seeing down the shaft of this arrow before you leave me trapped here. Before I allow you to go back to her-_

            With a pained look he turned away and walked up the stairs of the shrine. As if waiting for her arrow to strike him. Her eyes widened, her grip tightening on the bow, but he still walked, his fire rat haori floating behind his lean frame.

            _Don't. Don't go. Don't go! Don't leave me! Not for her!_

            And then he was inside the shrine and she hadn't shot off the arrow. She stared, her frame trembling, and she hadn't shot off the arrow. And now he was gone, forever.

            _Itsumo…_

            "What have you done?" Sango asked, her eyes wide as Inuyasha held out the Shikon no Tama on his palm. Beside her, Miroku winced and sat up gingerly, his chest swathed with bandages. 

            Kaede rose slowly from where she had been kneeling and her face was firm but downhearted as she looked at the shard pieces illuminated by the fire. With a sigh she turned her face away, long red skirt dragging as she walked back across the wood floor to where Miroku was heaving wearily. 

            "Is it permanent this time?" she asked in her scratchy voice.

            Inuyasha nodded wordlessly.

            And Shippo leaped to his feet with a sudden outburst of sound. "No! Now why? What happened this time?"

            "Shippo-" Sango said quietly.

            "You always get mad at her! And you already did this once!" the Kitsune shouted angrily, red hair sticking up, his small fists clenched. "Just go back and apologize! She won't be mad at you-"

            "I'm not going back for her!" Inuyasha snarled at him, effectively shutting him up. He glared, a dangerous rumble running through his frame as the small fox demon returned the anger. "She's staying in her time and that's final!"

            Sango looked downhearted, Miroku slowly rising and coming forward to stand beside her. "Was it, at least, an amicable parting?" he questioned quietly.

            Inuyasha glared for a moment longer at the fox demon before turning his back on the group, his frame stiff. "No, it was not…" he replied just as softly. And without another word he left the small room, long silver hair floating.

Ok anyways, thank you guys for your reviews and hope you all are still hanging on. It's about time that there started being a few cameos from Inuyasha characters (other than the usual Inuyasha group) so that's going to happen from here on in. ;)

Check out my site on my profile and sign the guestbook!

-Cassie


	9. Sento

_Sento:_

            The new moon had arrived and gone and he watched the sun rise, his black hair fading to silver, dark eyes turning amber once more. It was a cool morning against his flushed skin and he sniffed the air gently, eyes closed.

            He missed her scent.

            Shippo was still angry. Even after weeks had passed, the small fox demon was as furious as the moment when Inuyasha had left her. And Miroku and Sango had given up trying to change his feelings toward the hanyou. He was angry, and angry he would remain.

            He could only guess as to how Kagome was.

            He opened his hand and looked down to see the Shikon no Tama nestled there. It glowed faintly, a purple pink swirl but with a darkness. Since she had left, perhaps a bit before, he had noticed that darkness in the jewel and it frightened him now. Such a brilliant glow but with the small mist of blackness in its core, swirling about threateningly. He didn't understand it. And his expression hardened the more he stared at it. Such a pain the jewel had been, since the beginning. It had brought him Kikyo. It had brought him Kagome. Only to take them both in the end. And it had yet to grant him either mortality or immortality. He lifted his eyes once more, fingers closing around the jewel possessively.

            _I'll guard it for you, Kagome. I'll keep it safe._

            He exhaled, chest falling, and only with his next breath did he catch the scent. His eyes narrowed, a frown furrowing his brow as he searched the area. He saw nothing but he smelled it coming from everywhere. 

            Youkai were nearby, a large amount of them, and they were all heading directly for him.

            Miroku was already standing when he joined them back in the village. He cast a quick glance at the hanyou and nodded, relieved to see him in half-demon form once more. "They are coming…" he said quietly.

            Beside him Sango already had her extermination gear on, lifting the bone boomerang to her shoulder. She stared out toward the morning sun as it rose and her figure was stiff, her eyes hard. "It's almost impossible not to sense…" she whispered and she looked toward the both of them. "Why are they coming?"

            Inuyasha did not answer. He didn't know what he could have said to her. He didn't know why there were so many coming, only that they _were_, and he was wary, his skin prickling. At his side Tetsusaiga seemed to pulse and he lifted his hand to the hilt readily. And not for the first time was he relieved Kagome was not with them.

            "Kirara," Sango called and floating down silently came the large feline beast, flame springing about his powerful form. Shippo rode on his back and his face was not happy. The creature touched down and promptly shrunk, looking as adorable as a stuffed animal and Shippo bounced off.

"There's a whole slew of them coming!" he cried to his group, easily ignoring Inuyasha. 

            "What's a whole slew?" Inuyasha demanded, becoming angry. He had been jumping to anger a whole lot more over the passed few weeks, especially around the fox demon and he would be damned before he let a worrisome little creature like the Kitsune get the upper hand.

            "It doesn't matter," Miroku cut him off and his jaw was clenched as he lifted his head back the way Shippo and Kirara had come. "If it is enough to sense…"

            "That's not the half of it," Shippo said slowly, cautiously, and all of them looked down at him as he hesitated. The Kitsune turned his gaze on Inuyasha and this time there was no anger, only dread. "They're following Kikyo."

            She stared down into the darkness of the well, eyes heavy. Such a deep darkness, leading so far down. She had been sitting in the blackness of the shrine for so long that her eyes had adjusted and now all she could do was stare at the floor of the well. Alone.

            Had the new moon arrived yet? Had Inuyasha gone through his transformation already? Had Inuyasha completed the Shikon no Tama? 

            Was Inuyasha now full demon?

            She stared blankly into nothingness. It felt like years had passed, an eternity. And still the sun rose and the sun set, and still she was alone. Her hand lifted to her neck only to find the Shikon no Tama missing. Still. Beside her rested her bow and arrow and every time she looked at it she felt a shiver course through her. She had threatened Inuyasha with that. Just as Kikyo had, so long ago. In the end, was she really any better than Kikyo?

            Her homework went unattended. And she had taken so many days off, had cut so many classes, always to sit beside the well and stare into its black nothingness.

            _I am withering away. I am going to die like this, horribly. In so much pain. Why does it hurt so much..?_

            There was a faint noise outside and she looked up before quickly crawling around to the other side of the well and hiding herself there in the well's shadow. Her mother had been looking for her for some time and she had yet to tell her that the Shikon no Tama was no longer on her person. She hugged her knees to her chest and made herself small as the shrine doors opened quietly.

            "Kagome? Are you here?" her mother's voice called. And upon not hearing her daughter reply she slowly slid the doors shut once more. 

            Kagome listened to her mother's retreating footsteps for a moment before exhaling and slowly releasing her knees. What a shameful thing, to lose possession of the jewel. What would her mother say to that? How disappointed would she be in her daughter? She closed her eyes slowly, feeling sadness inside.

            _I really am useless after all…_

            And she slowly stood once more and seated herself at the edge of the well to look down into its blackness once more.

            Inuyasha stood upon the branch of the tree, smelling Sango several branches away and waiting expectantly. Down below, standing firmly although cautiously, stood Miroku. He barred the way to the village by himself, standing resolutely between the trees, his staff at the ready. His wound had not fully healed but he moved now as if there had never been a wound to begin with. Inuyasha wondered how long that small deception would hold. Behind him, on one last branch waited Shippo with Kirara. And that was the group of them. One small group to hold off the youkai, although he was not sure the village was even the reason the youkai came. He lifted a hand to his chest, feeling the Shikon no Tama where it rested there, right beside the cursed necklace that Kagome had put on him.

            Over the hill, in the blinding sunlight, came Kikyo. He gazed at her as she neared, his heart beating painfully. She was still beautiful and his heart still swelled whenever he saw her. Whenever he thought of everything that had happened and of everything that could have been. But then he remembered once more that things had transpired the way they had for a certain reason.

            Although at the moment, that reason was unclear to him. Especially with Kagome trapped in her world.

            And then, behind Kikyo, came the small army of youkai. His frame stiffened a bit as he counted quickly and, for a moment, he saw that they were not the most powerful of demons. But they would be a handful with Miroku still healing and Kagome absent. He raised his head haughtily as the priestess approached, refusing to allow truth to shine through.

            Within moments she had reached them, walking silently, her face dark.

            Miroku lifted his head as she came to stop before them and her legion of demons came to a halt not too far behind her. "You have no reason to be here, White Priestess," he said to her quietly.

            She looked at him, sizing him up, and around her floated the soul stealers she associated herself with. Her dark eyes shifted to the trees and rested on Sango who waited stonily, her boomerang at her shoulder. Looking to the side a bit her gaze came to Shippo and Kirara, and moving one last time she saw the red of Inuyasha's fire rat haori. "On the contrary, I have every reason to be here," she replied finally.

            Miroku straightened a bit more. "I only ask for one, then," he said.

            The miko smiled faintly and her eyes had not left Inuyasha. "I sense the Shikon no Tama. In the possession of one not qualified to care for it."

            Inuyasha stiffened as she spoke, his arms crossed over his chest.

            "I've come to claim it."

            "You?" Sango bit out and her fist clenched at her side. "You are even less capable of protecting it. And your army of youkai only proves it."

            Kikyo's eyes hardened a bit as the exterminator spoke but she was still focused on Inuyasha. "I came today, in the morning sun, because I knew what last night was," she said to him in a menacing whisper. "The Shikon no Tama is not safe in the hands of a hanyou. It needs the care of a miko. And I see that you have misplaced yours." And she searched the trees although by the look on her face it was obvious she knew she would not find Kagome.

            Inuyasha slowly lowered his hands and one went to the hilt of the Tetsusaiga. "The Shikon no Tama is no longer yours, Kikyo," he said to her quietly, but firmly. And he bit down the sorrow he felt inside, blocking it away. Kagome would not want her to have it, he knew. And even if it killed him he would carry out every one of Kagome's wishes as if she were there still. "I think you should go now, while we are still on speaking terms."

            Kikyo came a step closer to him, looking up at him with a withering look. She sidestepped Miroku and the monk turned his head to follow her movement but did not leave his position. 

            "Do you really think yourself noble for caring for the jewel?" she asked him questioningly. "Do you really believe it to be safe? Or will you use it in the end for your own means?" Her expression hardened as she gazed at him. "I recall a time when you wanted that jewel for yourself, to become a full demon. Have your ideals really changed since then? Do you think you're fooling anyone?"

            Inuyasha bit down a reply.

            And she continued on, frame stiffening. "You've lost your means, Inuyasha. You can't sense the Shikon no kakera. And even now, as we stand here, the jewel is turning black." And she smiled at him as his eyes widened, as his group looked at him, Miroku whirling with a frown on his face. "You were not meant to have it. No one here is meant to have it." She looked at Miroku over her shoulder. "You, with your anger over the Kazaana." To Sango, "You, with your anger over your broken family and village." And then her eyes came to Shippo who bristled under her gaze. "Do I even need to say anything toward you?" she questioned.

            Shippo growled under his breath.

            "I come for the jewel," she said to them as a group, stepping back once more and looking at them all in turn. "It is the only reason and I come prepared to take it-"

            "Prepared to take it?" Sango asked haughtily. "Does that make you any better than a youkai in the end?"

            The priestess shrugged gracefully. "It was mine to begin with."

            "And you passed it along," Inuyasha barked, frame tensing. This was going to erupt and he was ready for it. "Now it is with me. And I'm warning you one more time, Kikyo, get out of the way of my blade…or fall under it."

            Miroku looked at Inuyasha quickly before lifting his staff in his hand and taking a ready stance. In the trees Sango glared, Shippo hopping up into Kirara's back.

            Kikyo's eyes narrowed. "Our alliance ends here, then," she whispered to him and she suddenly ducked away from Miroku, shouting, _*"Shine!"_

            Inuyasha lifted his eyes to the army of youkai to see them charge, barreling forth in a mass of swarming darkness. Below him, Miroku jumped forward, swinging his staff expertly, the small rings chiming together as he swung. To his side he caught a quick glimpse of Sango as she shouted, "Kirara!" and then she was hurling the bone boomerang, throwing herself at the large beige feline as he came flying toward her.

            The boomerang cut through several youkai as it spun through the air, hanging and returning. It was a threatening sight, to see the weapon return, but astride Kirara's back the exterminator fearlessly held up a hand and caught it effortlessly, Shippo hanging onto her for dear life.

            Inuyasha nodded inside. This wouldn't be too hard. Lips pulling back from his sharp teeth he threw himself into the air, pulling Tetsusaiga from its sheath. _"Kaze no Kizu!"_ he shouted, his voice hoarse with anger. He brought his sword down as he fell and pure yellow light burst from his sword, striking the ground and streaking outward toward the mass of youkai.

            To the side Kikyo dove away and she pulled forth her bow and arrow.

            "Inuyasha!" Miroku shouted and he lunged for the priestess, swinging his staff.

            Kikyo pulled back away from his strike and with a cry she fired an arrow in Inuyasha's direction, instantly going for a second. 

            Inuyasha's frame stiffened momentarily and then he turned his body, barely dodging the arrow as it sailed passed his shoulder in a glowing blur. He managed a quick exhalation before facing them once more and a youkai suddenly came down on him, throwing him to the ground.

            A cry came from Kikyo and she stumbled under Miroku's staff, her second shot firing and going wide.

            Above them Sango batted away even more youkai, swinging her boomerang, Kirara's sleek form biting down on creatures and tearing off limbs. Shippo hid behind the exterminator, ducking his head as flames and boomerangs swung over his red head.

            Inuyasha bit back a growl, bucking his frame and setting his attacker off balance. The hideous creature shrieked furiously, stumbling, and thoughtlessly, Inuyasha swung the Tetsusaiga, tearing a gash straight through the beast's chest and stomach. Black blood instantly sprayed and the demon writhed, convulsing as he fell to the floor.

            A third arrow flew and this time he felt it tear into his shoulder. Only with it there was a moment of déjà vu as the arrowhead stabbed clear through the chain holding the Shikon no Tama around his neck. He hesitated for a moment, a hand having lifted to it, but he saw it again in his mind as it had happened that first time. The jewel flew from between his clawed fingers as it had flown before, as he was forced backward by the arrow, and he watched it as it sailed through the air, gleaming. 

            Kikyo batted Miroku with her bow, catching him in the chest and he instantly fell away, clutching his wound with a grimace.

            Inuyasha fell to the ground, his chest heaving painfully around the arrow lodged in his shoulder. And he watched as youkai and human alike raced toward the Shikon no Tama, all of them a blur of movement.

            A vague impression of a redheaded child reached the jewel first and he stared, the world slow as Sango shouted to the Kitsune fearfully, _"Shippo-chan! Nigero!"_

            The fox demon looked up at her and then at the approaching youkai only for a moment. Then, not needing to be told twice, he whirled and raced off back toward the village but keeping left, fleeing.

            Inuyasha looked toward Sango and Miroku as they all watched the Kitsune run. And then as one they nodded. Sango was the first to move, barring the way Shippo had taken, and she shot off her bone boomerang, crying, _"Hiraikotsu!"_

            The boomerang sliced through youkai flesh, ripping and tearing as it flew, and coming up beside her Miroku threw forth several pieces of paper, shouting incantations and halting demons in mid-stride. "Inuyasha!" 

            Inuyasha nodded as he rose weakly to his feet and before him stood Kikyo, another arrow aimed at him.

            "It belongs to me!" she shouted at him angrily and she let loose the arrow, her hair flying with the gesture.

            The hanyou caught it in mid-swipe, a growl running through his frame. "This gets old, Kikyo," he snarled, snapping the glowing arrow in two. With a low rumble he took the arrow embedded in his shoulder and ripped it out, breaking that one as well with a single hand. "I thought after so many years you would have this out of your system."

            She glared, lowering her bow a bit as she reached behind herself for another yet. "For the likes of you, Inuyasha, I always need to be prepared…"

            He chuckled inwardly. "And they say the love is gone…"

            She armed the bow once more, pointing at him. "Get out of the way," she whispered in a ghostly breath.

            He straightened slowly, cautiously, gazing at her. And in the air he felt a thickness, a sudden foreshadowing, and he fought the urge to glance back over his shoulder in the direction Shippo had taken. To the side came the sounds of battle, still, and he knew Sango and Miroku had their hands full. But the creature who threatened the jewel the most stood before him and he would be damned before he let her get a chance at the jewel again. "You know I can't do that, Kikyo," he said to her softly. "You also know that the jewel is no longer yours to care for. You gave it up when you died, when you allowed it to be born in another body. And there is no going back to claim it."

            The priestess' hand did not waver. "I said, get out of the way," she hissed.

            Inuyasha slowly shook his head at her and he bowed his head, coming forth to stand directly before her. Her eyes widened as he stopped on the other side of her pointed arrow and he placed the tip to his chest, to his heart. Gazing at her sadly, he said, "It can't hurt more than it does already."

            She frowned at him, her grip loosening slightly. And her lips parted suddenly, eyes large in fear as he felt something tear into his back. He faltered, staggering forward, and the next moment he was overcome by a youkai, falling under the immense weight.

            Shippo came to a stop before the well, his heart beating painfully. Behind him were the sounds of youkai, slithering, running, lunging, and he threw himself to the ground, fighting for a breath. They had followed him the entire way, and only his nimble agility and small frame had kept him ahead of them, out of their reach. But now, as he came upon the well he found himself trembling. What had he been thinking? Had he really thought being in possession of the Shikon no Tama would save him? He fell to his knees, breathing hoarsely, the jewel caught in his fist.

            Behind him came the low growl of a youkai and he only had to hear its rumbling tone to know that this was a game for him. They weren't even tired. The Kitsune bowed his head as he caught a single breath and he slowly looked over his shoulder to see the group of demons that had managed to make it passed Sango, Miroku and Inuyasha. He prayed they were still alive.

            The youkai behind him slowly, lazily, came forth, his clawed hands clenching into fists. He spoke something in his language, a mixture of squeals and grunts, and Shippo didn't have to understand the language to know what he meant. After he had the jewel he would be dinner for the youkai.

            Which was fine. If he were getting the Shikon no Tama.

            With a cry the Kitsune lifted his head and flung the jewel with all his might.

            The Shikon no Tama gleamed in the morning sun as if flew, sparkling and shining light and darkness. Darkness. Shippo's eyes widened as he watched it float. She had been right, the priestess. The Shikon no Tama was slowly being corrupted.

            And then the jewel fell into the well, vanishing, and he did not hear it hit the ground.

            Behind him the youkai screamed as one, shrieks and yells deafening him, and the demon behind him suddenly took hold of him by the tail, hoisting him into the air to face him. Shippo looked at the demon upside down, trembling, as the creature breathed hot, noxious fumes into his face. He said something more, in a low guttural tone, and his clawed fingers wrapped around the Kitsune's neck, hard enough to crush bone. Shippo winced, his air cut off, and he writhed, flailing furiously.

            "That's as far as you go," came Kagome's voice from behind. And Shippo had no time to even turn to look before a glowing arrow of light suddenly lodged itself in the youkai's forehead. For a moment he stood upright, his tone cut off in mid-shout. And then the light gleamed powerfully, bursting out and blinding the mass of youkai, and Shippo found himself going down with the youkai. He hit the ground, rolling out of the demon's grip and, on the rim of the well, stood Kagome, light and color surrounding her form.

            "Kagome…" Shippo whispered, gazing up at her.

            A small commotion came behind them and Inuyasha burst from the forest. His eyes widened, breath leaving him as he stared at her. He was stained with blood, his it seemed, Tetsusaiga in his hand. And at his side appeared Kikyo, heaving for a breath, clutching her bow.

            Kagome lifted her head to the two of them, a look of understanding crossing her face.

            _I knew it._

            "Kagome-" Inuyasha uttered, Miroku and Sango coming up overhead in the sky, riding Kirara.

            A youkai burst from the group, lunging toward Kagome, and she whirled to face him, recoiling in surprise.

            _"Kagome!"_

            Taking two steps Inuyasha dove, the Tetsusaiga raised over his head. He came down on the creature as it reached the foot of the well and they both went down, Tetsusaiga driven into the creature's back to the hilt. A high pitched shriek broke from the demon but Inuyasha ignored it, looking up at her from where he crouched at her feet.

            _"Get out of here!"_ he ordered furiously. And then, shaking his head, "What are you doing here to begin with?"

            Wordlessly, looking down at him, she lifted her hand. And the Shikon no Tama dangled from her fingers, throwing dancing lights.

            Inuyasha stared in confusion for only a moment before whirling to face Shippo.

            _"Kagome-chan!"_ came Sango's cry suddenly. And a single arrow flew, brilliant with white light, and lodging itself in Kagome's chest. 

            For a moment she stared in disbelief, the jewel hanging from her hand, her bow gripped loosely, limply, in her free hand.

            "Kagome…" Inuyasha whispered, eyes widening slowly.

            She looked at him slowly, her face confused, and then, bit by bit, she slipped. With a growl he hopped onto the well, throwing one arm around her waist and heaving her up onto his shoulder before hopping down the other side.

            And from above came the sudden pull of wind.

            Shippo threw himself quickly around the well to sit beside Inuyasha as the Kazaana was opened, Miroku's face firm from where he held onto Sango on Kirara's back. Inuyasha glanced over his shoulder, looking through the black winds to see a youkai fly, swallowed by the black hole in the monk's palm, followed by another. Sniffing, he turned his attention back to Kagome draped over his frame, and he lifted a hand to her chest as blood flowed down her white shirt, staining it crimson. She seemed unconscious on him, the jewel tangled in her fingers.

            Behind them arrow after blinding white arrow was fired, demons shrieking as they were swallowed by the Kazaana. Slowly putting Kagome down Inuyasha stood a bit to look for Kikyo, seeing her in the midst of the battlefield, firing arrow upon arrow. Above, Miroku was consuming most and those that went wide were batted away by Sango swinging her bone boomerang.

            Shippo peeked around Inuyasha, tail twitching. "He's getting rid of them…"

            Inuyasha nodded, staring at Kikyo.

            The priestess lowered her bow, hair flying about her face and watching as Kirara floated a bit and then came in closer, facing the priestess directly. Kikyo's eyes narrowed and then, wordlessly, she looked toward Inuyasha, passed him. With a tightening to her jaw she whirled and fled, long skirt flowing behind her slender frame.

            "Kikyo!" Inuyasha shouted over the roar of the Kazaana.

            She ignored him and ran, bursting through trees and vanishing into the woods. Behind her, the remainder of the youkai were pulled from the ground, yanked backwards and into the black hole. 

            Sango leaned into Miroku and said something to him and after a moment he nodded, clenching his fingers into a fist and winding the chain about it to stopper it. 

            Silence fell, leaves floating to the ground, trees settling. And Inuyasha was left staring after Kikyo, Tetsusaiga hanging limply in his hand. Beside him Shippo came out fully, looking up toward Sango and Miroku. 

            "Daijobu, hoshi-sama?" Sango asked the monk and he nodded, clutching his chest, which had a suspicious dark stain widening. 

            Shippo whirled around, his face suddenly worried. "Kagome-" and he broke off.

            Inuyasha turned as well, jaw clenching, and where Kagome had been was only a stain of bright red blood and drops that left a trail toward the other side of the forest. He stiffened, chest tightening and he took a step to follow.

            "Inuyasha-" Miroku called to him and he looked up at him, an angry frown on his face. The monk stared at him, calmly. "Stow your anger. Just find her."

            With a curt nod the hanyou whirled once more and raced off, the smell of Kagome's blood in his nostrils.

            _I knew it. I knew it. I knew it…_

            She fell again, clutching the arrow lodged in her chest, and she hunched in on herself, sobbing silently. Her other hand clutched her bow and her fingers tightened on it, her hand trembling. 

            _I knew it…_

            How long had she really known? Not suspected, but truthfully known? For a long time now, and she leaned forward even more, feeling as if her chest were ripping apart under the strain of her beating heart. For so long. Her forehead touched the wet grass, cool against her skin, and she felt her tears drop, could almost hear them bounce off the grass blades, off the dew drops.

            Further ahead came the insistent sound of rushing water and, blindly, she lifted herself to her feet, staggering forward. She could use the cold water, splash some on her face, and cleanse the wound. But she didn't have the physical strength to rip the arrow from her chest. It seemed that all strength in her arm had left her, leaving behind limpness. She almost faltered again, stumbling, but she maintained her path, heading for the source of the water.

            Behind her she was sure she suddenly heard the sound of brush and trees being shoved aside, punched through. And she looked behind her quickly, fearfully. One of two things could be after her. Kikyo. And Inuyasha.

            And she suddenly feared the latter more than the former.

            Her foot slipped and she faced forward once more, a cry breaking from her mouth as she found herself looking over the edge of a cliff, the water rushing in a river below.

            _No. No, no, no!_

            More brush was thrust aside and with it came the sound of footsteps and she hesitated, terrified. She couldn't see him, not then, and there was no way she could protect herself against Kikyo. Even with the Shikon no Tama in her possession, she didn't know how to utilize it, not even to protect herself. 

            She looked forward once more, her blood spilling to the dirt and grass, staining them.

            _It's such a drop. I'll die…but then…would I really hurt the way I hurt now..?_

            The sounds came closer. And she stilled, looking down at the drop and feeling a sudden calm come over her. 

            _Nothing can hurt the way I hurt now…_

            Closing her eyes she inhaled deeply, reaching into her pocket to clutch the Shikon no Tama, the bow at her side. And she allowed herself to pitch forward, no longer aware. No longer caring.

Note: * _Shine_, as in the Japanese command "Die!" not the English word. Sorry for the confusion but I like being able to incorporate Japanese at times. Makes it feel more like an anime than a fanfic. =)

Also, people, people! I would never end a story like that! I'm so sorry for all those who were like, "Is that the _end???_" This story is going to keep going, like it or not, mwa-hahahahahah!!

Oh, so sorry for that…

Also, I started a small oneshot Lemon for Sesshoumaru and Rin and I was just wondering if anyone would actually want to read it? If anyone wants to, let me know and I'll post it up on the site, ok? I'm just not sure how people would respond to it. 

And lastly, I came across a doujinshi yesterday online (Yes, damn it, a hentai doujinshi… ever wonder why really good art always happens to be hentai..?) featuring Sango, and in the end Miroku shows up. Now, this is the same artist who did Tasukurumono, and for all those who have come across that know that the art for that was amazing (although the fact that it was hentai…). Anyways, I think I'm totally loving the way the artist draws the group and most especially Miroku, so my question is this: Should I actually pop in any kind of attraction between Sango and Miroku (right now, I'm _dying_ over the way Miroku was drawn) or should I just focus entirely on Inuyasha and Kagome? I don't think it would detract from the actual plot of the story, much less change it, but it would be cute in my opinion. And for those love-starved people who want to see Miroku and Sango together, it might include an NC-17 chapter. But I don't want their attraction to take away from the attraction between Kagome and Inuyasha, much less the actual story. Also if you guys decide you want me to go ahead with the Sango/Miroku thing, I'll also try to find scans of the doujinshi so that you can see the way the artist draws. I draw, too, and I luv the way the artist does it, so I can appreciate it, y'know? I'll see about putting up a few scans on the site as well.

Please let me know, in all truthfulness? You guys can just email me or leave me a review with your opinion.

Sounds like I'm doing a poll, right? LMAO!

Hope you liked the chapter! And time to bring in a cameo!

-Cassie


	10. Nakunatta

_Nakunatta:_

            "And Inuyasha?" Kaede asked grumpily.

            Miroku shook his head, shifting a bit as Sango crouched behind him. The smell of alcohol was powerful and he grimaced as she swabbed the area around his wound, cleansing away the dried blood. "It's already evening and there's no sign of him. I dread even thinking about Kagome-sama."

            Sango nodded faintly behind him, her ministrations slowing.

            Shippo's tail twitched. "Was it a bad thing, then?" he asked quietly, Kirara small and looking about with big, wide eyes. "To have returned the Shikon no Tama to her?"

            Miroku sighed, face thoughtful. "Quite truthfully, I don't know what to think," he replied. "I want nothing more than to believe the Shikon no Tama is safe in Kagome-sama's hands." And his voice lowered. "But we all know that some thing isn't right with her…"

            Kaede straightened and looked at them all in confusion.

            Sango reached over to the small first aid kit and pulled out gauze pads. "Kagome-chan…has been different. For a while now."

            Kaede came closer, listening intently.

            The exterminator placed the gauze pads to Miroku's wound and then reached for strips of cloth and bandages, expertly setting to wind them around his lean frame. "Lately, she's distant. A bit…off. Ever since…"

            "The youkai that wounded her," Kaede said for her and her face was thoughtful.

            Sango nodded and murmured an apology as Miroku grimaced. "But she's keeping whatever it is to herself. Inuyasha knows something's wrong but it seems she won't tell him anything-"

            "And she seems a bit more…flirty," Miroku murmured and his face was the perfect picture of worry. "I'm not sure it's such a bad thing, actually-"

            Sango glowered and tightened the bandage with one hard yank.

            _"Itai!"_

            "Is that why Inuyasha took the Shikon no Tama from her, then?" Kaede asked and she slowly sat on the hard wood floor, head bowed. 

            "He did it for her sake…" Sango said quietly and Miroku glanced at her quickly. She returned his gaze. "You know it's true. Inuyasha would never force Kagome-chan to part with the jewel. Even if in the beginning it was like that, it isn't like that now."

            He gazed at her, silent for a moment. And then he nodded, eyes dropping away. "I know," he said softly. And he looked toward the doorway where the sun had just finished setting behind the trees. He stared for a long while, quietly, as Sango finished fixing him up and then he sat like that, still staring.

            Shippo sighed and plopped down on his back, eyes worried. "He'll find her," he murmured, to reassure the group as well as himself. "He always does."

            She was cold.

            All around her, the wind was freezing, her body shaking furiously from it. And she was wet, drenched through. She made a small muffled sound, hearing water all around her, lapping gently. And under her fingers was loose dirt and pebbles, rolling under her as her hand jerked in a sudden shiver. Icy water splashed over her waist, her legs, and as her lower body swayed she found there to be a dim pain in her chest, and a strange pull as if something on her dragged against the ground. Grimacing, she reached out blindly with stiff fingers.

            And she heard something approach.

            Her eyes came open, sudden clarity washing over her, and she saw long, lean legs wrapped in fur. Her eyes moved upward slowly and the person crouched before her, a male.

            "Kouga-kun…" she whispered.

            The man took hold of her and yanked her up onto the ground the rest of the way, his eyes fixed on the arrow that protruded from her chest. "Kagome…" he murmured in disbelief, his hand hovering over the arrow shaft. "N..nani-"

            Kagome smiled at him faintly, resting her head against his chest armor. "Yo…katta…"

            Kouga nodded thoughtlessly and he suddenly looked over his shoulder as another came up behind him.

            "Kagome nee-san…"

            "Go back," Kouga barked angrily, "and get some herbs ready." And with a furious rumbling growl, one that ran through her as she floated dimly, he hissed, "And where the _hell _is Inuyasha?"

            Sango stared as the sky lightened, her heart cold. The night had passed and neither Inuyasha nor Kagome-chan had returned. She gazed outward, her back sore from the hard floor, and she had kicked away the blanket in the night, having found no use for it.

            Beside her, Miroku exhaled, coming out of fitful sleep and he rolled onto his side grimacing. 

            She watched him, a worried frown crossing his face. "Hoshi-sama?"

            His eyes came open and caught on hers, blinking awake fully. "You didn't sleep," he murmured quietly and his eyes darted over quickly to where Shippo slept on Kirara's belly. His eyes returned to hers.

            She shook her head. "I watched the night pass and the sun is slowly coming up, and still nothing." She hesitated for a moment before whispering, "I'm worried."

            He nodded to her in understanding, falling into silence. She returned his stare and there was no awkwardness between them, not the way she always felt when she was caught gazing at him, or when their skin brushed together. She reached out and her fingers passed over his bandages lightly, eyes shifting to examine her work. "How do you feel?"

            He shrugged a bit, exhaling once more. "Sore. I think the Kazaana only made it harder to recover. But it will pass. It always does."

            And she nodded. "Yes, it does. Doesn't it?"

            He looked at her questioningly.

            She dropped her eyes away, saddened. So many things to go wrong and now this. She wanted to believe deep inside that everyone was safe but something was telling her different. If so much time had passed and Inuyasha had not returned it could only mean that Kagome was wounded, dead even. Or Inuyasha was. It shouldn't have taken so long for them to return.

            "She is different…" Miroku murmured and his voice turned quizzical. "Isn't she?"

            Sango didn't answer for a moment. There were times when Kagome got an eerily familiar look on her face, one of complete and total blankness. And it reminded her of Kohaku. Kohaku, under the madness of Naraku, alive only for the sole reason of hurting her and her group.

            _Kohaku…_

            She slowly lifted her eyes once more to the morning outside. "The day the youkai attacked…" she whispered slowly, reluctantly, "I was sure that was it. She was wounded and it felt as if those were the last few moments, for all of us. But Inuyasha appeared and I questioned myself. What had I been thinking? Of course Inuyasha would handle everything. It's what he always did, especially for Kagome-chan…"

            He stared at her wordlessly as she spoke, as she broke off. And then, very quietly and very slowly, he said, "Something passed between all of us."

            Sango frowned.

            Wincing, he sat up, clutching his chest with a trembling hand. She watched him worriedly but once he was upright he merely sat, his arms holding him up. "I don't know if you feel it, if you felt it, but that youkai did something. To all of us. But I think it hit Kagome-sama the most, the hardest. And I think now she's feeling the effect."

            Sango sat up as well, not understanding.

            His eyes shifted toward her, his face dark . "Since the youkai attack, I've felt…different. More…worried. There are moments when I don't believe in my ability, when I feel as if the Kazaana will somehow turn on me and swallow me instead. And I'm filled with such anger, it's a strain to keep in control."

            Sango stared at him, lips parted.

            "And then there are moments when I look at you…" he gazed at her, although a fearful look came into his eyes, "and I'm filled with…thoughts that will not…" he broke off, grimacing, searching for the words, "lead me in the right path."

            She blinked. "I…don't understand…"

            His lips pressed together and he hesitated momentarily, eyes shifting to the floor between them. To her hand. And he lifted his own and clasped her hand with his, merely staring at their grasp. She also looked down, her frown deepening, and then slowly she pulled her eyes back to his in confusion.

            "I can't bear to look at you," he said softly, eyes still focused on their hands. "Since the youkai attack, I haven't been able to look at you without thinking…"

            She swallowed almost audibly. "Thinking…what?" she asked in a shaky voice.

            He paused, thoughts racing. "Thinking that…to be with you would be like being taken in by my Kazaana."

            She stared. "What..?"

            He shook his head, seeming angry with himself. "You would consume me, entirely. And I wouldn't care, I would want it. And it is that thought that makes me understand that I am not myself. That I haven't been myself for a long time, now." He lifted his eyes then, looking at her finally. "I could look at you before and see you. Think you beautiful. Think you innocent. But now I can't bear to even look in your direction for fear that my thoughts would be twisted."

            Sango gazed at him for a moment, lips parted. "Twisted how?" she uttered faintly.

            He returned her gaze. For a long moment there was only silence between them, the faint breath of air that passed through the room. And then he turned his head away, eyes squeezing shut. "It doesn't matter. Suffice to say that only years of training are helping me at the moment. You as well, although your anger comes out in battle. Inuyasha, I suspect, isn't affected because of his half demon blood. Perhaps because of the Tetsusaiga as well. But Kagome-sama…" he shook his head. "She has nothing but herself and her anger will only further corrupt the Shikon no Tama-"

            Sango stared, listening to him murmur quietly. And as he continued on mumbling, "Hoshi-sama!"

            He broke off but did not look at her.

            "I don't understand," she whispered painfully. And she looked down as he pulled his hand out of her grasp, clenching it into a fist and propping it up behind himself. 

            "Neither did I…" he said quietly. "But I'm beginning to. And that means we're running out of time."

            There had been four sides to the youkai's face. Four. The Anger, with the narrowed eyes, and the set mouth. The Misery, with the ever flowing tears and the weeping mouth twisted. The Lust, with the seductively hooded eyes and the upturned edges to the lips. And The Evil, with his wide maniacal eyes and the mouth open in a laughing howl. Four faces. And four parts to the Shikon no Tama.  Four.

            _What am I not understanding..?_

            Up ahead the youkai jumped about like a marionette whose strings had been cut and had been left up to its own machinations. It danced and giggled, and sometimes it wept when its face suddenly shifted. And other times it beckoned sensuously, with long slender limbs. But always its face shifted to darkness and that was when it would attack, lunging about and clawing at everything in sight, breathing flame and acid. 

            Sango's boomerang flew through the air but the youkai latched onto it and bit into it, giggling eerily, laughing. The exterminator stiffened, a growl coming from her as the youkai spit the boomerang aside, still dancing.

            To the side Inuyasha was down, clutching his chest, which had been sprayed with acid. His hand had dropped Tetsusaiga and as they hesitated, they felt the pulse of the demon itching to be released from the hanyou's form. 

            "Get the sword to him!" Miroku shouted and he hopped forward, holding his staff out protectively. 

            Kagome looked toward Tetsusaiga and she dove for it, her hand swiping it up. It had returned to its original form, a torn blade, nicked and useless. With a cry she flung it toward Inuyasha.

            Before them the youkai shrieked with loud laughter, and his form exploded in black wind, similar to the Kazaana. A pure blast of heat flew and everything was suddenly blurred, wind roaring in their ears. Before her she could barely make out Miroku as he threw up his arm to block the wind, his eyes narrowed. Sango, to the side, went down on one knee, her head turned from the dust that blew into her face. And the youkai was no longer where he had been standing, his form gone.

            Miroku looked about quickly, straining to see through his flying bangs, and he suddenly whirled, his eyes wide. _"Kagome-sama!"_

            And from behind something tore into her shoulder, ripping clear up her back, shredding flesh from her body. Even if she had wanted to scream she couldn't have, it was so sudden. Breathtaking. She was flung to her knees roughly, thrust down, and all she saw was the world spin as she crashed to the ground.

            _"Kagome!"_

            That was his voice. It was always his voice, crying out to her. In fear, in anger. And it floated around her, in the darkness and the white streaks that she associated with her pain for it pulsed at the same moments her heart pounded. Black and white. Black and white.

            Something took hold of her head by the hair, yanking her head up, and she looked into the eyes of The Misery, watched as it shifted into The Lust, and then The Anger. Until it settled on The Evil and she stared in horror, as her blood widened in a pool below her. 

            Miroku swung his staff angrily and where his staff would have connected perfectly with the revolving faces it phased through as the youkai once more melted into powerful winds, gusting darkly. She was released and she settled once more, reaching in agony across the grass.

            Ahead of them it reappeared, all the winds racing back to the one spot and it had a moment to laugh malevolently before Inuyasha flew at it, swinging Tetsusaiga with a raging growl. The Tetsusaiga easily bit into the youkai's neck, separating head from body, and the head flew into the air, still shifting faces. It fell before her, rolling onto a cheekbone, that of The Evil, and she stared in wide-eyed terror, her fingers pulling back a bit. 

            Inuyasha appeared before her, taking hold of the hand she had out and he dragged her across the grass into his embrace, his body shaking against her, his hand hovering over her wound as he gazed at it.

            _Not again. Not again. It's what you were thinking then, wasn't it? What you were afraid of. That it had happened again…_

            And before her, as she looked passed Inuyasha, the decapitated head smiled and something flew from its eyes, blinding them all. Enveloping them all.

            _Not again…_

            She awoke suddenly, eyes snapping open, and she found her face pressed against fur. The skin of an animal. She turned her head fearfully, looking about, and from above came a hand, gently touching down upon her temple.

            "Kagome."

            She looked up passed the hand, her face pressed to the fur and she saw Kouga. She lay on a rug of animal skin, upon the hard ground of a cave. And Kouga beside her sat with his legs crossed, his hand pressed to her temple.

            "You've been asleep for a few hours," he murmured to her and his face was dark with anger. 

            She blinked, not understanding for a long moment and lying in silence. And then she shifted a bit, her face lifting into his hand, and pain swept through her, concentrated on her torso. With a cry she settled once more, her hands clenching into fists at her side.

            "Easy! Easy-" Kouga snapped although she knew he was not angry with her. Kouga never could seem to convey worry the proper way.

            "Where am I? What happened?" she gasped, her frame stiff at the pain that burned when she spoke, when she breathed. "Inuyasha?"

            Kouga growled under his breath. "I was hoping you could answer those questions for me, seeing as how I found you like this in the river. Where is Inuyasha?"

            Kagome stopped for another long moment, not understanding. And then it all came back to her. 

            _Kikyo. The Shikon no Tama that fell back into my side of the well. Inuyasha. With Kikyo. The arrow. The cliff…_

            "I left him…" Kagome whispered, eyes wide and unseeing.

            Kouga came to a sudden stop, staring at her. "What?" he asked in disbelief.

            Kagome moved a hand over to search her shirt pocket. And it was then she realized she was lying face down on animal skin, with no shirt. She paused, stiffening, and she lowered her head along the rug to actually take a look and make sure she wasn't just confused.

            Definitely half nude.

            "My shirt…" she said immediately, and she looked at Kouga as he pulled his hand away. "Where is my shirt?"

            Kouga gave her a patient look as if he had been expecting her question. "Hanging to dry. We washed it because it was soaked in blood. Now what the _hell_ is going on?"

            Kagome hesitated before answering, wishing she had something on so she could sit up. "Nothing is going on. I had a run in with an old…acquaintance. And she shot me with an arrow." She broke off into silence, her hands fisting and opening at her sides.

            Kouga stared at her for a moment, wordless. And then he asked, "And Inuyasha?"

            Kagome made a small, irritated sound. "What about him?" she retorted, and she instantly felt bad as he sat in silence once more. With a shake to her head she said quietly, "I'm sorry, Kouga-kun. It's just not…" and she exhaled sadly. "He was involved in the fight between myself and…her. And he loves _her_. He wants her. And I couldn't stand to be there, I didn't _want_ to be there anymore. I needed to escape."

            And she realized only then how frightening everything had been there, for a moment. With Inuyasha and Kikyo. How she had fled from them, from Inuyasha, because somehow she had known he would be furious. To the point of killing her for coming back. For getting in between him and Kikyo. For coming back for the Shikon no Tama. How frightened-

            And she suddenly remembered what she had been searching for in her pocket before the rude awakening at finding herself half naked. She looked at him quickly. "Kouga-kun, the jewel-" she said and she lifted herself a bit off the floor in panic, ignoring the pain that flared with her movement.

            He pulled it out, the Shikon no Tama dangling from the broken chain. And she stared at first it and then at Kouga, for it as he who held it. It was Kouga, who had Shikon no kakera in his body, in his legs. Her eyes shifted from the jewel, to the man, and back again, and she hesitated as his eyes ran over her form in one quick glance. She had half a mind to cover herself with one arm but he couldn't have gotten that well a look with the way she was positioned. "Give me the Shikon no Tama, Kouga-kun…"

            He hesitated, a smile slowly working its way over his face. "But…you do know the kind of power I would have with this jewel?" he questioned, although it sounded more like a statement.

            She stared at him, wide-eyed. "Yes," she whispered.

            He gazed at her, at her face, and for that she was grateful. And then, wordlessly, he held out the jewel to her, his face becoming blank. Fighting the trembling that had threatened to come over her, she took the jewel from him, feeling its weight in her hand as he allowed her to take it.

            "You're bleeding again," he said quietly, and he reached out with the same hand that head held the jewel, his fingers sliding across the skin of her back and hesitating close to the origin of her pain. With a grimace she bowed her head, her hair falling down the sides of her face, her eyes closing. 

            "I sat up quickly, I didn't think-" she began. And her eyes snapped open, widening, as he leaned into her. His hand slid away from the wound and instead she felt his breath, warm on the bare skin of her back. She hesitated for a moment, her entire figure stiff, her head still bowed, as his lips brushed her flesh. And then his lips parted and his tongue tasted her, lapping at the blood that stained her wound and her pale skin. She trembled then, no longer even thinking, and as if to acknowledge that he lifted his other hand to her back, sliding them across her skin to her shoulders. His fingers wound around the edges of her shoulders and he pulled himself closer to her, licking at the blood, brushing his lips against her flesh and her wound. 

            She couldn't think. She lay there, goose bumps rising on her form, wanting the world to suddenly stop spinning. And wanting herself not to desire the feel of his mouth, of his breath, on her naked skin. He made a small sound in the back of his throat, a small rumbling growl, and she closed her eyes slowly, wanting him to growl again. She loved that rumble that floated against the inside of her skin. She wanted to feel it always, passing from him to her. 

            One hand slid from her shoulders to her hair, pulling it from the side closest to him and flipping it about to the other side, giving him access to her. And his mouth moved upward, tracing her tender flesh to the nape of her neck, the pad of his tongue wet against her skin. Kagome turned her head, no longer thinking, and her lips parted in a soundless sigh as he nuzzled her neck, her cheek. 

            His other hand slid from her shoulders down, under her arm, and brushed the side of her breast. She grimaced at the contact, her hands clenching into fists once more, her weight resting on her elbows. 

            He hesitated for a moment, his other hand hovering still around her shoulders. And then, slowly, he lowered that hand as well, down her opposite side and under, and he cupped her with both hands, gently nipping at her shoulders, at her neck. She cried out softly, her head falling back, toward him, and he used the moment, turning his head to her and claiming her lips in a hungry kiss. She returned the kiss, whimpering, feeling him knead her flesh, and she realized she wanted to feel his hair in her hands, the soft silver silkiness. And to see his amber eyes gazing into hers when he claimed her fully as his, his body above hers.

            _Inuyasha…_

            A low, dark growl echoed about the cave, lifting the tiny hairs from her arms and the back of her neck. Kouga pulled back only a split second before Inuyasha's voice reached her ears, low in fury.

            "I hope I'm not interrupting anything."

            And she whirled to look over her shoulder to the mouth of the cave where the hanyou stood, outlined in the sun, his face cold. And Tetsusaiga in his hand.

Kouga-kuuuuun!!

Wow, I'm really just churning these out. I've been drawing a lot lately and writing a lot too, ever since I started stumbling across those hentai Inuyasha doujinshi. They're so cool.

Anyways, thank you to all my readers and my reviewers but most especially Quickening (QuickeningHeart). Thanks to you because you gave me constructive criticism concerning the whole Sango/Miroku angle. So while this story will allude to their relationship, it will only be another angle to the story and I won't stray far from the Inuyasha-Kagome relationship. Arigato gozaimasu! ***Bows humbly*** Also I tried to leave a review for Broken but it ended up freezing up on me and I'm just too damn tired now. It's 5:04am now and I'm still up because I decided to read your fic in one sitting. It'll be your fault if I fall asleep at work!! ;)  But all you guys should so read that fic, it's great! ***Purrs***

And finally, I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. I made a few changes to the site, not much, but maybe you can all see a few differences. =)

Please leave me a few words, either here or at the site!

-Cassie


	11. Asobarete

_Asobarete:_

            The look in Inuyasha's eyes was enough to rot away sunlight. Kagome stared, stricken, her lips parted in an o. And Kouga still held her. Feeling a sickening inside, as well as disgust with herself, she shoved his hand away, scampering away and sitting on her rear, her hands rising to cover herself from the both of them.

            Inuyasha watched her for a moment, a muscle tensing in his jaw. And then his amber gaze went to Kouga who stared back for a moment before slowly rising to his feet.

            "No one invited you," Kouga growled, coming close enough to breathe into Inuyasha's face.

            Inuyasha glared, hunching a bit, and he whispered softly, "I don't need an invitation. I came for what's mine." And with one hand he pulled his haori off his body, flinging it angrily at Kagome. She caught it, bracing against the strength he had put into throwing it. 

            "It isn't yours," she said to him, her face darkening with anger. "The Shikon no Tama is mine. It has been mine from the beginning."

            Both Inuyasha and Kouga looked at her with the same exact expression, as if she had confused them, but then Kouga turned back to the hanyou, hands clenching into fists. "Do you really think you can take me, Inuyasha?" he asked the half-demon, his voice low and threatening. 

            Inuyasha almost smiled, straightening. "I don't think you stand a chance," he replied and he wound around Kouga, coming toward Kagome. 

            "Kagome thinks differently," Kouga said to his back and Inuyasha stiffened, coming to a stop.

            Kagome stared at them both, from one to another, clutching the haori against her chest. And she flinched as Inuyasha came to stand before her, her form trembling.

            "Put it on," Inuyasha ordered her in a tone not to be argued with, "and let's go."

            Kagome swallowed. "I'm not going with you…" she whispered faintly.

            Inuyasha merely stared at her, his eyebrows pulled low over his eyes. And then, stooping, he took hold of her arm and yanked her to her feet, causing her to stumble. Behind him, Kouga made a sound and took a step but he whirled and lifted Tetsusaiga, the tip coming within centimeters of Kouga's throat.

            "Don't think I won't," Inuyasha whispered menacingly, his grip unwavering. "And don't think because I've put up with you before that I'll put up with you now. She doesn't belong here with you and neither does the Shikon no Tama." He glared, amber eyes burning hotly. "She's coming with me and that's final."

            Kouga stared back furiously from the other side of the sword, and suddenly, without making a sound he was suddenly moving, flinging the Tetsusaiga away from his throat and lunging.

            And Kagome dove in the way with a cry, bracing herself but standing in the way nonetheless. _"Yamete!"_ she shouted, cringing behind the haori and blocking his way to Inuyasha, who stood dumbstruck behind her. Kouga pulled up short, a fist raised, and the three of them stood completely still, in stunned confusion.

            After a moment Kagome cautiously lowered the haori to her chest, blinking fearfully. Kouga stood before her, fist lowering and the expression on his face was one of disbelief, his eyes narrowed. She stared at him wordlessly, clutching the haori to her chest and behind her she felt Inuyasha slip his hand around her arm once more, pulling her back against him.

            "Kagome-" Kouga uttered.

            She shook her head at him, the sign that he should stop before he said anything more and whispering an, "I'm sorry, Kouga-kun," she bowed her head and went around him, Inuyasha's hand slipping from her arm. 

            Inuyasha returned Tetsusaiga to the sheath, glaring ominously at Kouga, and Kouga sent back the dark look, turning his head to follow the hanyou as he too brushed passed him, following after Kagome out into the sun.

            They walked in silence, Inuyasha leading, and she found herself slowing as they walked through the forest. The sun was high in the sky now, beating down on them, and she lifted her eyes to the heavens. It blurred a bit as she gazed at it, sunspots blinding her. The haori was heavy on her frame, and it flowed with her steps, making her feel as if she was grounded but also as if she floated. 

            _The strangest feeling…_

            Ahead of her Inuyasha came to a stop, not bothering to look at her and she realized she had fallen behind enough to alert him. She bowed her head and quickened her step, catching up, and wordlessly, the hanyou continued walking once more.

            She did not like the way his shoulders were set, nor the firm line to his back. Or the way he walked with his hands clenched into fists at his side. She didn't like anything he was exuding at the moment. And she understood that he would be angry with her. 

            But she had every right to fear even walking with him.

            Her eyes narrowed as she realized it yet again. He had left her stranded in her world, stealing  her Shikon no Tama for his own purposes, and returning to the woman who would happily do away with him to have the jewel once more. And _he_ was angry? She slowed once more, staring at the ground under her feet as she stumbled on, her chest throbbing. 

            _And the bitch shot me with an arrow on top of it all…_

            She ignored the throbbing, shoving it away, wanting instead to focus on the point of it all. Which was that she had caught them together, red-handed, and the only way she had been able to had been because someone else entirely had opened the way for her. 

            She lifted her eyes to the hanyou, glaring, her anger simmering. Had the new moon passed yet? Perhaps it would be tonight. 

            _If the new moon is tonight and he becomes human, I can do it then…I can wait until they're all asleep. It would only take a moment. Use an arrow, stab him clear through the heart. He won't see it coming. He'll never see it coming…_

            Her vision blurred.

            _And he'll bleed such a dark red. He'll look up as he's dying and he'll see me with the arrow, my hand around the shaft. And he'll wish he had never crossed me. And I'll make him beg me not to kill his beloved Kikyo. But it won't stop me. I'll kill her._

_I'll kill her. And him with her. And I'll bury them separately so that even in death they'll never be together. So help me, I'll kill him with my bare hands…_  
            And she realized a tear was slipping down her face.  
            Ahead of her he had stopped once more and he let out a sigh, waiting for her to catch up. She did so, but moving at the same pace, and she lifted a trembling hand to her face to wipe away the tear track. 

            "You think I don't hear you?" he asked her, and he still didn't face her. "The tears don't mean anything. I'm through trying to understand what's wrong with you."

            She lifted her head as she reached him, her eyes widening.

            And he started to move again, long silver hair floating. Such beauty, such gracefulness in that form. Her eyes saddened as she gazed after him, at his image, and she wanted it to be over. All of it, just over. She wanted him still, wanted him to want _her_. Not Kikyo. Not Kikyo.

            "Why are you angry with me?" she asked him faintly.

            He almost came to a stop, almost looked at her over his shoulder. But as she reached him once more he didn't bother to wait for her. He moved on, tossing his retort to her as if he could no longer bring himself to care. "I'm sure if you search your memory of the last few hours you'll come across an incident."

            _An incident. The one where Kikyo nearly killed me with an arrow? Or the one where you walked in on me and Kouga-kun?_

            "You were afraid I would give him the Shikon no Tama…" she whispered and she bowed her head, her hair falling about the sides of her face. "You never wanted me to come back and when I did you saw it as a setback. And even worse was the fact that I ran from you, that I didn't want to be near you. And that I had the Shikon no Tama."

            He was stiff ahead of her and he had slowed as she spoke.

            "And you were frantic when you couldn't find me, weren't you? Your chance to become full demon, wasted away if you couldn't find me, if you couldn't have the Shikon no Tama. And you followed my scent, the whole way. To Kouga-kun, afraid that you were too late. That I had given him the jewel-"

            Silently, but with fury hovering about him and staining the air, he whirled on her, taking her by the arms, close to the shoulders. She almost managed a gasp before he thrust her forcefully against a tree and pain streaked through her as she collided with the bark.

            _"Enough!"_ he shouted at her, his pupils closing into slits inside his amber irises. He shook her, causing her to wince in fear and in pain, and he yelled still, his voice hoarse. "I was _never_ afraid that you would give the Shikon no Tama to him! I was _never_ afraid I would be too late! Because I was afraid for _you_! I was afraid what I would find because all I could smell was your blood, in the water, in the grass!" His face was dark enough, angry enough to send an icy shiver clear through her body, and she made a small sound, somewhere between terror and agony as he pulled her forward only to shove her against the tree once more furiously. "And now, now all I smell is _him!"_ His clawed hands took hold of the collar of the haori, yanking at it. "I smell him all _over_ you! Every _part_ of you!"

            She stared at him in stunned silence, cringing as he pulled at the haori still, as his claws raked her bare shoulders. 

            "It's disgusting, his scent mixed so close with yours-" he growled, and as she still stared his eyes fell to her mouth, open in fear. His eyes froze there, lips parted, claws digging into her skin. And he suddenly moved into her, pressing his lean frame to hers and kissing her, claiming her. She was forced back against the trunk, a cry breaking from her mouth muffled under his own, her hands clutching his white sleeves for mere balance and he almost seemed to crush her between the tree and his hard form. But he was not careful, nor tender, hungrily kissing her, his hands clutching at the haori and pulling it down from her shoulders, yanking it from her figure to catch at her elbows. Another cry made it passed her lips, fear suddenly rising inside her in a tidal wave and she flinched away from him, trying to turn her face from his. And his clawed hands took her arms and lifted them above her head, pinning them to the trunk.

            _No. Oh, God, no! Not like this, not like this-_

            "This is what you wanted, isn't it?" he demanded, pulling his mouth from hers and allowing her to turn her head from his. His breath was hot against her cheek, coming out in heaves as he rested his forehead to her temple, eyes closed. His jaw tightened, teeth bared between parted lips and he shook her, causing her to grimace. "It's what you wanted from me and when you didn't get it you went straight for Kouga because you knew he would give it. You knew-" and he released her arms to grip her wrists with one hand, lowering his other hand to undo the haori where it was still fastened in the front.

            _"Iie!"_ she shrieked, practically sobbing, her arms straining against his one grip, fighting to shove him away feebly. "Don't do this, don't do this-"

            "And you went for him," he breathed huskily, lips brushing her cheek, his silver hair falling forward heavily over his shoulder and fluttering over her bared chest. He had the haori open, her nude skin cold even in the heat of the afternoon. "You knew how he felt, how _I feel_, and you went straight to him, even when I had you trapped in your own time-"

            She shook her head uselessly, senselessly, whimpering, _"Inuyasha-"_

            "And now you reek of him. _All over_. All I could ever smell was you and sometimes even my scent on you and now his overwhelms _everything-"_ his clawed hand rose, passing over her stomach, caressing her icy skin and hesitating just below her breast. And he shoved his frame against her once more, pinning her to the tree, ignoring her hands where they were stiff under his grasp. She tried to pry free from him, going so far as to try to turn her entire body but his arm wrapped around her waist, claws digging into the smooth skin of her back and forcing her to become still. And she knew this scuffle wasn't even registering in him, wasn't breaking through to him. The fear in her heightened, causing her to begin to flail, arching to escape his steel grip. 

            "Hanase…onegai!_ Hanase-"_

            His mouth parted against her face, close to her own parted lips, and she felt his tongue, tasting her breathlessly. She made a small sound inside, fighting to hold it in because even as he was frightening her he was caressing her, his own scent hovering around her, suffocating her. 

            And then, his knee jammed in between her thighs and her entire body stilled in bone-chilling terror. Her eyes came open, wide, and she felt it, knew where this would go if she didn't stop him right then and there. He leaned toward her, his mouth closing over hers once more and she screamed against him, pulling furiously at her arms, struggling to keep her legs closed even as he lifted his thigh against her. 

            "How far did he get?" he asked her and there was a dangerous tone in that whisper, his lips hard against hers. "How far do I go before I stop smelling him?"

            _No…_

            He released her, lifting his hand to pull open his own white top. He yanked it open in a furious gesture and off one shoulder, and he pushed against her once more, his bare skin pressing to hers, so soft and yet hard. 

            _No-_

            Tears fell, her eyes shutting tightly, not wanting to see. Not wanting to feel. And he kissed her again, so hungrily, almost violently. Fearfully. She felt the tremor that ran through him and she could feel it, equal parts fear and anguish. Pain. And she felt the same, deep inside, the same despair. The same coldness but heat as well, burning her as if physical. He felt …the same way she always felt, had been feeling for a while now. But he wasn't going to stop, not until he had her, the way he had had her in her nightmare, just as painfully, just as hurtfully.

            _"No!"_ she shrieked, her cry breaking from her mouth at last, her face streaked with tears. "Please, no! Not like this! Not again!_ Not again-"_

He stiffened against her, pulling away from her to stare at her. And his face was hard in his confusion, his lips parted. And softly, he whispered, "Again?"

            She hung from his grip weakly, gazing at him through blurred vision.

            His face turned colder than she had ever seen it. "Again?" he demanded, practically barking. And he returned her gaze, paling, as if he seemed to understand. His words came out in a breath, faintly, then. "I'll _kill_ him."

            Kagome shook her head futilely before allowing to merely hang, her body suspended against the tree. "No…" she whispered, hiding her face, wishing to hide herself. He didn't understand, she realized. "Not him, Inuyasha. You. It's always _you._"

            He didn't reply for a moment and she lifted her head slowly as the silence was drawn out. But when she did lift her head, her vision clearing, she gazed at him and her heart broke at the fear, the _shame_, on his face. And the tear that trailed down his own face, disappearing under his jaw. She felt her insides twist in agony at that one display and softly, she uttered, "Inuyasha-"

            As if she had struck him he suddenly released her, recoiling from her. And she fell to her knees heavily, her hands barely catching her on the soft grass. Trembling she lifted her head, one hand dragging the haori back up over her shoulders to finally clothe herself and with the other hand she reached out to him slowly. "Inuyasha-"

            "Your dream?" he asked her softly, so softly. Like a child, lost. "Is that why..? Why you cry? Why you can't look at me sometimes?"

            She gazed at him as he stood there, his chest heaving, and suddenly he lifted his head, looking around as if he didn't even recognize the clearing they found themselves in. He whirled, a hand lifting to his eyes, his breath rapid and unfocused.

            As unfocused as hers suddenly.

            "What…did I do?" he whispered softly, eerily, his hand wiping away the tear track, rubbing at his face roughly. As if to tear away skin.

            Kagome blinked to clear her vision and she felt a sudden warmth on her chest. Slowly, she bowed her head in confusion, fighting the dizziness and under the haori she caught a glimpse of liquid as light played across its surface. Dumbly she placed a hand inside the haori, against her chest, and her fingers came away bleeding.

            _Damn it…_

            "Inuyasha-" she murmured faintly. And as he looked at her, eyes wide, she fell forward, slumping to the ground.

A bit of a quick chapter but I think this needed to come out, just because I like misunderstandings between characters. Makes the story all the more fun, wouldn't you agree??

Anyways, thank you all for your reviews. Just about anything makes me smile and I always smile when I read reviews so thanks for cheering me up, all of you! And to Quickening for plugging my story, LMAO. Just keep up with yours!

-Cassie   

P.S. - ***listening to Waltz by Pierrot*  **Damn that's a sexy voice…thank God for Jrock/Visual Kei…


	12. Yumemiru Hito

_Yumemiru Hito:_

            _Colors. So many colors. And such strangeness…_

_            Wakaranai…_

            It was too much. The lights blinded her and sometimes the air was so powerful that it pushed her hair from her face. Or she was bumped around too much, her arms sore. She felt so much and yet, hardly anything. It was all too much and it was all too much to understand.

            _Wakaranai-_

            Sometimes she could open her eyes enough to see and she was propped on someone's back, cradled carefully and carried, jumping high, the air blowing into her. And sometimes she was close to the ground, the scent of soil in her nose, and silver strands of silkiness brushing across her face, over her lips. But then the light was too bright and she could no longer keep her eyes open. She became dizzy and the world didn't seem right.

            _You dream..._

            There was a throbbing in her chest and a sense of frenetic worry hovering about her. But it did not come _from_ her. It hung around her, staining the air, working it into a frantic mess of tension and fear. So much fear.

            _"Not him, Inuyasha. You. It's always **you."**_

            And then the light left and it was darkness all around. And when she opened her eyes she saw nothing but the night sky and she whimpered to make herself known. To show that she still existed. And in the darkness, over her, hovered the face of someone dear, with his silver hair and amber eyes swimming in tears. But if she closed her eyes he left her sight and he wouldn't return for what seemed like such a long time. But it remained night. And those times that she did see him it was because he cradled her in his lap, gazing into her face with such a pained look. 

            _"Is that why..? Why you cry? Why you can't look at me sometimes?"_

            His name was on the tip of her tongue but she couldn't make it come out fully, couldn't speak it. The one with the silver hair. She gazed up at him, tears blurring her vision, her limbs weak and weary. 

            _It's cold…_

            And he would pull her closer to him, enveloping her in such strong arms. He whispered to her sometimes, his breath soft, his voice trembling but she knew he struggled to make it seem that everything was all right. Even though it wasn't. 

            _Everything will be ok…_

            Yes, he agreed, and his hand caressed her face. It would all be ok. And the look he gave her made it seem as if it was he who was trying to convince her as opposed to it being the other way around. But he was nice, to try to be so sincere. It would not be ok. She doubted anything would ever be ok again.

            He cradled her nonetheless, rocking her silently, or murmuring to her softly.

            _Sotto. Sotto…_

            And above him, behind him, he appeared again. Two images of the same person and she knew then that she was going insane. His soft words would not help her and nothing he did would save her. Not from him.

            "Did you really think I would let you go so easily, Priestess?" he asked her, the second image of the boy with the silver hair. And his face was dark with anger, with maniacal glee. He gazed at her over the shoulder of the boy holding her close and his teeth glinted in the moonlight, sharp fangs. "After everything, after holding on for so long…did you really believe I would surrender you?"

            Tears welled up once more.

            _Please, no. Let me go. Let me go…_

            "You are my treasure, white Priestess. Keeper of the Shikon no Tama. And before you there was Kikyo. The other white Priestess. And I came so close with her, so close…" his amber eyes glowed for a moment, flaring brightly. "But in the end she was stronger and I was banished. And I've wandered for so long, searching. And I found you and I saw within you the spirit of Kikyo and I knew it was my second chance." His amber eyes stared down at her and for a moment those eyes shifted sideways as he bent over the boy holding her. "He is beautiful, isn't he?" the vision questioned, staring at the boy. At his mirror image. He lifted a clawed hand and his fingers hovered over the boy's silver head, looking as if he wanted to run those claws through the boy's hair. "He's always in the way…"

            _Iie! Inuyasha!_

            And the boy holding her whispered that he was there, that he was with her, but so was the second image, and she would go insane with fear. She could barely hold on as it was. But the one holding her was pleading, begging her to stay with him, to not go. He would be so lonely without her, that he was always lonely when she was not with him. And over his shoulder his double was practically in tears of laughter, chuckling coldly.

            "Lonely… what a joke._ Lonely_. Like he's ever understood loneliness," the second said quietly, mirthlessly. "He's lonely now, without his precious Kikyo. Not you, white priestess." He came close, leaning passed the boy holding her, bringing his face close to hers, and she could feel his breath hot against her cheek. "He doesn't care for you. And you know, deep down, that it's true. You know it. You've felt it for so long."

            She gazed at him, the one with the cruel words, for such a long time that she knew his face would forever be scorched into her memory. Because it was true. She had known for so long now. And he had done all he could to keep her away, to send her away. Even now, who did he call for, even holding her in his embrace? Did he still call for the other one?

            No. She strained and she heard his voice, the voice of the one holding her and he was pleading with her, saying her own name, asking her to awaken, to fight. 

            "But is it really worth it?" the double asked in a purr. "Look at you. You can't even sense a Shikon no kakera when it really matters. He has no use for you, white priestess. He never did. He wanted you beside him because you are the reincarnated soul of his beloved. But who are you really, other than that? You're Kikyo's stand-in. It's all you'll ever be-"

            _No. No. He loves me. He loves me. Please, let him love me. Let him see me…_

            "And once you're out of the way he'll have the Shikon no Tama for himself," the second whispered almost seductively. "He'll have the jewel and the old priestess. And you'll have no place anywhere."

            The one holding her called out her name and in the darkness his voice was raw, hoarse with fear. And she realized for a small moment that her eyes had closed, that she had lost sight of him. Lost sight of it all. 

            "Just give up, white priestess. Give it all up and you can be free. Free of the pain. Free of the misunderstandings, the hurt."

            _Free…_

            "Free."

            _Free…_

            And she closed her eyes again, wanting the blackness, wanting the warmth of forgetfulness. And not wanting to hear the sorrowful cry that followed after her into the world of darkness and dreams.

            Sango sat up suddenly, here eyes wide. Beside her Miroku snapped up as well, grimacing a bit but pushing away the pain as from the sky came Inuyasha. They rose as the hanyou touched down to the ground and on his back he carried Kagome's limp form clothed in the fire-rat haori.

            "What happened?" Sango asked fearfully. And she stopped cold at the look on Inuyasha's face. "What is it?"

            The hanyou's face was draped in shadow, his shoulders heaving. "I can't hold on to her," he whispered painfully and he fell to his knees, still supporting Kagome's unconscious figure but seemingly not having enough strength to support himself. 

            Sango went around to his side as Miroku rose and swept into the small house that was Kaede's. Carefully, the exterminator removed Kagome, pulling her limp frame off the hanyou and laying her out on the ground. "How long has she been unconscious?" she asked.

            The hanyou shook his head, lifting a hand to his eyes and rising to turn away. "Just about 15 hours. I couldn't move fast enough with her. All I could think to do was bandage it and even still she's bleeding straight through it. And she's hallucinating." His body trembled but he faced away from the exterminator, his voice pained and fearful.

            "Hallucinating?" Sango asked, checking the makeshift bandage strapped around Kagome's torso. 

            The hanyou paced, still holding the hand over his eyes. "I think…I think she sees something that I don't. Or she's hearing something I don't. I don't _know!"_ he shouted furiously at the exterminator. "But she's talking…gibberish! And she won't let me-" he broke off, grimacing.

            Sango threw him a measured look.

            "She won't let me…comfort her…" he whispered, eyes downcast, and he turned away once more.

            Kaede came from the house quickly, looking as if she had been awoken and quite rudely at that. Miroku followed, heaving a bit and Shippo was on his shoulder, blinking sleep from his eyes. But the moment the kitsune's eyes caught on Kagome he snapped awake, his small face paling. "Kagome!"

            "How is she?" Kaede asked, crouching beside Kagome's still form.

            Miroku allowed Shippo to climb down from his shoulder and slowly he raised his gaze to Inuyasha as the rest of the group crowded around Kagome. The hanyou stared at them all for a small moment and then, wordlessly but with a wounded look, he turned away and floated off.

            "She won't stop bleeding-" Sango murmured faintly.

            "Is she going to be ok? Is she going to be ok?" Shippo continued to ask over and over.

            "Perhaps some of that alcohol she brings from her world-" Kaede mumbled.

            And Miroku frowned faintly, going off after Inuyasha. He vaguely heard Sango call to him but he waved to her that he would return. There was something he needed to do first, something that the hanyou needed to answer.

            "Inuyasha," he said as he caught up to the half-demon and he paused as the hanyou stopped finally, hovering close to the forest. He opened his mouth to speak but broke off as pain swept his form from the wound the scorpion had left. Grimacing, he clutched his wound and looked at the hanyou. "What happened?"

            Inuyasha returned the look, his face lost in shadow, his hair gleaming in the moonlight. "You know what happened," he growled dangerously. "You were there when it happened-"

            "While you were gone," Miroku cut him off curtly, coming closer. "Don't dismiss it so easily, Inuyasha. When you were gone looking for her, in the small amount of time that you two were alone together, what happened?"

            The hanyou hesitated. "Nothing," he whispered.

            The monk cocked his head warningly. "Inuyasha-"

            "Nothing happened!" the hanyou shouted furiously at him, cutting him off, anger rising from his form almost palpably. "Nothing-"

            And at the look on the monk's face he came to a stop, heaving emotionally. The silence that fell upon them was laced with suspicion and fear. And a deep sorrowful agony. But Miroku was not there to judge. Miroku never judged. And slowly, Inuyasha came forth, his head bowed shamefully.

            "I almost did it, Miroku," he whispered faintly, so faintly. He trembled and the monk knew it had nothing to do with the cold night. It had to do with something shameful, something that had scared the hanyou enough to make him hesitant.

            "What did you almost do, Inuyasha?" he asked the half-demon reluctantly, suddenly not wanting to know. Somehow he knew, it would just be bad.

            The hanyou didn't meet his eyes when he spoke, his eyebrows drawn together in a mask of pain. "I almost made her mine…" he uttered, and he lifted a hand to his face, his claws scraping across his skin as he rubbed his eyes once more. "Against her will…"

            Miroku stared at him. "Inuyasha…" he breathed.

            "I don't understand what happened-" Inuyasha cut him off quickly, almost pleading. "But I was furious with her. I was scared out of my mind for her, all I could smell was her blood on everything, all around, and when I found her-"

            The monk leaned closer to the hanyou, urging him to continue. 

            Inuyasha took a long moment, silent. And then, slowly, his jaw clenched, his frame stiffening and he said very quietly, "She was with Kouga."

            Miroku recoiled a bit as if he hadn't been expecting that. "Kouga?" And then his eyes widened in disbelief. "_With_ Kouga?" he questioned, stressing the sentence.

            The hanyou fell silent once more and there was the faint buzzing of anger but also confusion and still shame. "It didn't get that far. But I ran with it, Miroku," he said. "I came in at a bad time and I saw something that I shouldn't have seen and I was furious with her. I was furious that she would have me worry and then to walk in and…_see her with him_…" he shook his head, grimacing. 

            The monk looked at him carefully, lowering his voice to the hanyou. "But you know that whatever you did see between the two of them…it is not up to you to judge the things she does. You gave up anything you may have had with her a long time ago when you chose Kikyo over her-"

            Inuyasha looked at him quickly, lips parting.

            "And you did it for Kikyo, yes," Miroku said and he lifted a hand to clasp the hanyou's shoulder. "And you may have remained friends with Kagome-sama but you have no say in the matter. Not anymore."

            The hanyou's face slowly turned sorrowful as he stared at the monk, as he understood.

            The monk hesitated with his next sentence, his lips parted to speak. "Inuyasha…I think something was left behind when you killed that youkai…"

            And the hanyou's face turned quizzical.

            Miroku looked over his shoulder as if he didn't want anyone nearby and then, lowering his tone even more, into that of a confidential whisper, he said, "Ever since the youkai that wounded Kagome-sama…there has been something different. And I don't know if you have felt it but I know I have. I know Sango has felt it. And Kagome-sama for a _fact_ is under it-"

            "Under what?" Inuyasha asked and his face turned dark, his frame straightening as if he were ready to kill.

            Miroku paused, unsure how to answer. "I can only guess it's a spell. But I have no idea how that can be if we killed that demon-"

            Inuyasha blinked. "The one with the revolving face?" he questioned. And then, turning angry once more, "Miroku, make some sense!"

            The monk inhaled patiently, eyes focused on the ground thoughtfully. "My words aren't helping me. I can't seem to make sense to anyone anymore…" the monk shook his head. "Inuyasha, Kagome-sama has been…different, ever since that encounter. Haven't you noticed? Haven't you noticed anything at all different about her?"

            Inuyasha paused, looking at the monk suspiciously. He _had_ noticed actually but he had never attributed her personality changes with the youkai. On the contrary, he had just wondered if maybe she had been going through her _womanly cycle._ But it was true, ever since that battle in which Kagome has been wounded, she had been acting differently. The hanyou's eyes slowly fell away, his heart breaking. He had wanted to believe that maybe there had finally been another chance since he had discarded the first opportunity. And he had almost welcomed it because it would have meant a second chance with Kagome. But now…

            Miroku was still looking at him when he raised his head once more. "Time is running out," he said quietly. "And the Shikon no Tama only becomes more clouded. Her spirit is becoming tainted and she will not be able to sustain the Shikon no Tama at this rate."

            Inuyasha stared at him. "What are you saying?" he asked him with a cold frown.

            The monk straightened. "I'm saying we need to figure this out before she gets well. If she recovers it will be the same thing all over again-"

            "But what is there to figure out?" Inuyasha demanded. "You aren't even making sense! I have no idea what you're talking about! All I do know is that Kagome is over there dying because of something I _started! I started this, Miroku!_ Had I not thought that taking the Shikon no Tama would save her she wouldn't be in this situation! She would be getting mad at me right now for acting stupid, sitting me left and right-"

            "No," Miroku cut him off and he looked over his shoulder once more. "This started before that. This has been going on for a while now. My only question is how is it possible if we destroyed that youkai-"

            "Inuyasha!" came Shippo's voice suddenly and above, flying on Kirara's back came the Kitsune. He hovered above them, his face pale. 

            "What is it?" Inuyasha asked him, frowning.

            "Kagome-" was all Shippo said and Kirara touched down to allow Miroku to climb up. 

            The hanyou merely looked at him for a moment before whirling and racing back toward Sango and Kaede.

            _"Look at you, you poor little insignificant thing…"_

            She couldn't see in the darkness. She could only feel and breathe and upon the air came the familiar scent of wood and tree. Wildness. She shook her head, trying to focus her vision but only blackness surrounded her. Blackness and that evil voice, whispering in her ear, hovering around her heavily.

            _"Did you really think he would be here for you…? That **I** would be here for you…?_

In the blackness she felt warm breath upon her face and she turned her head in that direction, searching blindly. The voice of Inuyasha. He was close by, around her but not within reach-

            "Inuyasha-"

            A tongue lapped at her face and she shuddered, turning her face away. 

            _"Look at you! I show you affection and you don't even want that. What **do** you want, Kagome? What do you **really** want?_

            She wanted to find a way out of the blackness that surrounded her. Wanted that voice to stop being Inuyasha's because he was never so cold to her, never so angry. And she wanted that strange little shiver running up and down her spine to stop…

            _"You want me. All of me. Body and soul…"_ came his voice again, so soft against her ear, almost loving. She tilted her head a bit, yearningly, and she was rewarded with a gentle kiss to her lobe, the warmth of his breath. And if she allowed herself to feel she was almost sure that was his silky hair falling across her collar, against her chest. Heavy, thick hair. She whimpered softly, turning her face to him, reaching longingly. 

            _"Yes. Body and soul. You've wanted me for so long, since the beginning. You've wanted to feel my skin against yours, my breath mingling with yours,"_ Her arms at her sides were grasped tenderly by the wrists, claws scraping gently, smooth skin brushing hers. Fingers trailed up her arms, toward the elbows, passed. _"You've lusted after me…"_

            Kagome arched, her lips parting, needing to feel more of him. It was such a tease, a cruel tease, the way he behaved. He must know, after all this time, he must understand-

            _"And now you can't help but want me this way. Deep inside you would give it all up for one unforgettable experience with me. Just one. Especially since you've dreamed up so many others…_

            "Oh…no…" she whispered into the darkness, suddenly feeling as if he could see everything she had inside her. Every shameful thing, every shameful _thought_, she felt he could see it all. And she felt unbearably naked before his presence, hovering in the blackness. She had always hoped that if it were to ever happen between herself and Inuyasha that he would accept her for her, that he would see into her and still love her. And now that it was being put to the test she was overwhelmed by the humiliation she felt.

            _"That's an interesting one…how long is **that** little fantasy of yours…?"_

            He could see it all. And he was being callous about it. He was being dismissive with her thoughts, her images. Her dreams. All of it was a joke to him. Tears welled up as he murmured to her, his fingers trailing across her skin playfully, his voice teasing her cruelly. 

            _"Didn't you know I could see into your thoughts? Into your desires? I **am** your desires. In your world you can turn me, twist me into anything you want. Ask me to jump and I'll let you **fly**…"_

            She shuddered as his fingers roamed upward, brushing passed her collar, across her skin to her throat, scratching a claw into her flesh.

            _"But this isn't your mind anymore, Kagome. You've just wandered into my world and there are three ways you can go from here. Any three ways. Pick one. Any one. Or choose to stay here. With me."_

            Where else was there to go? She grimaced, exhaling as his fingers dipped down her torso, trailing down between her breasts slowly, his hand opening wide as it dragged. Her skin prickled and she whispered, "Don't. Don't so this. Just let me go, let me wake up-"

            _I can't take more of this. I'll let him do what he wants if I don't wake **up-**_****

            _"Is that so bad? Letting me do what I want? I guarantee you would enjoy it. But then again…you already knew you would. So what would be the harm? I'll only prove to you that the person is as real-"_

            She felt lips brush her skin just below her breast, a warm tongue lapping at her skin.

            _"…as the dream…"_

            Trembling, she arched once more, reaching blindly. She encountered arms, long lean arms, and she took hold of them, dragging him closer. "Inuyasha-"

            A soft laugh echoed in her ear as she felt a masculine body come close, brushing up against her and then lay upon her. Heavy and suffocating. Mindlessly she wound her arms around his neck, embracing him to her, and he allowed her, still laughing almost silently in her ear.

            _"Do I feel real?"_

            "Yes…" she whispered and she closed her eyes, blackness upon more blackness, as he pulled himself up from her a bit. In the darkness she felt hands lift to her face and she arched her head back, giving herself to him, to his gentle fingers as he trailed them across her cheeks, her jaw. His skin was warm against hers and she realized once more that in this darkness she was nude. As was he. She could feel all of him, resting on all of her. And it made her shiver in anticipation, wanting. 

            _"Is this what you want?"_

            "Yes…" she said again, pleading, and her sigh was lost as he rose above her, his mouth closing over hers suddenly. He made a small sound, his kiss deepening, and she clasped him to her, shifting under his weight. His hair fell down the sides of his face but even opening her eyes into slits she saw nothing. Nothing but blackness.

            _"Would you like to see my face?"_

            She broke the kiss, crying out, "Yes!" and she allowed him to pull away once more, her eyes coming open fully to see him in the darkness.

            And there, slowly coming into focus, coming into light, was the lean frame of the hanyou. But where his face should have been was the shifting faces of the youkai. The Lust with the narrowed eyes and the mysterious smile. Icy fear shot through her and she opened her mouth to scream but he clamped his hand down over her lips, laughing as she struggled under his grip.

            _"Isn't this what you wanted, Kagome? Didn't you want to see my face?"_

            She shrieked through his hand, kicking and lashing out in terror and more arms suddenly sprang from him, breaking from his form and clamping down on her to hold her still. She screamed again, tears rising in her eyes, and the face suddenly shifted into The Evil. 

            _"No fun for us, then?"_ he questioned and blood abruptly rose on her chest, a dark pool slowly widening. She looked at it in disbelief, not understanding, but she felt the pain that came with it, clear through her entire form. 

            _I was shot…with the arrow…_

            And suddenly, one of his hands rose into the air and stabbed downward, piercing her chest where the hole allowed more blood to flow free. And she screamed as pure agony swept through her, screaming into the blackness.

            Inuyasha broke from the trees, Kagome's screaming echoing in the night and she lay on the ground still, but she thrashed wildly, shrieking as if the devil were trying to kill her. Kaede sat at her head, Sango straddling her, struggling to hold the girl down and she looked at Inuyasha as he swept up beside her, her eyes fearful. "She suddenly started screaming! I don't understand-"

            Inuyasha took hold of one of Kagome's hands and moved Sango over, throwing one leg over and straddling her himself. Under him Kagome screamed once more, her face twisted fearfully, her eyes shut tightly. "Kagome!" he shouted at her, grasping her other arm by the wrist and shoving her to the ground. "Oy, Kagome! Wake _up_!"

            And for one moment her eyes came open, blurred with tears and she saw him clearly, _recognized him_, before stiffening and screaming even louder, thrashing furiously. 

            _"Iie! Iie!"_

            On her chest the bandage was soaking through with blood, the stain widening and Sango quickly ripped off a bit of her shirt, pressing down on Kagome's chest and looking at Inuyasha in terror.

            "What is going _on?_" she demanded.

            Behind them Kirara touched down and Miroku swung off, already holding a slip of paper in his hand. Murmuring quietly he swung it toward Kagome and the paper caught to her forehead, snapping straight. 

            Kagome's screams stopped in mid-wail and a breathless moment later she fell flat, silent.

            Inuyasha stared for a moment, settling limply on top of her and beneath him Kagome seemed to sleep, the blood widening under Sango's hand. Sango stared at him, breathing rapidly and together they both looked at Miroku wordlessly.

            The monk's face was firm and dark, standing stiff. "We're losing," he said simply.

            And all Inuyasha could so was look back toward Kagome as she slept on.

And you all thought you were confused before! LMAO!

Anyways, this one is for my girl Iseult because she threatened me if I didn't have a chapter out before she left for Canada so here you go! Hope you are completely and totally confused by this one! ;) 

Also for all those in the Inuyasha EcchiFanfic group there's a fic I wrote which is up on my site about an encounter between Sesshoumaru and an adult Rin if you guys want to check it out!

-Cassie


	13. Maboroshi

_Maboroshi_:

            She looked about, her hair swept around her face, and the world was blue and green, yellow sunlight streaming down through the trees. It was so beautiful to be here for this was her time, her world. This was the small meadow in the park, not far from her home, and across the wide expanse of green grass she saw no one about but the world was happy. She smiled faintly, inhaling deeply and wondering why she had felt such terror before. There was the remnants of a frantic feeling to the atmosphere around her, as if she had gotten passed a terrible moment and now she was relishing the aftermath. She didn't understand it and, quite frankly, she couldn't bring herself to care either. It was over and done with.

            "Kagome."

            She turned at the voice behind her, recognizing it and Inuyasha stood there, his face gentle but awkward, the way he always looked when he was faced with the difficult task of being honest with his feelings. She tilted her head as she looked at him, wondering why he was there when this was her world. He didn't come to her world often. "Inuyasha," she said in surprise.

            His face softened at her voice, at the way she said his name and he came forward, undoing the fire-rat haori. She watched him, feeling a small twinge of unease but then he was pulling off the haori and he wound it around her own frame, holding it closed at her collar. She frowned faintly, feeling the heavy material settle on her and he leaned into her, closing his eyes and resting his forehead against hers. "I'm with you, Kagome," he whispered sadly, his hair falling down the sides of his face and brushing her skin.

            She looked at him with wide eyes from barely an inch away. "Inuyasha-" she murmured, not understanding.

            "Whatever happens…" he continued, his eyes still shut, his frame a comfort. "Know that I am with you. Always."

            She blinked. And she smiled faintly at him, eyes closing into moon crescents. "I know, Inuyasha. I know-"

            And she suddenly felt the absence of air, like a vacuum, and a terrified voice in the darkness that suddenly pervaded her form, her world.

            _"Iie! Yamete! Yamete**, onegai-"**_

            Then the world was blue and yellow once more and Inuyasha's voice trembled as he held her, his eyes shut tightly. "Don't listen to it, Kagome. I'm here. I'm real. Feel me. _See_ me-"

            But she was suddenly frightened. For a moment she was filled with inexplicable fear even though the world was light and airy. She stared, unseeing, and was it all an illusion? Was there something else outside her world, something she wasn't seeing?

            Shakily, she pulled her head away from his, seeing his eyes come open to merely gaze at her and she tilted her head to see over his shoulder.

            There, at the edge of the meadow stood Miroku, holding his staff before him. And behind him her beautiful world of green grass and blue skies was suddenly cut off by a shimmering wall of black electricity and smoke. Her eyes widened as dust blew, upsetting Miroku's short hair, but he remained fixed, gazing at them and standing before her Inuyasha was silent. She couldn't bring her eyes away from that dark wall, couldn't understand but the hanyou didn't give her a chance to as he lifted his hands to her face, cupping her jaw. 

            "You are safe here," he said to her, his face pale. "You're always safe here, you and the Shikon no Tama-"

            The green-blue world was momentarily streaked red. 

            "I will keep you safe. On my life, I swear it to you-"

            She looked at him, fearfully, and all around she suddenly saw where her bright world ended, how it was confined inside the blackness like a bubble. She grimaced, feeling the tremors of horror and Inuyasha merely pulled her closer once more, shushing the small sounds she hadn't realized she had started making. 

            For outside, in that dusty blackness and looming over them like a giant, was a very angry youkai with spinning heads.

            Sango sat with her legs crossed, her bone boomerang clutched in her hand in an almost painful grip. Kagome lay flat upon small bedding, covered and bandaged, and at her head sat Miroku, eyes closed his hand lifted before him in prayer. The small paper ward rested upon Kagome's chest, just beside the bloodied bandage that was her wound. They had stopped the blood flow and Miroku had been sitting with her for hours now, lost in his world of prayer, Sango watching quietly. Fearfully.

            Inuyasha sat beside Kagome, merely gazing at her blankly, a tired frown on his face.

            They had been at this for hours, Miroku in silence, Inuyasha whispering to Kagome openly. Tenderly. Sango watched him, wanting to smile but realizing it was inappropriate. When he needed to, Inuyasha could be quite frank no matter how his face convulsed awkwardly, but when he was honest, he didn't care who heard.

            The exterminator's eyes flew back to Miroku and then to the evening sun setting outside the door. It had been a long day and she feared for the monk's well being. He had been sitting there in prayer for hours, with no food or drink, lost in his thoughts and silence, and she worried. He himself had not yet recovered from his own wound. She didn't know how long he would last, although she was sure he would last as long as he needed to for Kagome, but she didn't want him to weaken as well. 

            Rising slowly she circled about to Inuyasha's side and crouched next to him, setting down her bone boomerang. The hanyou barely seemed to notice her, his gaze lost, and she whispered faintly to him. Whispered that Miroku needed to rest as well. Rest and recover. They all needed to. And his eyes flickered for a moment, awareness slowly returning to him. She murmured once more, looking toward Miroku, and the hanyou nodded after a moment.

            She was right, of course. Inuyasha looked toward Miroku as well, shifting to ease the kinks from his stiff muscles and he lifted himself to his feet, winding toward the monk. Pale and weary, he crouched a bit and laid a hand on the monk's shoulder, shaking him.

            The monk didn't respond for a moment, his back straight, firm. But as the hanyou shook him once more his eyes slowly came open, focusing. And he slanted a glance at the half-demon and Sango.

            "She'll begin again," the monk said to him in a warning tone as if he knew what Inuyasha was about to say.

            The hanyou nodded that he understood and beside him Sango whispered, "You need to rest as well. You barely slept last night and you've been holding the ward all day. Sleep for a bit, hoshi-sama. Perhaps Kaede-"

            The old priestess came from the next room as her name was said and she also looked weary. "She is right, of course," the old woman said. 

            But they all knew that Kaede's prayers, while effective, were nowhere near as effective as Miroku's. The monk hesitated, hands still clasped before him but Inuyasha wordlessly motioned for him to stop for a while. The sunset was fading into night and they all needed sleep although he felt that sleep surely wouldn't come to him for the night. He looked toward Shippo who slept on Kirara in the corner of the room and, silently, he went over to the Kitsune and shook him awake.

            The small fox demon awoke, blinking sleep from his eyes and he looked at Inuyasha as if he didn't recognize him.

            "Shippo-chan," Sango said, coming up behind Inuyasha. "It's your turn."

            Awareness slowly returned to the child and he nodded, sitting up. Kirara awoke as well, yawning widely, and at Kagome's head Miroku rose with a grimace, faltering a bit. With a pained look Sango went to his side and helped him. He threw her a small but grateful smile and she could barely return the smile, her face was so fearful. 

            "Perhaps I am a bit…tired…" the monk murmured, and he looked down at Kagome, his face heavy with weariness. 

            "I'm not surprised…" Sango whispered back and she slowly helped him into the next room as Shippo and Kirara trudged up beside Kaede and plopped down. 

            The old priestess sat at Kagome's side, observing the girl as she began to shift, a frown working its way onto her face. She didn't think she'd last as long as the monk had but the girl seemed to have gotten a few hours of fitful sleep and the bleeding had slowed at last. Sighing inwardly the old woman slowly closed her eyes to prepare for her own meditation, settling comfortably.

            It was going to be a long night.

            Inuyasha had gone. And the bubble had gotten smaller. Kagome looked up at the black sky, seeing passed the blue of illusion into the reality.

            _"You won't let me in?"_

            Her eyes hardened as the youkai with the maniacal smile cocked his spinning heads at her. She sat in the middle of the meadow, her knees drawn to her chest and to the side was Kaede, standing like a guard. The old woman had been silent, barely speaking and not answering any of Kagome's questions and she didn't understand why but she did know that so long as either she or Miroku was there, she was safe.

            "It isn't up to me," Kagome replied and she lowered her head once more, looking around. Searching.

            The youkai straightened with a sigh, looming over her like an impatient god. The heads spun like a dial, seemingly thoughtful as what face to wear. And still there was no Inuyasha. Kagome craned her neck, looking around. There was no sign of life save for Kaede and herself and she grew fearful once more. She wanted Inuyasha.

            _"Of course he isn't here. He returned to the White Priestess. It's his place. It will always be his place-"_

            "No," Kagome said firmly and her eyes narrowed as she raised her glare once more. "It isn't like that. He's worried for me. He wants to _protect_ me."__

            The youkai scoffed at her hard tone. _"And you don't really believe that,"_ he confided in her, seemingly ignoring Kaede's very presence. _"Because if you did, he would be here."_

            Kagome frowned at him. 

            _"Oh, didn't you know?"_ his face seemed almost innocent. _"This is your mind, White Priestess. Anything you desire comes into being. You control this entire space. Which is why I'm so…impatient. I can't get in there. It's where you hide yourself from me and the only thing separating us is that old woman right there."_

            Kagome glanced at Kaede and the old priestess' eyes came open a bit, her hands clasped before her in prayer.

            _"So really, now. If you desire your hanyou so much, make him appear. Make him yours. It's all in your mind."_ And he hesitated a small instant. _"But you won't, will you? Because you know the truth. You know where he is at the moment. And he isn't by your side…_"

            "Kagome-" Kaede said in a low warning tone.

            And she looked at the old woman, eyes widening. "Is…that true?" she asked slowly, fearfully.

            _"In fact…where is the Shikon no Tama? Is it even on your person?"_

            "Kaede-" Kagome breathed, her chest slowly beginning to heave.

            _"I'll tell you where it is. It's in Kikyo's hands, even as we speak. While you sit here, thinking yourself protected by the half demon, he's off giving the jewel to the real priestess, the original Mistress of the Shikon no Tama-"_

            _"Kaede-"_ Kagome said again, her tone a warning.

            The old priestess grimaced and around them the bubble seemed to tremble a bit.

            _"Take control of what you want, priestess. If you want him so much, why not use the Jewel to make him yours? Isn't that what he wanted from the beginning? To use the Shikon no Tama to become full demon? You have the power to make that wish come true. And with it you can have him any way you want. You can change it all, you are strong enough-"_

            Kaede faltered a step and, all around, the world of color seemed to pulse, reaching to grow bigger. The darkness of the youkai's world was pushed away by her own world and she stared in sudden realization. She could do it. She could fight this enemy herself.

            On trembling legs she rose, looking up at the youkai as he stood over her, outside in his own world of dusty darkness. How would she do it? Expand her world? But would that push him out of her mind, out of her body? She wasn't even sure it would work that way. Maybe she should first try to bring Inuyasha to her. Yes, maybe that…

            And she looked to the side and called forth his image.

            At once, two things happened. Inuyasha appeared, smiling, and he appeared looking exactly the way she had wanted him to appear. The same expression she had envisioned, the robes flowing exactly so. And she wondered for a moment if the vision she had had of him earlier had been really him or a figment of her imagination. And behind her, unseen, Kaede fell to her knees, heaving.

            _It's true…_

            The youkai fell away a bit and she turned on it, suddenly angry. 

            _It's your fault this is all happening. You make me see things, believe things that aren't true! You've put me through so much pain, tortured me, and made me distrust Inuyasha. But he's waiting for me. Only me. He sees me-_

            And she widened her world of color, shoving the youkai back a step.

            At the same time, behind her, Kaede shouted something and she whirled to face the old priestess but as she was whirling she only caught the faint glimpse as the woman fell back and suddenly vanished. She stiffened, frowning, and above her the youkai reared up. All around, her bubble pulsed once more before abruptly closing in on her and she felt a sudden intense weight.

            _"Thank you kindly."_

            And from above her world came crashing down on her, enveloping her in darkness.

Ok! So I went to the site and did a whole new layout and put up this chapter and the next one because the next chapter is NC-17. Man, don't you guys just LUV those chapters? I know I love writing them!

I think I need a boyfriend… a cute Japanese boyfriend…

Anyways, for all my reviewers (especially Iseult, poor girl…wait, you mean I _didn't_ confuse you?? Dang it…) and all the new readers who decided to give this a try (peeks at Cataluna and Ookami-chan), arigato gozaimasu! ***Bows humbly*** Also to Hope and Harmony (for reviewing twice, LMAO!), KayJuli (wait, you want me to give away the ending to the fic? What fun is _that_??), Silvermoon Maru for making her get up off her comfy chair to go hyperventilate in the other room, and Quickening Heart, because she finally, finally finished Broken! Woo-hoo! Must…review…

Also for all my other reviewers, I thank you very much. Don't stop, I love reading reviews, especially if they're funny or sincere. =)

Have fun! ;)

-Cassie    *Bobs her head to Oblivion Dust's _Crazy_ and peeks at Quickening Heart*


	14. Wasuremono

_Before reading this please stop by the site and read Konton, up on the webpage. It's an NC-17 chapter so have fun! ;)_

_Wasuremono_:

            Miroku sat with his legs crossed, one elbow resting on his knee to prop up his chin and he looked vaguely ready to sweat-drop as Sango wrapped bandages around his good hand.

            "And _another_ thing! The next time you decide to go _running_ off without me, so help me, I will throw my boomerang after _you_! Do not do that again! You left me half-sick worrying about you, not knowing whether to stay with Kaede or go after you! And _then_, when I go after you I find you unconscious! Of _course_ I would find you unconscious! You went off without me! You didn't even take Kirara!"

            The feline twitched an ear.

            "And you've reopened the wound, just as I knew you would! Now you're burned _and_ stabbed and I have _no idea_ what-" She broke off in a squeak and whacked the hand that clutched her bottom.

            Beside them Kaede sat silently, her head bowed, her face drawn. They had found her unconscious still when they had returned bearing Miroku and Shippo had looked ready to break into tears.

            Especially at being told about Kagome.

            Kaede turned her head and looked at Inuyasha. The hanyou sat leaning against the doorway, gazing outward into the sunset blankly. He had been quiet for the entire day, merely sitting in the exact same spot, gazing out into the same distance. And he looked wounded himself, alone. With a small breath she said quietly, "Inuyasha."

            The hanyou turned his head to look down into his lap, an indication that he had heard her but did not wish to meet her eyes. 

            Kaede hesitated, realizing that the small room had grown silent the moment she had opened her mouth to speak. Sure enough, Sango was still diligently bandaging Miroku's hand, her head bowed, but all senses alert. And Miroku looked at the old priestess, all the teasing over and done. Even Shippo lifted his head, looking very uncomfortable.

            "I'm sorry," Kaede said quietly.

            Inuyasha made a face of impatience and looked back out to the sunset once more, his jaw clenching. "I don't blame you, old woman," he said gruffly, and he squinted at the sun, not feeling its warmth. No warmth of any kind. "I just…don't understand what happened."

            "It's obvious what happened," Miroku said for the old priestess and Inuyasha looked at him, his face dangerous. "That youkai has been with us for the entire time. It went after Kagome. She was the weakest. She was the most susceptible. And now that she has given herself to him he has the power of the Shikon no Tama at his command."

            Inuyasha threw another face, shaking his head and looking back out at the sun.

            "It may not be what you want to hear, Inuyasha, but it's the truth," the monk said softly.

            "But why?" Inuyasha demanded and he suddenly sprang to his feet, whirling on them as a group. Sango halted in mid-bandaging, looking at the hanyou and Shippo was stiff in fear at the hanyou's sudden anger. "Why did she join forces with it? Why was it strong enough to get to her? And why can't she control it now?"

            There was a long moment of silence, one that seemed to last an eternity. And just as the hanyou was ready to sit back down Kaede whispered, "She's angry. Afraid. Hurt. And the youkai knew this and used it against her."

            Inuyasha merely looked at her as she broke off and with a patient look he said quietly, "Just say it."

            Kaede bowed her head, inhaling. "She wanted you. She feared the feelings you had for my sister still and she was afraid. She thought there was no need for her if Kikyo was here-"

            "And she couldn't find the Shikon no kakera…" Sango whispered in sudden realization.

            Inuyasha looked at the exterminator quickly, his mind working.

            "She thought of herself as useless. And if she couldn't be of any use, why should she be here? What would keep her here besides the Shikon no Tama?" Kaede looked at the hanyou. "Inuyasha, of course…"

            "But she feared that if she could be of no use, you wouldn't want her. There would be no point to her, and especially not if you were still in love with Kikyo-sama. You could just as easily give the Shikon no Tama back to Kikyo and it could be the way it was before," Miroku added.

            "And it just all became too much for her, wasn't it?" Shippo asked faintly, sadly.

            Inuyasha looked around the entire room, breathing erratically. No one had said it but most likely because there had been no need to say it. Because it was an unspoken truth. 

            Kagome had turned because of him.

            He turned away, leaning weakly against the doorway. "And I chose Kikyo over her…" he whispered. "That one day when she came back, that she said she'd stay with me even if I chose Kikyo…did it start there?"

            Miroku shook his head. "No, it did not start there. But I'm sure that has stayed with her since. I'm sure it had some bearing on her decision in the end-"

            "No!" Kaede raised her head to the group, to Inuyasha who seemed ready to keel over. "Even in the end Kagome didn't hate him." She looked directly at Inuyasha, her one good eye narrowed. "She fought in the end for you! She believed in you! You were all she wanted-"

            "Then what happened?" Inuyasha shouted, whirling back around. He trembled faintly, holding out his clawed hands questioningly. "What the _hell _happened?"

            "He tricked her," Miroku said simply. As the hanyou looked at him once more he began to explain, "In everyone's mind, they are the strongest person. They can determine what goes on, what they see, what they hear. To have an intruder come in would pit them against that intruder and naturally the mind should win out. Such was not the case with this youkai. This youkai has been around for a very long time and he is very good at what he does…"

            Inuyasha glared at him, breathing heavily.

            "First, Kagome was in no way strong enough to defeat this youkai. None of us here really is but we all would have had an easier time with it. It is why we are not as affected by it as she was." He looked at Sango slowly. "We spoke of this…"

            Sango nodded wordlessly.

            "For another, as Kaede has explained to me, Kagome thought herself strong enough to take the youkai on by herself. To be a barrier between a person and an outside influence does not, in any way, protect you from that person."

            Inuyasha stared at him, growling faintly. "Explain yourself."

            Miroku nodded. "What Kaede and I did was to become a barrier between Kagome and that youkai. In doing so, we basically blocked off the youkai from taking over Kagome's mind. It isn't the easiest thing in the world, believe me. But, in blocking off Kagome from the youkai, we didn't think that we would also be attacked by Kagome."

            Inuyasha frowned.

            "In someone's mind, nothing alien is welcome. We were just as alien as the youkai. So on one side we had the youkai fighting to get in, which is pressure on the barrier. On the other side, instead of allowing us to act as her barrier, Kagome began to fight the youkai herself, which, in effect, became an attack on the barrier from her side as well. In other words, we were kicked out," Miroku explained.

            Sango nodded in understanding, Inuyasha leaning back against the doorframe.

            "She had no idea what she was doing and she wasn't strong enough to take on the youkai," Kaede said quietly.

            Inuyasha looked at the group in its entirety, eyes shifting from the monk to the exterminator and then to the old priestess. "So, that's it then. Kagome's gone," he stated flatly, amber eyes burning.

            Sango straightened a bit, sitting back on her shins. "We can try to find her, but…you saw how easily she took us on. She was already in control of that jewel-"

            "No," Miroku said and he frowned. "She wasn't in control of it. Did you see her face? Any of you, at all? She didn't know what she was doing. She was reacting. She isn't in control of the Shikon no Tama, not yet. The youkai is teaching her and, with her, he does whatever he wants. Maybe if we get to her before she learns to fully control the jewel-"

            "He needs her alive," Kaede said quietly.

            The entire group looked at her.

            Slowly, with a tired sigh, the old priestess rose to her feet. "The youkai can not survive without a body. Without a mind to control. Not now that he doesn't have one of his own. He's going to hold on to her for all he's worth. And he knows he'll be rewarded if he does. What can be more powerful than a black priestess with a jewel of power?"

            "She isn't a black priestess," Inuyasha barked at her.

            "She will be, " Kaede replied just as curtly. "Believe me, I know-"

            "Stupid hag, you don't know anything," Inuyasha growled. "You have no idea what she's going through, none of us do-"

            "I'm the only one who knows!" Kaede cut him off and she bristled. "I've seen this before, I've been in this place before! I know what she is going through!"

            Sango looked at her over her shoulder, Miroku straightening as complete and total silence filled the room. And then Sango frowned, slowly. "You've fought this creature before…" the exterminator whispered.

            Inuyasha looked at the old priestess with a murderous glare.

            Kaede hesitated, her old frame inhaling wearily. With a shake of her head she floated over to Kirara and looked down at the creature, her gaze distant. "No, not I. Kikyo fought with this youkai. Such a long time ago." 

            Kirara cocked his head quizzically, looking up at the old priestess.

            "She spent days dealing with him. He attacked her any which way he could. Through spells, physical attacks, mental attacks. All of it. And she had been so tired in the end. But she had the Shikon no Tama and that jewel saved her. She banished him, defeated him. And I haven't heard from him since. Not until these last few days…"

            "You knew…all about this…" Inuyasha whispered.

            "Not until I saw him," Kaede replied quickly. "Not until I saw him in Kagome's mind. I knew then who he was. I remember everything Kikyo had told me about him and I knew, looking at his faces, I knew who he was."

            "It doesn't matter," Sango cut in, seeing as how Inuyasha was looking more dangerous than usual. "What matters now is how to defeat it. How do we get Kagome-chan back?"

            Kaede shrugged faintly, shaking her head.

            Sango's shoulders fell limply at the response and she looked at Miroku then Inuyasha. "There has to be something we can do…" she said although it sounded like a question.

            Inuyasha shook his head, turning to look back out to the sunset. It was going to be a cold night, in more ways than one. The rain had passed through, showering the morning and now all the humidity was shifting, moving with the storm clouds. He leaned against the doorframe once more, the blinds lifted away to allow the sunset in. He frowned, looking out and about blindly.

            "Inuyasha?"

            He didn't respond to the exterminator for a long moment, focused on the world outside. "I can't smell her, I don't know which was she's gone. It would be pointless to go one way if she's off in the opposite direction…"

            Sango glanced toward Miroku cautiously. He nodded to her and she slowly said, "I need to stop by my village. I need to re-forge the boomerang and that's going to take me a few days. I can go along, take Kirara with me, and I'll find you wherever you go-"

            "No," Inuyasha said, bringing her to a stop. Arms crossing over his chest he exhaled, eyebrows drawn low over his eyes. "We'll go with you. While you repair the boomerang. Maybe I'll catch a scent of Kagome as I go. It's better than staying here the whole time." He glanced toward them, his eyes resting on Miroku. "What do you say, bozu? Are you up for it?" 

            Miroku managed to look thoughtful and unperturbed at the same time. "A long trip while I am wounded and burned-"

            "I already _warned_ you-" Sango began, looking faintly murderous. 

            "I'll go!" Shippo spoke up, raising a hand.

            Inuyasha looked at him, frowning. "No. You're staying here," he said firmly.

            _"Why?"_

            The hanyou leveled a glare at him. "Because I know the way you are around Kagome. You don't want to see her the way she is right now. When we straighten her out you can see her as much as you want. But for now you stay here with the old bag-"

            Kaede made a small sound.

            "And watch over the village," Inuyasha finished. And his tone left no room for argument. He maintained the glare for another moment before facing forward once more and looking back out into the sunset.

            "Tomorrow morning?" Sango asked.

            Inuyasha nodded. "Tomorrow morning."

            She cocked her head, watching the hanyou as he turned from the doorframe and looked back inside the small room once more. He hadn't smiled all day, his face retaining its usual scowl. She loved that scowl. She smiled faintly as she watched him, her legs dangling from the tree branch she sat on. It was going to be such a warm night. She herself felt very warm, the evening breeze blowing passed her, through her. 

            "So…anything I wish, I can do?" she asked.

            _Anything your heart desires. Do you want to fly? You can. Do you want to make yourself invisible? You can. Invincible? Might take a little more work than you're putting in…_

            Her smile widened. "You're angry with me?" she asked innocently.

            _Of course not. I do, however, wish you wouldn't sit around and waste time. You have much left to do and sitting here watching him won't accomplish anything. No matter how much you think it will…_

            She gazed at the hanyou, her gaze distant. "But it's so much fun to watch him…" she murmured distractedly, staring. "It's almost…a comfort…" and she hesitated, her eyes caught to the hanyou. 

            The half-demon nodded at a question asked him and he looked out once more, gazing at the sunset. It caused him to burn copper, his silver hair brilliant in the sun, his skin a golden bronze. His white top hung over his pants and she frowned. He didn't normally look like that. He usually had a red top as well…

            _They're making plans. To repair the boomerang weapon. It's for you. They're planning how to finish you. If you give them the chance they will-_

            Why was it that when she stared at him her heart softened? She frowned faintly, caught by his presence, her thoughts springing about in her mind. The voice in her head was momentarily lost in the shuffle of thoughts and she found that she couldn't look away from him. What did he look like when he smiled? Did he have a soft smile or was it the wild one that automatically seemed to be associated with him because of his scowl? She wanted to know. Did he smile at all? Had anyone ever made him smile?

            _Are you blocking him away again? I've told you many times the only way to become stronger is to face your fears. He is one of your fears. You must overcome to move on. I am here with you, I will help you along this path…_

            "Why am I afraid of him?" she questioned. "If I have all this power, why should I fear him?"

            _Interesting question. Have you asked yourself that?_

            She frowned, pausing. "I fear him because…he has something I want. Something I wish I had…"

            _But he doesn't, does he?_

            "He does," she whispered, eyes trained on the hanyou. "He has…love. He's in love with someone and I want him…to be in love…" she suddenly grimaced and lifted her hands to her head, wincing painfully. So many thoughts suddenly, too many contradictions. The babble in her head was incessant, no matter how much she tried to shut away all thoughts, all words. They continued to run through her, loud and soft, buzzing. 

            "I want him to be in love…with me…"

            _We've been through this before…_

            There were so many thoughts. She clenched her jaw, teeth gritting, and she drew in her shoulders to stop the sudden madness raging in her head. But it was too much, too many words, too many thoughts. Too many emotions.

            "Why can't he love me?"

            There came a definite sigh from the voice inside, the prominent one, and then he spoke again, sounding like a tape recorder.

            _He can't love you because he loves someone else. He's the one who has strung you along all this time. He's the one who pushes you away, who would steal your power from you to give to another. She doesn't deserve it. You do. You've been through so much for so long, why can't you be happy for once?_

            "No. It isn't like that…it isn't…"

            _It is. I'm sorry it has to be me to tell you this but it is. It's been that way for so long…_

            "No…"  
            _Yes._

            "No!" she cried and she suddenly fell, her form slipping from the tree branch. The fall wasn't long nor did she feel the impact for she never hit.

            Inuyasha abruptly stopped, halfway through lowering the bamboo blinds at the doorway. Lifting his head he sniffed once, then again. And his face darkened, his frame stiffening.

            "Inuyasha?" asked Miroku.

            "It's her scent," he whispered and he tossed aside the blinds to run out into the sunset. All around he could suddenly smell her, her scent assaulting his senses, and he looked about quickly, scanning the immediate area. She was close, very close. Close enough to taste on his tongue. His eyes narrowed as he searched the land, sniffing and taking a step first here then a hesitant step in the opposite direction.

            At the doorway Sango and Miroku appeared, the monk frowning.

            "I smell her…" Inuyasha murmured, his ears twitching. "I smell her…"

            And as he said it he suddenly lost her scent. He came to a stop, frowning, and he could still smell her scent clinging to the grass, carried on the breeze, but it wasn't as strong as it had been a moment before. He settled once more, disappointed and looking around a bit lost.

            "You smelled her?" Sango asked in confusion.

            Inuyasha nodded. "For just a small moment, I smelled her. And now I can't smell her anymore…"

            Sango glanced at Miroku. "What does that mean?" she asked slowly.

            Miroku pursed his lips, straightening and backing away from the doorway. "It means she's learning to control the jewel," he answered and with that he went back inside, retreating to the shadows of the room.

            Sango stared at him and then back at the hanyou as he wandered about still, sniffing the air. And then, with a shake of her head, she also joined the monk.

Ok, really quick chapter to explain before I go off to bed. I have a headache the size of… ***pauses then slaps own hand*** Bad Cassie, bad…

Anyways, hope not too many of you are concerned. The next chapter is where some of you might start hating me but then again, maybe she deserved it…

Thanks for the reviews, all of you! I'm very appreciative!

-Cassie

PS – Also, since Iseult mentioned it, I'm going to give the meanings of the titles I've used for the passed chapters so you guys don't hate me…much. Gomen ne…

1) See me

2) Uso to Akui – Lies and Ill Will (Malice)

3) Omoide – Memory

4) Yume no Keikoku – Dream Warning

5) Tsuiseki – Pursuit

6) Sabishisa o Shinjiru – Believe in Loneliness

7) Seijaku – Stillness

8) Mae Ni – Before

9) Ima Wa Dame – Not Now

10) Sayonara – Goodbye

11) Sento – Battle

12) Nakunatta – Missing

13) Asobarete – Tease Me

14) Yumemiru Hito – Dreamer

15) Maboroshi – Illusion

16) Konton – Chaos

17) Wasuremono – Something Forgotten

Hope that's good by you guys!


	15. Fuko

_Fuko_:

            Sango looked up once more, halfway through driving the mallet against the youkai bone. She twitched as Inuyasha continued to pace, his long silver hair floating about his lean frame. She turned back to the boomerang and lifted the mallet once more, shaking her head. Sitting on the other side of the boomerang, legs crossed before him in the lotus position sat Miroku, eyes closed in meditation. She looked at him as well, feeling suddenly cramped. "Inuyasha," she said, forcing herself to speak patiently, "why don't you go outside and get some air. It's very hot in here. The fire-"

            "I'm fine," the hanyou growled, not stopping his pacing one bit.

            Sango sighed, shaking her head once more.

            They had been at her village for a week as she had collected the youkai bone, had selected the perfect ones to recreate the boomerang. She had also paid homage to her dead and now she was close to finishing the weapon. She had been bent over the bones for hours, melting, shaping, and pounding. She was weary and sore and she was starving. 

            Before her Miroku slowly came alive, lifting his head and looking about. Night had fallen as he had meditated and he frowned faintly. "Kagome?" he asked quietly.

            Inuyasha stiffened at the mention of her name but continued to pace.

            "Here and there," Sango replied softly and she pounded the youkai bone once more, a bit too hard. The bone broke into pieces and she bit back a curse, slamming the mallet down impatiently. "Damn it…" With an exhalation she leaned over and bowed her head, shoulders falling wearily. 

            Miroku sent her a sympathetic look.

            "He catches her scent every once in a while," she said under her breath, staring at the youkai bone absentmindedly. "It'll be there and then gone the next minute. Nothing else has happened other than that while you were praying." And with an angry gesture, she shoved away the mallet.

            Inuyasha paused and glanced at them both over his shoulder.

            The exterminator lifted her hands to her eyes and rubbed them wearily. "This is going to take another few days now," she whispered and she glanced down as Kirara nudged her thigh. A small smile lifting the corners of her lips, she reached down and ran her fingers through the creature's thick fur.

            "Perhaps you should rest the night then," Miroku said. And he motioned over to the bedding. "I would be happy to share-"

            Sango sent him a withering look.

            He blinked owlishly.

            Inuyasha paced back in their direction, eyes trained on the ground in thought. A frown was on his face and his ears twitched faintly as he paused before them. Sango looked over at him, Miroku lifting his head and he said, "I've lost it again…"

            Miroku's face was patient. "Her scent?"

            The hanyou nodded. And he looked at the broken boomerang. "Not done yet?"

            Sango sighed and motioned to the pieces. "Have to start all over. This is going to take another few days." She lifted her head back up to look at him. "Maybe you should go on without me and I'll catch up? Take Kirara with you-"

            Inuyasha stared at the broken weapon silently. He seemed thoughtful in his silence, his arms crossed over his chest. Miroku raised his eyebrows questioningly and the hanyou looked at him as well. Then, with a shake of his head, he said, "No, it's pointless. I smell her and then I don't. I have no idea where she's going or where she's been. I can't risk going off in one direction and then have to backtrack if I lose her scent completely." He lifted his head and looked around the small room. "We'll wait for you to finish. Then we'll head off again, try to follow her…"

            Sango stared at him as he broke off and with a small glance at the monk she nodded. And she went for the mallet once more.

            "Tomorrow," Miroku said, stopping her hand. "Start again tomorrow. Nothing is going to happen tonight."

            She hesitated and then nodded silently and they both watched as Inuyasha wandered off, sniffing faintly.

            Her eyes came open suddenly and she blinked, clearing away the cobwebs in her head. The night sky was above and she gazed up at the moon, her hand raised to her breast. She hesitated, not understanding, and slowly, she lowered her gaze to her breast. There had been a wound there once. Now there was a small twinge, almost like the shadow, the memory, of a bruise. She moved her hand away and achingly rose to sit up. The night was colder than most, the wind howling through the trees. She winced faintly as she looked about, stretching her knees out a bit.

            _You're failing…_

            She stopped, frowning. "What?"

            But the voice that responded was feminine and soft, firm and yet gentle. 

            _You're failing. You've gone down the wrong path. You weren't strong enough to control the Shikon no Tama, to protect it. To protect me. They are overpowering…_

            Grimacing she looked about, searching for the owner of the feminine voice but she sat alone in the meadow, the breeze blowing passed her ear.

            _You…don't…understand. You don't…understand-_

            She lifted her hands to her ears, not knowing whether to block out the voice or to sit and listen to it whisper. It was such a soft, feminine voice, so beautiful. And full of such pain. She hesitated momentarily, undecided, and slowly, she looked down at her chest where the Shikon no Tama hung. It was still missing several shards but it swirled with an ominous black light, very much alive.

            Had it always been that color? She remembered when it had glowed with an otherworldly light. Otherworldly…

            "Oka-san…" she suddenly whispered.

            She had a mother, didn't she? And a young brother. A grandfather. And something about a shrine, a well. 

            _You don't understand…_

            What was her brother's name? How old was she? How much time had passed?

            _You don't understand…_

            Why was so much of herself blocked off? Why couldn't she remember details like her mother's face but remember hate? Such hate inside, almost coming off her in palpable waves. Why couldn't she sway herself from that dominating hate inside?

            A masculine voice cut into her thoughts, suddenly loud and unwanted. Eerily evil. And the voice sounded angry. Furious. It made her cringe outwardly even though she didn't feel the physical presence of anyone close by.

            _Who are you speaking to?_

            She looked about, feeling as if she was being watched, feeling as if she was cornered. Caught red-handed doing something she wasn't supposed to have been doing. "No one…" she whispered, drawing in her knees and embracing them to her chest. "I wasn't speaking to anyone-"

            _You're lying._

            "No!" she said quickly and she grimaced once more, lifting a hand to her head. Such confusion inside, she didn't understand.

            The voice quiet down for a long moment, hovering in the back of her mind, the presence underlying her thoughts. She was anxious at having it so close, fearful of the fact that she felt restrained when it was around. The few times that it floated away were the only moments she had to herself, the moments she questioned where she was, where she was going and, worst yet, _who she was_. She felt so muddled. And almost always, so _angry._

            _I apologize._

            She hesitated as the masculine voice came again, sounding repentant, in her ear. It felt like a small tickle in her thoughts, the warm breath of a lover and the mere thought of it in that context sent a shiver down her spine.

            _You know I would never want to hurt your feelings, distrust you. You and I are the only ones who understand each other. I understand your hate, I can make it better for you. I know what it is you want, who you wish to destroy, and I can help you do that. There is no reason to keep anything from me, to hide anything. Did I not say from the beginning that I was here to help you?_

            "Yes…"

            _And don't they all deserve to pay? Pay for making you so sad? Don't they deserve it? Doesn't **he** deserve it?_

            There was a flash of silver hair and brilliant amber eyes and the mere vision of it made her want to cry. And yet to see the face made her furious as well, all those tender thoughts suddenly raging inside her, boiling. She closed her eyes to it, to force the vision away. She didn't know she had such anger inside, hadn't ever had a clue to it, and yet to see the face made her want to suddenly tear flesh from bone, slash and break. She wanted to destroy him, _decimate_ him, and then she wanted to weep and plead with him.

            "See me…" she whispered, and she frowned faintly, grimacing, because she didn't understand.

            _Do you see the face? Of the one who started this all?_

            She didn't want to see it but the face came unbidden the moment she was asked of it. Trembling, she whimpered, afraid of the face. But it appeared there, foremost in her mind, and she was beautiful. Of course she was beautiful. Why else would he have gone to her? Why else would he have been drawn to her?

            "Inuyasha…" she murmured mournfully.

            _Don't think of him. It will only hurt you to do so. Instead think of this woman. Think that it is all her fault that you are not with your hanyou, that you can never be with him again._

            She exhaled shakily, feeling raging tears, pure burning emotion, _hate_, for the woman. "Kikyo…"

            _How would her blood feel on your hands, slippery across your skin? How would it make you feel to know that she is out of the way? From there you can do anything you want with the hanyou, he will be all yours. No more having to share a soul. It's your soul, after all! _

            "My…soul…"

            _And once she's out of the way you can be sure he'll come back for you. He's blinded by her, that's all it is. If you take her from this world he'll come back begging forgiveness, I guarantee it. He'll love you more than he's ever loved her and you'll have the perfect life. With him by your side and my power at your command no one would ever dream of getting in your way. We will rule over all…_

            She shook her head, lifting a hand to her face to rub it over her eyes. "I don't _want_ to rule over all. I want to go home…"

            _Where is home?_

            She frowned, pausing and she thought for a moment. Home? Where _was_ home, now that he asked so innocently? How long had she been here for, lying in the grass? "What happened to me? I was in the tree…"

            _You started questioning me. Again. You let him smell you. I saved you. He would have killed you had you shown yourself to him at such a vulnerable moment. You need to listen to my words, heed them. You aren't as strong as you wish to be, as I wish you to be. It's time you started doing what I tell you to do and finish collecting the shards!_

            She shook her head once more, and the night turned blacker somehow, the moon's rays fading faintly. "No. I can't concentrate on the shards. I can barely find them. All I can think about is her, I have no _time_ for the shards-"

            _You will listen to what I say or I will destroy you here! We've been through this before, you know you can't stop me if I decide to take you over completely and use you as my own! Now do as I say!_

            She stiffened, her face darkening. "No," she whispered, and she slowly rose to her feet, her hands falling to her side. "Don't threaten me, I do what I want when I want to. And the first thing we're going to do is find the priestess."

            The voice was silent for a moment, hovering in the darkness of her thoughts. She stood where she was, waiting for an argument, another threat. But then his voice came again and it was different somehow. Not as smooth. Rough and angry, the kind of voice that was always hovering between anger and impatience. And it brought with it an image of amber eyes and silver hair.

            _Keh. Do what you want then. The sooner you get rid of the bitch the sooner you'll have me to yourself…_

            A shiver streaked down her spine at the voice momentarily, the fine hairs on the back of her neck sticking up. And then, glaring, she whispered, "I need a bow…" and she turned and stalked off, her figure vanishing into the cool night.

            Inuyasha growled furiously, a low bark coming from him as he lost it yet again. He rose from where he had been crouched against the ground sniffing and he whirled, startling Miroku.

            "Lost it," Miroku stated knowingly.

            "Damn her!" Inuyasha snarled, and he exhaled, arms crossing over his chest. "We'll never find her like this…"

            The monk slowly trudged over to a tree and leaned against it, sighing wearily. "It's better if we don't at the moment anyway. I don't think I would be of much use and neither would you, quite frankly."

            Inuyasha turned on him, glaring.

            The monk's face was serene. "You wouldn't hurt her even if you had to, we both know it. And what will happen if that's what it comes to? Killing her to retrieve the Shikon no Tama?" The monk shook his head, bowing it. "No one wants to ask the question but everyone needs to know. Would you be able to kill her if that's what it took?"

            The hanyou's glare faded a bit into a silent frown. For a moment he stared at the monk and then, wordlessly, he turned his face away, eyes falling to the ground.

            Miroku exhaled, nodding that he understood. And in a quiet but resolute voice he said, "I don't think I'm strong enough, but if I have to I will. I will kill her to get the Jewel out of her hands."

            Inuyasha did not turn his face back at his words, did not show any kind of emotion. He stood silently, almost rooted to the ground, and slowly he inhaled, his shoulders falling almost wearily.

            _Would I be able to? Kill her?_

            From above came the sudden rush of wind and they both looked up as Sango came at last, astride Kirara's back. She was dressed in her gear, her hair tied back, and on her back she carried her bone boomerang, newly restored after days of work. Kirara landed roughly on the grass and the exterminator looked from Inuyasha to Miroku purposefully.

            "Any direction?" she asked.

            Wordlessly, Inuyasha sniffed the air once more before abruptly heading off at a slow pace. Sango frowned at his back for a moment in confusion. Miroku came off the tree and followed just as silently but with a meaningful look and with a small nod Sango also followed.

            _Misery…_

            The woman paused in mid-step, her long red skirt blowing about her legs and slowly, she turned, her soul-stealers hovering around her. She looked up as if she knew what to expect and her face did not register surprise although confusion did mar it a bit. Her eyes focused, her brow furrowing.

            Quietly, she said, "You are…Kagome."

            Kagome came forward, materializing from the shadows of the night, and she almost seemed to float, black smoke trailing from the Shikon no Tama hidden beneath the red haori. Her gaze was hard as she focused on the priestess and the miko did recoil a step then, frowning quite noticeably.

            "I don't need an introduction, then?" Kagome asked through gritted teeth and she swung the bow off her shoulder, pulling forth an arrow.

            But Kikyo's face was paling, a hand lifting as if to ward off Kagome's presence. "The Shikon no Tama…" she whispered, eyes widening, "is black…"

            Kagome put the arrow to the bowstring, already aiming. "As black as your soul, the small piece you took from me twisted in your possession," she whispered angrily, and in her hands the arrow blackened, glowing with a dark light, dusty smoke rising from it.

            "No-" Kikyo cried and she took a step, "it must not be used-"

            "I won't hear it from you," Kagome cut her off. "Not anymore. I will use it the way I was meant to use it. It is mine now, under my command-"

            _"Iie! Matte o-"_ Kikyo shouted frantically.

            Without a second thought, Kagome let the arrow fly, her entire form singing. This was her day. At last, at long last, her day of reckoning. 

            _He'll be mine again. With you gone, he'll be mine again-_

            Blackness streaked across the land, shooting toward the priestess and for a slight moment there was a flash of pure white light before the consuming blackness, Kikyo's figure swallowed by it. It was a simple moment of brilliance that blinded Kagome and she lifted a hand to it, to block the painful glare. But the moment was enveloped in darkness once more and when the smoke cleared and the dust settled, it was night once more.

            And Kikyo fell to her knees, suddenly gasping hoarsely and clutching the arrow that had pierced her chest. Blood fell from the wound, staining her white haori, and around her, the soul stealers floated limply to the ground and slowly vanished, dying away in a sweeping wind.

            Kagome lowered her bow with a sigh and she came forward lazily to stand before the fallen priestess. "It isn't the best feeling in the world, I know," she murmured as she gazed down at her and she lifted a hand to her own breast. "But I just needed you to know how it felt."

            Heaving, Kikyo slowly raised her glare. "You foolish girl…" she whispered in between heavy breaths. "I knew…this was what you would turn into. This was _why…_ I came for the Shikon no Tama-"

            "And you failed," Kagome said, feigning concern. "But I'm not angry with you. Not anymore. I think I accomplished what I meant to. Except…" and she hesitated thoughtfully, "I'd rather see you dead and gone. For good. No coming back for you."

            Kikyo didn't reply, her face hard and strained.

            "Is there a certain way you would like to die? _Again?_" Kagome asked politely. "I would think the whole claw-up-your-back routine is out of the question?"

            Wearily and with a torn look, Kikyo slumped limply on her knees, her hand dropping away from the arrow.

            "I'll take that as a yes," Kagome murmured and she bent toward the priestess.

            Moving faster than she would have expected of a dying woman Kikyo suddenly raised her own bow, an arrow at the ready and as Kagome found herself coming close she felt the tip of the arrowhead against the underside of her chin. She stiffened, coming to an abrupt halt and her vision darkened for a moment, clouding over.

            Kikyo glared, a drop of blood falling from the corner of her mouth. "The Shikon no Tama will not be twisted by your darkness-" and she let go of the arrow.

            A flash of light and darkness collided, Kagome springing backward blindly and with the light was a small spark of black electricity. Her darkened vision wavered before coming into crystal clear clarity and before her, broken in half, hung the arrow, frozen in the air.

            Kikyo's lips parted, eyes widening. _"Masaka-"_

            Kagome stared at the arrow for another moment before looking down at the priestess darkly. "All you ever manage to do is anger me…" she growled, and she descended upon Kikyo in a burst of black light and dust.

            Inuyasha rose to his feet, annoyed. "I keep losing it…" he murmured and he seemed confused by it. He lifted his head, sniffing, hoping to catch a small whiff of it but there was nothing. Only the night and approaching rain.

            "You are sure you had it before?" Miroku asked, resting on his staff.

            "I'm positive," Inuyasha growled, and he looked up at the moon. Halfway through the month. Since Sango had fixed the bone boomerang they had been searching for over a day, following Kagome's scent when it surfaced, which was not often. It would cling to a rock or a tree trunk but not across the grass or the soil.

            "How do you lose someone's scent?" Sango asked quietly. "Unless that person can fly-"

            "And we don't know she can't," Miroku said quickly. He glanced at Inuyasha as he spoke. "Her scent has been coming up a lot lately and who knows what kind of power the Shikon no Tama affords her-"

            "But, saying she can't. Fly, that is. How would her scent be on one thing but not another? If she crossed through this way-"

            "Naraku does this," Inuyasha whispered very quietly. And as they both looked at him, "He can make his scent appear like this."

            "If he's going through his stage…" Miroku said and his tone turned cautious. Warningly.

            "Or if he wants to be found," Inuyasha finished. And he searched the area once more, amber eyes flying about. The night was quiet, undisturbed, and there was very little sound. There was nothing but silence between the group and all of them looked about warily, Sango pulling forth her boomerang a bit.

            "Why wouldn't she want to be found now but have wanted it a moment ago?" she asked fearfully.

            Inuyasha began to lead once more, silver hair trailing behind his figure. "She doesn't want to be found. She's trying to show us something." And his tone softened. "Show _me_ something."

            The group followed, Miroku taking to the air with Sango on Kirara's back.

            _Of course she would want to show me something. She'd want to show me something painful. She'd want to lead me straight to my own death if she could. But no. If I were in Kagome's place, her state of mind, what would I do to hurt the person I hate? Who would I go after?_

            And at that moment he caught the copper-tasting scent of blood on the night breeze and he knew.

            _Kikyo._

Now we get into some good territory!  Mwa-hah-hah-

Ah, gomen, gomen!

Anyways, very quickly, _Fuko_ means Misery just so you all know. Or rather I hope it does. Imagine it doesn't? *Falls to the floor shrieking with laughter* Ah, well. My thanks to the following people for reviewing. I need to start answering questions and laughing at all your jokes because you ppl are damn funny! Ok, first off, Iseult because you're crazy! But I'm happy I move you. This isn't done yet and I know I'll have you gasping before the story ends. =) 

Is that an evil laugh I hear in the background..?

KayJuli – Am I going to kill off Kagome. _I'm_ not but Miroku might. You may not know this but I have a tendency to kill off beloved characters in my fanfiction and original fiction. *Looks innocent*

BronteJD – I'm just happy you got the chapters. I was like, "Shit, what am I doing wrong??" =)

Meamiko – Did ya finish it??

Hope and Harmony – Will there be a happy ending…let me muse over this for a moment…Well, it depends. How much do you like Kagome? Because for those who hate her… Oh, I'm sorry, toomuchinfo!

SimplyTurquoise – LMAO, see above re: Hope and Harmony. How much do _you_ like Kagome??

Saro – You're…understanding?? No, we can't have that! Must…go back…and put in more…confusion!

Quickening – Moving as fast as possible. And what do you have next on your plate??

KMF – You have been reviewing for so long I just wanted to really thank you! You were the first person to ever give me a review on the story and I'm happy you're still hanging on! Thanx!

Ok that's enough out of me. Hope you all liked it and hope I'm still alive after this is done to continue writing…

-Cassie


	16. Shi no Furiko

_Shi no Furiko_:

            She watched him from the trees, a small smile forming on her face as he moved, as he flew through the air as if he owned it. Such beauty. Such unparallel grace. All lithe silver movement, flashing amber. It made her heart beat, made her soar. Made her hungry.

            _Does it make you happy? To see him suffer?_

            She hesitated, tilting her head a bit. "Yes," she answered the voice after a moment, answered the air, the never-ending night. "It makes me happy because he shares my misery. Why should he be content when I suffer?"

            _He made you suffer…_

            "Yes," she answered again even though it hadn't been directed as a question. She hopped forward and was airborne for a moment, coming down silently on another branch. This was what it felt like for him, when he flew, when he sprang. Freedom of movement. Such freedom. She hated him for it. For always being able to but never knowing what it was like _not_ to. Even during his period of humanity, when he withdrew from the world around him to be by himself, even then he knew what it was even if he couldn't.

            _The Shikon no Tama allows you this movement. This freedom._

            She did not reply, hopping forward once more to keep up with the hanyou as he led the group. The Shikon no Tama allowed this and much more. Now that she knew how to control this jewel she could do anything she wished. Anything.

            _Do you see what I can give you? What I can bring to you? Awareness, my Priestess. It is, as they say, that knowledge is power. And your knowledge is never-ending. Limitless…_

            His voice ended in a hiss in her ear and she found herself flyng ahead of the hanyou, suddenly wanting to be there before he was, to see his face. She wanted to hover beside him, invisible to him, and she wanted to see the tears slip down his face, the anger form.

            She wanted to see the birth of his vengeance.

            The world shifted under her, around her, and she was suddenly there, standing above on a tree branch. Looking down, she cocked her head and she slowly sat, one leg drawn in to her chest, the other dangling.

            "He will come for me now," she whispered.

            _Yes._

            "And he'll want to kill me for this. He'll be so angry." She leaned her head upon her knee, embracing her leg tightly and suddenly feeling so very cold.

            _You will have nothing to worry about. She deserved it, remember? He deserves this, and much more._

            She heard noises far away, coming closer. Brush being shoved aside, the ground being trampled. She closed her eyes to listen to those sounds, to feel the beat of it, running through her like her own heart pounding.

            She smiled faintly. Sadly. "Hurry, my hanyou…"

            The wind whispered to her, in her ear, all around.

            _You are…afraid?_

            She inhaled deeply, tasting the world. Tasting the miko's blood on the soft breeze and relishing it. "I'm afraid to be alone. I don't like being alone…"

            _You are not alone. I am with you. I will be with you always. You and I…we will rule this world together._

            Kagome smiled faintly once more, just as the hanyou broke out of the forest below her. 

            _"Kikyo!"_

            The cry ripped from him, hoarse and ragged. He paused, his form stiffening to the point of breaking apart and he didn't want to see this again. Not like this.

            The white priestess hung suspended from the trees, cords of vine and root holding her up in the moonlight and she bled dark blood, her uniform soaked through. Pale-skinned, she hung silently, her clothes ripped at the shoulder and he _knew_. He already knew.

            _"My hanyou…my hanyou…"_

            Trembling, he took a step and he ignored the arrival of Kirara bearing the group, Sango's gasp and Miroku's small sound of disbelief. All he knew was that he couldn't seem to draw any closer. And yet he couldn't bear for the rest of the group to see her like that.

            _Kagome did this-_

            On weak legs he moved toward the priestess. In the shadow, with her back to the brilliant moon, she was a pale blue, blood smudged across her cheeks. And she was silent. The world itself was silent. His breath began to quicken and as he lifted a clawed hand to her he realized he trembled violently. Holding back shaky breaths he tore at the vines holding her suspended, seeing a sudden vision of Kagome suspended the same way by _him_, when he had nearly had his way with her. And he felt hot tears rise in his eyes.

            _Kagome didn't do this. I did this. I made her into this-_

            Kikyo came loose, slipping into his arms and he embraced her to him for a moment, his mouth pressed to her shoulder as he furiously blinked away his tears. Her blood was a potent stench and he had to swallow a few times to keep from vomiting. She was limp, her limbs hanging heavily, her head resting on his shoulder.

            And slowly, he lowered her to the ground, cradling her as if she was made of porcelain. She resembled it in the cool moonlight, the blood much too brilliant on her white cheeks. Kneeling beside her he hesitated, his clawed fist pressed to his mouth as he merely gazed at her. The same slash to the shoulder. The same ending. He inhaled to calm his trembling, to even out his breath.

            And Kikyo's eyes came open.

            Inuyasha gasped, recoiling a bit. Her eyes had glazed over a bit and she grimaced, gazing up at the moon with narrowed eyes. Her vision focused slowly and she turned her eyes away from the moonlight, wincing. "Oh…"

            "Kikyo?" Inuyasha leaned toward her, afraid to touch her.

            She turned her head to look at him upon hearing his voice and she focused on him, swallowing. Her breathing was raspy, her form slowly beginning to tremble, and she sighed as he reached out and placed a hand to her cheek. "Inuyasha…"

            "I'm here, Kikyo," he said to her quietly, fighting the tremor in his voice.

            She nodded faintly and as she gazed at him tears rose in her eyes. "An eye for an eye," she murmured. "A claw for a stab…" and her voice shook with her tears. "Inuyasha…she's so _angry…_"

            Inuyasha shushed her, reaching out with his other hand as well. "It's all right now, Kikyo. It's over-"

            "I knew what she would become," Kikyo whispered to him. "I felt the Shikon no Tama turning black and she…called to me…"

            Inuyasha frowned, lips parting as he tried to understand. 

            "She called for me…and I came," the miko said and her voice sounded distant. "She's been fighting for so long, how could I say no..? And so I went and I tried to kill her. Before she turned-"

            Inuyasha gazed at her, eyebrows drawn low over his eyes. And he let her speak, lifting her gently to cradle her in his lap.

            "But I didn't finish it. I went prepared, knowing…knowing that I would have to do everything I could to retrieve the Shikon no Tama. But you wouldn't allow me…" she stared at him, a tear running down her cheek, "and I knew it would hurt you…"

            Something rustled close by, leaves fluttering.

            "But I did it anyway…" Kikyo closed her eyes, inhaling shakily. Almost wheezing. "Oh…this wretched body…"

            Inuyasha's eyes shifted down to her stained clothes, to the weak frame underneath the layers and he felt his heart tighten, icy pain washing through him. But his expression softened tenderly and he nodded to her. "It isn't yours, Kikyo. Your real form passed a long time ago. It's all right to let go of this one as well…"

            She hesitated, gazing at him tearfully. And then, faintly, she smiled. A pure, beautiful smile like the one she used to smile so many years before. It stole his breath from him to see it once more.

            "I'm destined to be with you, Inuyasha…" she whispered, and she slowly, painfully, lifted a hand to his face, her fingers grazing his skin. He closed his eyes, pushing his cheek into her palm and her look was soft. "My Inuyasha. No matter what form, our souls are destined…"

            He swallowed. "They are…aren't they?" he questioned distantly.

            Kikyo's smile softened, and her hand fell away from his face. "Yes," she replied quietly. "In whatever form, this piece of a soul that was once mine…"

            Inuyasha's eyes opened slowly.

            "Let it be carried to her. Reunited with hers. This form no longer has use for it…"

            "Kikyo," he said in a breath, stiffening. And he cupped her face trembling, "Kikyo-" as she turned her face away. "_Kikyo!"_

            But she did not respond, her form limp, her eyes closed peacefully.

            He gazed at her, his lips parted, his entire frame going cold. And all around it was quiet. So quiet. His entire world had been quiet that day as well, had been quiet for fifty years after. And now it was silent once more. He shook her roughly, making a small sound and cringing inwardly as her head lolled.

            _Please, it can't be this quiet again. It can't-_

            A leaf fluttered by and he turned his attention to it dumbly, clutching the dead priestess in a painful grasp. Everything was suddenly wrong. The air had no taste and this world of silence nauseated him. He looked back down at Kikyo, trembling, and in his arms she seemed nothing more than a child. A dead child.

            With a snarl he rose, flinging her corpse to the ground and he whirled, furiously. _"Kagome!"_

            Behind him were Miroku and Sango, the exterminator holding a hand clasped over her mouth, tears in her eyes. "Inuyasha-" she whispered.

            _"Kagome!"_ he shouted once more, amber eyes narrowed into slits. "Show yourself!"

            "Inuyasha!" Miroku also said, his face pinched. He lifted a hand out to calm the hanyou.

            "Does it hurt?" came the voice then, floating upon a breeze. It echoed eerily, seeming to come from the trees, the ground, the sky, even Kikyo herself. Inuyasha straightened, looking around and she slowly came into being, standing only a few feet away.

            They all stared at her.

            "I said…" she whispered, coming closer, "does it hurt?"

            Inuyasha faced her, his entire form shaking, and he slowly pointed to the dead miko, his amber gaze caught on Kagome. And tears rose in those amber eyes, those pained eyes. "Why her and not me?"

            Kagome stared at him for a moment silently.

            _"Answer me!"_ he shouted wrathfully, causing the entire group to jump at the sound of his voice.

            Kagome clenched her jaw. "This _is_ you, Inuyasha," she replied. "I _am_ coming after you. Through everyone else. She was just the first. The prize."

            Inuyasha stared at her in disbelief, his hand dropping limply at his side.

            "Do you think this is over?" she questioned. "Do you think her death makes it complete?" she shook her head, eyes cold. "No, hanyou. Not even close…"

            Inuyasha took a step toward her, firm. "Then who else, Kagome? If you want me to hurt, _make me hurt._ But you come after me, no one else-"

            The girl practically rolled her eyes. "Stupid animal," she murmured. "I would get tired of hurting just you. I have a feeling you wouldn't even give me a small yelp if I tortured you. Where is the fun in that..?"

            Miroku glanced at Inuyasha.

            "We're nowhere near done. I still have many shards to collect to make this jewel whole again." She lifted her hand and cradled in her palm was the black Shikon no Tama. "Until then I will see you all again."

            And she turned, already growing transparent.

            "Kagome!" Inuyasha cried after her.

            But she disappeared upon a breeze, fading into the black night.

            Inuyasha took a senseless step after her but Miroku called to him, his face dark. "Inuyasha." The hanyou paused and looked at him and he said quietly, "She's done for the night. But she _is_ growing stronger. With the jewel complete we won't be able to stop her-"

            "Which means she'll go after Naraku," Inuyasha murmured and he glanced quickly at Sango.

            "_Kohaku!"_ she gasped in sudden realization.

            "And Kouga," Miroku added with an apprehensive look.

            Inuyasha nodded. And he turned away. "If you aren't up to it, don't follow. But I'm going after Kouga. Now." His face turned cold. "He and I have a little chat overdue anyway. And she'll leave off the strongest enemy for when she has the most shards."

            "We'll follow," Sango said quickly and as Miroku nodded she ushered him back toward Kirara.

The title means Death's Pendulum and I borrowed it off my sister. It's her email address and the name of her website. Anyways, I'm going to start putting in more cameos by other Inuyasha characters as we go because they're going to start playing big parts. And someone who reviewed had an idea about a character in the story that I haven't yet introduced but will play a part and she was right on, so if that person knows who I am referring to, _you go!!!_ LMAO! But I'm not going to name names so maybe some of you will be surprised while others will be like, "I knew it!!!"

Anyways, thank you, all of you, for leaving me reviews, you guys make me smile always. You make me want to write and it's the greatest feeling!

-Cassie

PS – 

For Tsukinoko – Actually both this site and my site have different chapters of the same story. My site hosts the lemons and fanfic has updated chapters. =) If you want the story in its entirety, up to what has been posted, just email me. =) And she never hit the ground because the youkai took over when she lost consciousness.

For Silvermoon Maru – Yes, Kouga will reappear again as will Sesshoumaru, Rin, Naraku…

For Iseult – No, this whole bout with schizophrenia is definitely the mixing of Kagome's true feelings, fears and uncertainties with the youkai's evil. She's feeling everything she's supposed to be feeling (what everyone feels at one time or another) and it's just being amplified, along with twisted by whatever face the youkai chooses to wear at the moment. Wow, doesn't it really seem like I know what I'm talking about?? LMAO! I'm kidding, that's really what's happening. =)

For Jezunya – Are you threatening me..? Ooooh, I like it, do it some more!! XD  What will Inuyasha's reaction be You just got it, babe! And I'm thinking Kagome is pissed off enough as it is, she doesn't need anymore!!!

For Cataluna – ROTFLMAO! This is for all Kikyo Bashers! *Ducks the flying food*****  _Hey!_

Hope and Harmony – A happy ending, still?? Well, I'll promise you that Inuyasha won't die-  well, actually, let me not promise that either… but if I can scare you anymore, Kagome and Inuyasha will meet up and fight their last battle around the time of the New Moon….  *walks off whistling innocently*

Arigato gozaimasu for all reviews! And feel free to email me any questions you guys might have, I'll answer anything just so long as I'm not asked for spoilers. =)


	17. Tsumetai Tamashii

_Tsumetai Tamashii_:

            Kouga sniffed slightly and suddenly lifted his head, a frown crossing his face. That scent was familiar. He had just smelled it not too long ago, soft and floral. He rose from his crouch and over the heads of his fellow villagers he saw Kagome, standing a bit far off. She wore the dog turd's haori and, from the way the wind played with it, nothing else. 

            Kagome looked at him, seeming a bit out of place. Wordlessly, and keeping her head bowed, she floated closer. The others slowly looked up as she came toward them and several broke into wide smiles.

            "Kagome nee-san!"

            She paused outside their circle, smiling gently. "Konban wa," she said quietly. "I'm sorry to suddenly appear like this, I didn't plan for this-"

            "Kagome," Kouga said in his rough voice, and he came around, scowling. "What are you doing here? And where are your clothes?"

            She motioned over her shoulder blindly, not bothering to even look to where she was gesturing. "It's a long story, Kouga-kun, and I would really like to speak to you about something if I could?"

            Kouga stared at her for a moment, almost suspiciously. And then he looked at his group as they all stared at Kagome's semi-nudeness. He barked at them and took hold of her arm, yanking her after him as he led her off. She followed, staggering along, and looking around blankly but purposefully.

            "What happened?" he asked impatiently and she glanced up as they entered into a dark and cool cave embedded inside a wall of rock and dirt. She felt a shiver pass through her and she glanced over her shoulder. They had left the group of wolves outside, still bustling about or lounging around. She hesitated, wondering if they would suddenly decide to come in after them for any reason but none seemed to be really remotely interested. Looking forward once more she found Kouga staring at her and she managed an innocent expression. "What?"

            Kouga frowned. And slowly, very slowly, his eyes narrowed and he also looked around. Suspiciously. He searched the entire cave with his eyes before looking back toward her and she blinked at him questioningly. He hesitated another moment, and then finally faced her directly.

            "Where's Inuyasha?"

            She stared at him, her lips parting to speak. And she felt them. The shards. She suddenly felt them as she hadn't been able to for what seemed like an eternity. She closed her eyes, allowing herself to float on the power they radiated and they gave off warmth around her legs. He had them in his legs, she remembered. She wanted that warmth, to hold it in her hands, cradle it to her heart. She felt so cold these days, so lonely. 

            _Imagine he had silver hair… wouldn't that be nice?_

            She lifted her head to open her eyes but he was still speaking to her and she realized that his voice was not the voice she wanted to hear. Just as rough and proud but not the same voice. She kept her eyes closed because of it.

            "Kagome, where is Inuyasha?"

            _Yes, that's his name, isn't it? Inuyasha?_

            She felt heady. The shards seemed to be reacting with the Shikon no Tama she had hanging around her neck and they both sent off so much power. It almost tickled, sweeping along and buzzing. Conflicting. A hand took hold of her wrist and yanked at her and she went dizzily, floating on the fumes of power. 

            _"Oy! Kagome!"_

            "Inuyasha…" she whispered, opening her eyes slowly. And he stood before her, his hand wrapped around her wrist, a frown on his face.

            "Falling asleep on me again?" he asked her mischievously. And he released her and backed away, long silver hair slipping along his shoulder and down his back like a shining curtain.

            "Inuyasha…" she said again and she reached out as he turned from her. Her hand caught a thick lock of his hair and he hesitated, turning his head to look at her over his shoulder with an impish expression on his face. Teasing. She stared at herself, holding his hair in her hand, and it was so smooth, so glossy. Soft. She trembled for a moment before slowly lifting her eyes to his face and he was arching a brow at her. "Inuyasha…are you real?"

            "Of course I am, _baka_," he growled at her but as he spoke there seemed to be a shadow of an image moving with him and the second image was darker, both in skin tone and hair color. But the first image superimposed over, the image of _Inuyasha,_ was now crossing his arms over his chest and he lifted his head haughtily, closing his eyes. "What else would I be?" And he turned to continue walking once more.

            "Inuyasha. _Iie-"_ she cried and she flung herself, almost flying on the waves of power that seemed to radiate from him and she caught him from behind, throwing her arms around him and clinging to his chest with shaking fingers. "Inuyasha!"

            _"Nani-"_ he said, caught by surprise, and he looked down at her over his shoulder. "What's wrong with you?"

            "It was such a bad dream," she whispered hazily, squinting through a misty wall of pink smoke, "I thought I had lost you. I dreamt that you had turned from me, that you still loved Kikyo and you had gone to her. And I killed her, Inuyasha! I killed her because then that would mean she couldn't have you. It would mean you couldn't go to her anymore-"

            Inuyasha turned in her embrace, frowning down at her, his amber eyes narrowed. "What?" he asked in a hoarse whisper.

            "I'm _sorry!_ I'm so sorry! I killed her. I killed her to keep you from her and I was scared and so lost. I was so lost-"

            "Kagome-" he said and he pulled free of her embrace, taking hold of her face between the palms of his clawed hands. "Kagome, shut up for a second and make some sense. You're rambling-"

            "But it's a dream. It's a dream, oh, it's a _dream…"_ she whispered and she felt tears rise in her eyes and fall down her cheeks, run into his thumbs.

            He stared at her, an eyebrow raised as she settled into silence. And she gazed at him through blurred vision, feeling the remnants of Shikon shards. "I feel them," she murmured to him, her eyes caught by his. "I feel them again. The Shikon shards. I feel them again-"

            "When did you stop?" he demanded. And his face turned almost impatient. "Oy, if you're losing your abilities-"

            "I'm not," she said with a shake of her head, her vision becoming pink once more. "I'm not. I feel them. The shards. I feel their power. It's making me warm…"

            Inuyasha cocked his head at her thoughtfully before nodding and he released her to look down at her. "Hey! Why are standing there half-naked?" and he sprang backward, crimson staining his cheeks, a hand automatically lifting to his neck. 

            Kagome looked down at the haori and she didn't understand why she wore it or what she had done before. She looked around and she didn't even know where she was, only that it was close to sundown by the rays of sunlight streaming in. She looked toward Inuyasha once more and he had turned his back on her, his hand having lifted to the back of his head. 

            "I want the haori back when you're done with it," he called to her, his frame stiff. "Where are your clothes anyway?"

            Kagome looked down at herself once more and she consciously lifted a hand to close the haori over her chest modestly. "I don't…know," she murmured. And she lifted her head to look at him, at his back and then his hair. So long and glossy. "But it doesn't matter anymore…"

            Inuyasha glanced over at her, his lips parting, his hand hesitating limply at the back of his head. And his eyes widened as she moved forward, her hands reaching out and forcing him around once more. He stared down at her, stiff, and looking very uncomfortable, to the point of almost being comical.

            "Oy, Kagome-"

            "You know you'll have me always, don't you? You know that?" she asked him frantically, clutching his white haori at the collar with shaking fists.

            His frown deepened.

            "Please tell me you know that," she whispered, and she pulled him down toward her, kissing him breathlessly, shutting her eyes. She didn't want to see the expression on his face. She just wanted him to feel her, all of her, and to feel her love for him. He didn't need eyes for that and neither did she. He just needed a heart.

            He broke the kiss, recoiling, and he seemed almost angry. Her eyes snapped open to look at him and there was suspicion on his face as he studied her silently, swallowing. And then his tongue flicked out, running over his bottom lip as his eyes floated down to her own mouth.

            Her eyebrows turned upward as he merely stared at her.

            And then, softly, he said, "I know," and his hands lifted to her face to grasp her and he pulled her into him, returning a kiss almost as desperate as hers had been. She found herself pulled off balance and she fell against him, staggering. He caught her with his own frame, trapping her face between his hands and she breathed into their kiss, clutching at his sleeves to regain her balance. He barely allowed her time, tilting his head a bit and deepening the kiss, his chest rising and falling heavily. She felt his breathlessness, the way he seemed to almost gasp against her, and she straightened against him, lifting her hands to her face and taking hold of his fingers. She pulled them from her face, breaking their kiss, and he didn't seem to want to pull away, resting his cheek against hers, his breath hot against her lips. She lowered his hands away, releasing them to wrap them around her hips and he swallowed a heavy breath, panting silently, winded. She was just as winded from that second kiss and they breathed the same air, nuzzling each other as she lifted her hands back up to wind around his shoulders. 

            "Is this…right?" he asked her faintly.

            _It has to be right. I need it to be right…_

            "Does it feel right?" she asked him reluctantly, almost afraid of his answer, her eyes shut to his, her cheek grazing his as he brushed his mouth against her jaw, dragging across her skin. He had such smooth skin, his hair just as soft, his caress light. She tilted her head upwards, pulling him closer, ever closer, and as she did so he wrenched her hips against his, his mouth creeping toward her mouth. She felt him through the haori, even through his pants, most especially as he trapped her against him, his hands hard on her hips.

            "It's always felt right-" he said in a hoarse breath and he met her lips once more, forcing them open under his. His tongue swept hers once and then again, bringing a small moan from her and she realized he was slowly dragging them backward, moving them both. She was forced to follow as he had her ensnared with his clawed hands and as they moved they brushed together, hips to hips, their lips breaking and reuniting with each movement. 

            Inuyasha's legs came up against a large rock protruding from the wall, exhaling on contact and she leaned into him, forcing him to hold her weight against his frame as she claimed another kiss. The caress seemed almost feverish, frantic, as if it was the only kiss they would ever be allowed, and she ground her hips against his, wanting more, more skin, more contact. He seemed to want the same thing, fighting against her as she tried to mold herself even more into him. But he also fought for balance, barely maintaining any even as she pushed against him even more. 

            And then a small cry came from him as he finally lost his balance and he fell backwards onto the stone, barely managing to break their fall with a hand. She also gasped, staggering once more, and she landed against him as he held himself upright against the stone. Her eyes came open wide and he was below her, one arm clutching her to him reassuringly, the other helping to regain his balance over the stone that rested between his parted legs.

            They both stared at the stone for a moment, wordlessly, heaving, all else silent except for their breathing. And then as Inuyasha lifted his head up once more their gaze met. And it was all it took. With a faint breath Kagome clutched him once more, dragging him up toward her for a possessive kiss, and he went with a low groan, slowly settling himself down upon the stone before wrapping his arm back around her waist. Beneath her he was all hard planes and angles, and she straddled him a bit, bending to him to maintain their frenetic kiss. 

            _This time? Will it happen this time?_

            He broke their kiss even as she thought it and she felt her heart go cold, her insides suddenly shivering. Fearfully she opened her eyes just as he asked, "Kagome?" And he was gazing up at her, hesitatingly. She sent him a questioning look, a frown slowly crossing her face as he merely stared at her, his amber eyes wide.

            "Nani?" she asked him quietly.

            He didn't respond to her question, his gaze caught on her face. But slowly, he released her waist, one hand lifting to the haori, and then the other hand. She bowed her head, watching his movements wordlessly, her throat dry. And he untied it, the folds falling open around her. She stiffened a bit worriedly as he did so, afraid, but he seemed oblivious to her reaction, shifting a bit to hold her above him better, and he lifted his gaze once more to her face, his arm sneaking under the haori to wrap around her waist.

            Uncertain, she settled on him once more, her hair falling down the sides of her face as she straddled him once more. Beneath her he shifted a bit more before finally pulling her down to him to kiss her, nipping at her gently. Such a small kiss. She sighed, tilting her head to him, and she arched against him, feeling his clawed hand as he dragged his fingers across the skin of her ribs achingly. The caress sent a shiver that bordered on delicious pain and she lifted her hand to his, moving his own hand upward to her breast. Kissing her gently, he cupped her, his tongue flicking against her mouth as she exhaled tremulously. His claws dug into her flesh, drawing a small whimper from her and his other hand rose also, shoving aside the folds of the haori to clasp her as well. 

            _Is this…_

            She dropped her hands to support herself above him, clutching surfaces of the stone beneath him, and he bent at the waist, rising to claim her mouth with a small moan. It was a breathless kiss, always, and it made her feel just as frenzied, her shoulders and limbs stiff and languid at once. She stretched as he touched her, as he kissed her, reveling in the feel of the air on her bare skin, the feel of his hands on her.

            The power of the Shikon shards hanging around them. It was intoxicating. The waves of power lifted around her, with the same warmth of heatwaves, and she lifted her head away from him, throwing it back and leaving him to brush his mouth against the underside of her chin, his hands clutching her achingly. 

            _Is this…real?_

            Inuyasha dropped away from her jaw, yanking her upward across his frame, across the folds of his clothes, and he turned his face to her breast, his tongue flicking out to taste her. She clenched, her lips parting, her thoughts a whirl of pleasure and disbelief. His breath was hot, his hair cool and silky, and her own flesh was flushed crimson from his caress, her frame nearly trembling. She wanted to stay like this forever, knowing it was him doing this, pleasuring her in this way. She lifted her hands to his shoulders, his hair, her hands tangling in his hair and holding him to her.

            _This is real._

            The sound of metal rang around her suddenly and she recognized the noise. It was the sound of a blade being drawn. Her eyes came open and she turned her head in the direction.

            Inuyasha stood at the mouth of the cave, his frame trembling, and he had the untransformed Tetsusaiga in his hand, pointed to the floor. Kagome stared in disbelieving confusion, her frame stiffening, and beneath her was movement. She whirled back around and looked down and below her lay Kouga, his eyebrows drawn together in a furious frown. 

            The world tipped and spun.

            _What…_

            "So…I was right from the beginning?" Inuyasha asked from the mouth of the cave, and he came forward, swinging the rusty sword in what was probably meant to be an offhand gesture. But his shoulders were much too stiff, his frame brimming with too much anger. And pain registered as well as he looked away from them both, eyes shifting to his swinging sword. His eyes narrowed, wounded, his gaze averted.

            Kagome quickly stood away from Kouga, shaking. And she looked from Kouga to Inuyasha and back again, the hairs on the back of her neck rising eerily.

            _What is this..?_

"I was right when I said what I did. About you and _him_," and he spat the end of his sentence, "when I said that you went to him because he would give it to you."

            Kouga rose menacingly, a small growl coming from him as he straightened.

            Kagome took a step back, lifting her hands to her head, tangling her fingers in her hair.

            "Because it really didn't take you long…" Inuyasha whispered dangerously. And his gaze was fixed on Kouga, his hand tightening on the blade.

            "You have no right to be here!" Kouga shouted. "She came back to _me_ even after she left with you! Get it through your thick skull, dog turd, she doesn't want _you_!" And he reached out and took hold of Kagome's wrist.

            Everything blurred in the next moment. Tetsusaiga instantly transformed, the thick blade coming to life. At the same moment, as Kouga's hand wrapped around Kagome's wrist, she screamed, her eyes squeezing shut, tears streaming down her face. And a moment after that, as Inuyasha swung the Tetsusaiga, black power broke from Kagome in one powerful blast. Pure force flung Inuyasha backward, Kouga easily flying into the nearest wall as well. Inuyasha landed across his back and slid, the Tetsusaiga slipping from his grasp and Kagome shrieked again, another powerful wave of black light breaking from her form. The force cracked against the walls of the cave, breaking the surfaces and littering chunks and stones to the floor.

            Inuyasha rose first, shaking pebbles and dust from his face and hair, and he lifted himself into a crouch weakly, looking up. To the side, Kouga slid out of the hole he had made in the wall with his body, and he fell to his knees, his frame trembling.

            And Kagome leaned against the opposite wall, her eyes still shut, her hands yanking on locks of her hair.

            "This isn't real…this isn't real…this isn't real…"

            "Kagome!" Inuyasha shouted at her and he rose to his feet, lunging for her. "Wake up! Snap out of it-"

            "Leave her alone!" Kouga ordered from where he crouched and he also dove forward, rising up before Inuyasha and landing a swift punch in the hanyou's jaw that sent him sideways. 

Inuyasha slid across the dusty cave floor, tasting blood in his mouth, and he whirled back around, fuming. "You have no idea what the hell is happening!" he yelled at the wolf and he moved once more, easily dodging another blow and ramming his shoulder into Kouga's stomach. And even as Kouga bent over with a wince Inuyasha was rising, the hilt of Tetsusaiga crashing against the corner of Kouga's mouth.

            The wolf crashed to the floor, blood streaming from his lips, fury glinting in his eyes. 

            Inuyasha straightened, jaw clenching, and he slowly looked over at Kagome, his grip on Tetsusaiga tightening. She still crouched against the wall, her face hidden by her hands and her hair, and he hesitated, uncertain, merely gazing at her.

            "Inuyasha-" Sango said and he looked over his shoulder to see Miroku and Sango at the mouth of the cave. The exterminator stood silently, Miroku beside her hunched wearily. 

And he shook his head at them. "No…" he whispered, amber eyes flashing.  
Sango stared at him, her face strained. _"Inuyasha-"_ she said again, her voice cracking. 

Kouga looked over as well and then back to Inuyasha, his eyes widening. "Inuyasha, _yamero-"_ he cried, a hand reaching out.

            With a pained look Inuyasha whirled, lifting Tetsusaiga, and he moved, bringing the sword down over his head toward Kagome.

            And then he froze, his eyes wide, as Tetsusaiga suddenly morphed, power seeping from the blade as it returned to its rusty counterpart. Inuyasha looked up, stunned, and the sword was still, tarnished. He came to a stop, lowering the blade to his face and slowly, he looked toward Kagome.

            Kagome lifted her head, her face dark under her hair. 

            His lips parting, Inuyasha backed away a step, Tetsusaiga falling at his side. And then he released it, allowing it to fall to the floor with a resounding clang.

            "You still can't kill me, Inuyasha," she whispered and she slowly rose to her feet, releasing her hair, her tear tracks drying on her face. "No matter how dangerous I am to you, you can't kill me with a sword sworn to protect _humans."_

            Inuyasha felt a shiver pass through his frame and he backed away another step, his teeth bared and glinting through his parted lips.

            Kouga stared at Kagome, his eyes wide in disbelief.

            She looked about, nodding to herself as she took in the cave around her. "I fooled myself…didn't I?" she asked quietly, rhetorically. "I allowed myself to believe…" and she looked down at Kouga where he was still sprawled on the floor. "I allowed myself to believe…"

            Inuyasha remained silent, merely staring at her. 

            Kagome's face saddened, her eyes dropping wearily. "It doesn't matter anymore, any of it. I can allow myself to believe it but I know the truth." And she lifted her gaze once more, turning it on Inuyasha. "And no matter how much she would have me believe I can still do right…I know I can't. Because it would mean I would go through everything again, the exact same way."

            Inuyasha gazed at her, his face stricken with sadness.

            Kagome looked back down at Kouga, her eyes slowly narrowing. And suddenly, she moved, flinging a hand up at Inuyasha. A pure blast of blackness swirled from her hand, almost like Miroku's Kazaana in its darkness, but instead of pulling him in it thrust him back. Inuyasha managed a growl before he was flung backwards once more, shoved to the ground and tossed away. 

            "Inuyasha!" came Sango's voice.

            Kagome's face morphed in fury and she dove at Kouga, taking hold of him by his armor and she opened her free hand to his face, her eyes swirling with black pupils. Kouga stared at her in disbelief, frozen. But then he grimaced and he craned his neck to look down, to see the shards in his legs glowing with a dark light. 

            "Kagome-" Inuyasha growled hoarsely and he rose, lunging forward.

            Kagome spun them both together, Kouga and herself, and Inuyasha found himself on the other side of them, Kouga blocking his way to Kagome. He glanced down as Kouga suddenly began to growl, the rumble hanging in the air and his shards were slowly being pulled from his legs, slipping little by little out of his skin.

            _"Kagome-"_ Kouga hissed, wincing painfully.

            Kagome ignored him, staring him in his face and slowly clenching her hand into a fist. She spun again as Inuyasha made to move around Kouga and she whispered, "You had better be ready to kill me, Inuyasha, because you won't like me when I'm _angry…"_

            Kouga stiffened, his eyes closing as he grimaced and he barked furiously, "Inuyasha! _Wake up! _Don't let her get the shards-"

            Inuyasha hesitated, glancing back toward Tetsusaiga. And in a biting tone he whispered, "Well, I never liked you anyway-" and he latched onto Kouga's shoulders with bared claws, digging into his flesh. Kouga made a small muffled sound of pain and in front of them Kagome's blackened eyes flickered angrily.

            With a snarl Inuyasha yanked Kouga's form, feeling blood well up as he dug his claws in further to maintain his grip and Kagome fumbled to hold him, her face blackening with rage.

            A ward suddenly flew through the air, floating, before suddenly pasting itself to Kagome's chest and she had a moment to gasp before power broke from the slip of paper, streaking down her figure and causing her to stiffen in pain. She shrieked angrily, releasing Kouga to recoil and she faltered as she lifted her hand to the ward to yank at it. It stuck on, a second wave of streaking power seizing her and Miroku shouted, "Inuyasha!"

            Inuyasha flung Kouga aside, hesitating and merely staring as Kagome fell to the floor, convulsing with forks of power.

            _"Inuyasha!"_

            With a pained grimace he lifted a hand, baring his bloody claws. _"Sankon Tetsusou!"_

            Kagome turned onto her back, her frame stiff and his claws lashed into her stomach and chest, ripping open skin and spraying blood across the cave floor. She cried out, shrieking, and her hands caught his wrist as he made to pull away. He stopped, eyes widening, and beneath him she turned her head to look at him, tears streaming down from her slit eyes.

            And she accused him with that glare.

            He recoiled from the gaze, wrenching at his hand but she held on, refusing to release him. And he felt her blood on his fingers, his claws, feeling as if the liquid burned him clear through. He yanked again, feeling iciness passed the burning inside, and his heart began to pound as she stayed clutching him, her frame trembling.

            "Do you see?" she asked him in a whisper, her eyes nothing but blackness, obsidian orbs. "I go through everything again. In the exact same way…"

            Inuyasha gazed at her, his own frame beginning to shake. Her blood hung around him, the scent. He tasted it on his tongue as if he lapped at it. She grimaced, convulsing, and a single drop of blood trailed from the corner of her mouth.

            _"Inuyasha!"_

            He ignored the cry from behind, ignored the sound of Kouga suddenly shouting. Beneath him Kagome stared at him, battered, and he bent to her and kissed her then, tears flooding his eyes. She made a small sound, shuddering against him but surrendering herself to the kiss nonetheless, and he could taste her blood on her lips, on his tongue as he clutched her to him with his free hand, holding her as if he would break without her.

            _Be careful, hanyou. There is nothing left of her for you to claim-_

            The feminine voice brought him to a halt and, under him, Kagome turned her face away from his. He stared down at her, his tongue lapping away the stained blood on the corner of his mouth.

            And her hand released his to crash against his chest. He had a moment to look down before a strong wave of dark power seized him and flung him off her. He let out a startled cry and he rammed against another body, slamming to the floor in a tangle of limbs and sliding. Grimacing he rolled onto his knees and glanced over to see Sango sprawled beside him, pain registering on her face.

            Kagome rose onto her rear, her muscles trembling, and she suddenly gestured roughly.

            The shards ripped from Kouga's legs, bringing a cry from his mouth, and they flew to her hand, rippling with dark power. As they settled into her palm they darkened momentarily before vanishing, and the Shikon no Tama blazed as the shards were joined with the jewel.

            Inuyasha laid a hand on Sango's shoulder to check her but she motioned him on, slowly rising onto her hip. Lifting himself into a crouch he whirled to face Kagome and she was rising also, a hand lifted to her stomach. Miroku took a step forward, motioning with his staff, and the ward sparked once more, bringing Kagome's gaze to rest on him. Growling almost like a rabid animal she took a hold of the ward, ignoring the streaking forks of blue power and she yanked it off her chest, crumpling it in her palm.

            Miroku recoiled a bit, his teeth bared through his parted lips.

            "You humor me," Kagome whispered and she plunged her hands into her gashes, staining her pale skin with the fluid. Inuyasha watched her, tasting the same fluid on his tongue still and suddenly nauseated by it. 

            With a single graceful gesture, Kagome flung her hand up. And blades of dark crimson power burst from her hand, darkening to shards of black light.

            Miroku made a small sound of surprise, Inuyasha there with him, and he stabbed downward with his staff instantly, closing his eyes from the attack. But pure wind rose around him, a barrier against the shards, and they were deflected, spinning outwards and glancing off the cave walls, even nicking Inuyasha as he lifted a hand to guard himself.

            The wind died away into nothingness around them, Kagome standing in cold silence, and with a faint sigh of weariness Miroku lowered his staff limply.

            "You can't compete with my power, Miroku-sama," Kagome said to him and for a moment she sounded mournful. He looked at her, frowning, and she stood still, merely gazing at him. "None of you can. It's better you not try-"

            "Kagome-sama-" Miroku said.

            "It will not end here," she continued speaking, as if he had not interrupted her. And her eyes shifted to Inuyasha as he rose to his feet slowly, warily. "Not now that I know how far you would go to stop me."

            The hanyou didn't reply, Miroku glaring coldly. 

            With one last look she turned away from them and the dusty whirls of black power rose once more, enveloping her as she floated away. Her hair rose with the gentle breeze and she faded into that blackness, vanishing.

            With a pained breath Miroku fell to his knees, his staff clattering to the ground beside him as he hunched forward. Inuyasha collapsed beside him just as weakly, and Miroku lifted his head to him, parting his lips to speak. And he froze as Inuyasha lifted his hands to his face, claws dragging across face.

            "Inuyasha-" Miroku questioned, eyebrows arching.

            "I tried to kill her…" he whispered from behind his hands, his frame shaking. And with a sudden, resounding growl he tore his hands from his face and brought them down in fists against the cave floor, punching holes into the rock. 

            Miroku moved as he went to bring his fists down again, reaching out and staying his arms. "Enough-" he ordered, and the hanyou came to a halt, his eyes transfixed on the Tetsusaiga where it rested several feet away. "It was for the good of it. With the Shikon no Tama black there is no hope, no chance of Kagome turning good. Not on her own. We need to help her, make her see-"

            And the Tetsusaiga suddenly slid across the ground, coming to a stop at Inuyasha's knee where he crouched. Miroku broke off, staring at the sword and slowly raising his eyes to the hanyou.

            "I tried to kill her…" Inuyasha whispered mournfully.

Man, did I take forever or what? I'm really sorry it took me so long to put this out but a LOT of stuff went down and it's such a big mess. But here, the title means Cold Spirit/Cold Soul and it's a bit on the NC-17 side but not to the point that it should be rated as such. This chapter is going up in a hurry because I won't have time to do it later but please read and review, I hope you guys are still with me and for all those who left me a review, thanks very much!

-Cassie


	18. Shiki

_Shiki:_

            Kagome alighted on a tree branch, reappearing to the world, and as she became solid she suddenly felt the pain and the heaviness of her wound. With a grimace of agony she fell forward, nearly falling from the tree branch. She caught herself on the trunk, hunching over the wound and she slowly slid down to plop down on her rear, exhaling raspily.

            "What happened back there?" she demanded, wincing as she settled wearily.

            _I don't understand the question…_

            "You don't understand the question…" she growled, face darkening. She made a small hissing sound as she pulled back her soiled hand to stare at it, bending in her fingers weakly. "Don't play games. What happened? It was him, I felt him, I tasted him! And then it was Kouga."

            The voice in her head was silent for a moment but she felt his amusement. Yes, indeed, how so very amusing it must have been for him. She leaned sideways into the trunk, resting her head against the bark and breathing deeply, her hand falling limply into her lap.

            _You knew it was the wolf. You made yourself believe it was your beloved hanyou. I had no part of that, my love. It was all you…and your petty weakness…_

            Kagome's eyes closed as he spoke, as his voice hovered around her. And she lifted her face to the sunset, feeling the last waves of the warmth that had accompanied the day. It always became so cold at night. She felt the iciness so deep inside as if she herself were made of night. Blue-black, cold and silent. 

            _Petty weakness…_

            "Am I not allowed that?" she asked quietly, cradling her stained hand in her lap and feeling her fluid as her fingers slid across each other. Was she not allowed anything, even after everything that had transpired? Behind her closed eyelids were nothing but blackness and pulsing waves of a darker blackness. The pulsing was in time with her heartbeat and she breathed into herself, listening to her heart pound. She had been under the impression her heart had given up beating. She knew deep inside that her heart had stopped _caring_.

            _I cannot continue to protect you if you allow yourself to fall to your every desire. Is it more important to have a moment, a second, of the hanyou's embrace, or does it matter more to have a lifetime of vengeance?_

            Her eyes came open as the sun finally set behind the mountains far off and her vision blurred at the mere beauty of it. She remembered days and nights, mornings when the sun rose and she had sat by his side to witness it. And evenings when the sun had fallen low and he had been beside her still. She remembered leaning against him, falling asleep on his shoulder, even remembered him spluttering at their closeness. And she had smiled in her sleep at the tongue-tied excuses he had flung at her. He had been so beautiful, then. She exhaled mournfully, resting against the hard trunk and allowing herself to believe it was him still. 

            _"I want the one moment…"_

            And she allowed herself to believe that when she awoke he would be at her side still, watching the sunrise with her and wrapping his arm around her as she slept into the morning.

            It rained gently. Soft drops pattered the soft grass, slid down the green blades as the wind played across the ground. And all around him he felt her presence, in his arms, in his heart. As if she called to him, no matter how far away she was from him then. He lifted his gaze to the cloudy night sky, feeling the drops of rainwater trail down his face, drip onto his neck and under his clothes. There were moments like these when he couldn't breathe, when every inhalation burned inside him. This was one of the moments and it hurt him to understand, for all the other moments had been when he had caught her scent on a gentle breeze. Her scent was nowhere near him now, and he felt alone, gazing up at the empty sky and knowing that inside…he was just as empty.

            Behind him came the soft voices of his friends and he looked toward them reluctantly, knowing what he would see. And yes, it was so. His amber gaze came to rest on them, stared at them. The exterminator had been hurt in the encounter in the cave, bruised. And he watched her as she leaned against the monk, as he embraced her to him. As they supported each other. And he didn't want to see it. 

            He didn't want to feel alone, even surrounded.

            Turning back to face the cloudy sky once more he bent his head and lifted his clawed hand. If he allowed his mind to wander he could almost see the blood still. He could almost believe that it still stained his flesh, had dried on his claws. And if he closed his eyes from the sight of his hand he could almost taste it on his tongue still. He could taste her as surely as if he embraced her that very moment, as if he ran his tongue over her soft skin. He lifted his face, his eyes closed, and the breeze tasted like her as well. 

            He chuckled inwardly, not feeling a hint of humor. How painful, to feel cursed, to be punished always through the simplest means. If he always smelled her on the breeze, if he always tasted her on his tongue, would he still be able to breathe the air? Would he be able to enjoy the taste of meat, fruits? If she was never to be at his side again, could he go on knowing that he would be eternally punished to sense her, taste her, in everything everywhere?

            Could he go on?

            Another scent assaulted him then and he had a moment to collect himself before he opened his eyes. And they narrowed, his head bowing, as the figure came to stand beside him.

            "I don't want you here," he whispered faintly, his amber eyes flashing as he struggled to control the anger that threatened to break over him. He lifted a hand to Tetsusaiga at his side, but he merely gripped the hilt, his gaze absentminded and distant. 

            "I didn't know anything," Kouga said quietly, his frame stiff.

            _I don't want to hear this. I don't want to hear this…_

            "When she came she was just as miserable as when she had left with you the first time," the wolf said, his arms crossed over his chest. "And I promised myself that I would kill you if it came down to it. Because you don't deserve her. You never did-"

            "Neither did you," Inuyasha growled quietly. "You are always in the way, always somehow a step ahead and a level above me. No matter how much I _loved_ her, it always seemed as if she didn't understand. As if she didn't see…" And he broke off, his lips parting.

            _As if she didn't see…_

            _"See me…"_

            "She always saw you," Kouga murmured, his head bowing. "With everything I ever did to make her see _me,_ she always saw you. She was kind to me, _tolerated_ me, but she didn't care for me the way she cared for you. And I hate you for it, Inuyasha." 

            Inuyasha turned his head to look at him, eyes widening under his frown as the wolf shook with what could have been anger or pain. 

            "I hate you for it," Kouga whispered again, his gaze averted. "I hate that she can see only you, that she would be with me but call for you instead. And I hate that you would choose someone else above her."

            Inuyasha grimaced at the sound of his voice, at the accusation. 

            "But what I hate most…" Kouga said in the faintest voice, "is that the moment you feared she wished to stop seeing you, you claimed her for your own." And he only then lifted his head to glare at the hanyou, anger forming there on his young face. "But…she never did stop seeing you, did she? She never stopped wanting you, even through all this. Even now, through all this darkness…" he shook his head as if he couldn't understand and he merely stared at the hanyou, studying his face, his every angle and feature. "Some things won't ever change. Even now, you're still all she sees…"

            And with that he turned his head and walked away silently, padding softly into the night.

            Inuyasha didn't turn his head to follow him, instead turning to face forward once more, the rain falling on him still. And he allowed himself to taste her on his tongue still, to smell her even though she was so far away.

            _Wake up…_

            She didn't want to wake up. Passed the darkness surrounding her, passed the comfortable blackness of it all, she knew there was only pain to awaken to. And she didn't want the pain anymore. She didn't want the feeling of aloneness, not anymore. It was such a heavy burden to carry, such a painful burden to bear. She didn't want it anymore…

            _Wake up…_

            Her eyes came open and she floated in darkness. She had been mistaken. The darkness wasn't inside her. It was outside of her. She looked about with hooded, heavy eyes, making a small sound of weary confusion as she focused on darkness and then more darkness. Her hands floated at her sides, lifting up and falling, waving as if she lay upon the surface of peaceful water. She felt light in this space, calm. Serene. She hadn't felt this way in so long. And it wasn't because of any inner peace she had inside herself.

            It came from _her._

            _You know who I am?_

            She nodded at nothingness, her eyes closing momentarily. She felt as if she had only now woken up from a long sleep and the sleep continued to reach for her with long, slender tendrils for fingers. She forced her eyes open, sighing, and she parted her lips to murmur.

            _Do not say my name. He suspects and you will awaken him. Sit with me for a moment. Speak to me and let all your fears go…_

            Kagome exhaled, her head rolling to the side, and she whispered, "I have no fears. I am not allowed to have fears. Fear will ruin me…" The darkness was so thick, surrounding her, sustaining her. Like a fluffy mattress under her sore and weary form. 

            _We all fear. Without emotion we are not alive. Without fear we will not struggle. And without courage we will not overcome…_

            Overcome. There was nothing to overcome. She was at peace, finally. After so long, she was at peace. She didn't want to be dragged back to the pain and the sorrow. She wanted to be left here, away from it all. Left to herself.

            _But he is not here with you. And isn't that what you want in the end? Isn't he the one you always fought for? The one you wished to help? Is he…not worth the effort?_

            "He…" Kagome whispered faintly, swallowing a thick ball in her throat. "He is the one who hurt me. He betrayed me. He never loved me the way I loved him-"

            _Oh, Kagome… you still don't understand. And you won't understand if you stay here. You will wither away here…_

            Would she really? She frowned faintly, squinting into the darkness, and there in the blackness surrounding her, were faint shadows. She inhaled, forcing herself to awaken and as she did so she found her figure slowly straightening, floating upward in the blackness. 

            _You need to overcome. I cannot protect you against all of it. I am failing my battles as well and soon I will cease to exist. When that happens you will be alone and your power is great. Use it wisely. Use it because it is your decision. No one else's._

            A faint blue light sparked around her in the darkness then, forking streaks of power shooting up her stiff form, stinging her skin. She grimaced, turning her face away. And then she felt the presence, the powerful black presence and around her the world came into being once more. The moon was hidden behind the black shadows of waving trees and she was caught between worlds, between warmth and wintry night. 

            _Do not allow him to sway you! You are in control of yourself, fight for it! Fight for yourself! Fight for Inuyasha-_

            Her eyes came open fully at the mention of the name and she found herself lying on cold grass, shivering. 

            _Shiki! The four seasons…the four faces…_

            The woman's voice was growing faint and she realized she had missed a good chunk of her sentence. She shook her head in confusion, straining to hear the feminine voice but she grew fainter, blowing away.

            _The four…the Shikon no Tama…jewel of four souls…shiki…shiki…_

            And then came the rush, the furious rush of blackness and Kagome felt his anger before he even spoke to her. She automatically cringed away from the mental voice, her hands lifting to her ears.

            _Who is it that you speak to? How **dare** you plot behind my back when all I do is care for you, watch out for you and comfort **you!** _

            Kagome winced at the force of his anger. He literally made her shake from the strength of his rage, her ears ringing as he shouted at her, berated her.

            "I wasn't speaking to anyone. I wasn't-"

            _You're lying! Do you think I can't sense the other one? You hold her close to you, hiding her from me but I sense her! I see her through you! And you try my **patience! **_****

            Kagome shook her head, gritting her teeth, and it was useless to cover her ears when his voice sounded in her mind. He was everywhere inside her, the darkness inside, and to physically protect herself from him was futile. Stupid.

            _You have no **idea** what I do for you, what I-_

            "Shiki…" she whispered. And as the voice froze instantly inside her, breaking off, she said it again, trembling. "Shiki…"

            He remained silent inside her, but she sensed his surprise, hovering inside. If he had had a body, a form to look upon she knew he would have been stiff, his mouth open against a sentence that wouldn't come out. Her eyes came open slowly to gaze at the dark forest she lay in, hesitating. Afraid to say anything more.

            _How did you know-_

            "That's your name," Kagome uttered faintly, her fingers cramping at the sides of her face. "That's your name…"

            The voice inside withdrew, she felt it, and she reached out blindly for him, into the darkness that he lived inside. "Shiki! The four seasons! A season for each face! That's your name-"

            _Did she tell you that? Did she tell you that?_

            "She knows you by name, knows you by face. She knows you-" Kagome cried into the silent night.

            _She knows nothing! She's a simple priestess! She's as bad as Kikyo!_

            Kagome froze.

            _Yes, remember Kikyo? Remember everything she did to you? This woman is just as bad, and just as determined. She will turn you from me, she will make you return to the hanyou, and she will make you his victim once more! And she will try to convince you with just enough truth that you will believe her._

            Kagome slowly pulled her hands from her ears, her form shaking still. Just enough truth. "So, your name is Shiki, then?" she asked fearfully.

            The voice was hesitant in her ear, thoughtful.

            _Perhaps once, yes. So many years ago, my name was that. But I left that behind just as you slowly leave your own name behind. Who are you now? Are you still Kagome? Or have you finally relieved yourself of that name and all the vestiges contained therein?_

            She paused at his question.

            Was she really Kagome anymore? Was she really…anyone anymore? Did she deserve to have a name? 

            _Eventually, your name will be one of greatness. You will be addressed as the Goddess that you are. How simple is a title such as Priestess when you can be so much more? You can be the Bringer, the Messiah. That and more. And you will have hundred, thousands, bowing before you, murmuring your name in fear and reverence. Your name will be on their lips when they are afraid, when they are in need. And in the end, isn't that what you wanted? To be needed? _

            She swallowed, slowly rising onto her rear.

            No. In the end, all she had wanted was to be seen.

            _Come, my Goddess. There is much left to be done and so little time to do it._

            Kagome's gaze saddened and wordlessly, she rose to her feet. The haori fluttered open around her frame and she looked down to her torso so see nothing but nude flesh. Healed nude flesh. With a cold hand she ran her fingers over her smooth skin.

            "Have I been unconscious long?" she questioned quietly.

            _A little over a week. I've cared for you, though, healed your wounds. How easy it is to mend flesh._

            Kagome nodded to herself and slowly let her hand drop away, looking about at her surroundings. 

            _You have very few shards left to collect. Shall we begin again?_

            Retying the haori she nodded once more. "Yes. We will begin again. But I wish to make a stop before continuing."

            _A stop?_

            A stop. She needed to make a stop for herself. To see if she could save herself. And she could only think of one person who would be strong enough to help her, even though she knew he wouldn't wish to.

            Wordlessly, she turned and stalked off.

            The girl paused by the pond, stooping to drink from it. She was adorable, so pretty and sweet. Kagome stared at her, tilting her head silently in the darkness as the girl rose once more and skipped along cheerfully. Was her master here with her? He was strong enough, stronger than the hanyou. Would he be able to help her?

            _Why do you need help?_

            Jaw clenching, she closed her eyes to focus, to block away the voice. There was too much noise around her, not allowing her to think. She had told herself the entire way here that she needed his help, that he would be able to help her. And he would, one way or another. Either he would help her break free or she would devour him and have him fuel her power. One road split in two and she could only walk the one path. She couldn't control the jewel, not yet. She needed to become stronger. She needed more power. Which meant she needed to draw the girl's master out.

            Would killing the girl really draw him out?

            The girl crouched once more, not far off, and she pulled a small flower free, beaming. "Ah…" she gasped shrilly and Kagome gazed at her in surprise. How the smallest things affected children. 

            When had she lost the ability to be affected by _anything?_

            _If you're going to do it, then do it already. One thing I hate more than half demons with silver hair…are children._

            Indeed.

            Silently, Kagome fell from the tree branch, landing in a crouch without so much as the whisper of a sound. Moving faster that she had ever been able to she dove forward, feeling the wind in her hair, the haori as it fluttered around her nimble frame. Even if the girl could have seen invisible creatures she wouldn't have been able to move fast enough to protect herself. She smiled faintly to herself, already stretching out her fingers and feeling the girl's blood on her hands. She reveled in it already.

            The girl paused and suddenly lifted her head to the side as she caught sight of something and her expression brightened. "Sesshoumaru-sama!" she squeaked. And the happiness on her face vanished as she merely stared in growing confusion.

            Kagome turned her head as well to see where she looked and a moment later she realized she shouldn't have as a tall, hard wall appeared before the girl. She rammed headlong into it and was flung backward from the impact, stumbling. A moment later a windingly long green flash of light cracked against her skin and she cried out as pain welled up inside her. She fell to the ground, wincing, and the pain sharpened, stinging her.

            _P…pain?_

            The glowing green whip cracked again, striking the bare skin of her legs and, angrily, she recoiled, automatically lifting her hands to block her face from the same abuse.

            "Sesshoumaru-sama!" the girl cried once more, all happiness removed from her face and as Kagome looked up through slit eyes she saw the girl hide behind the figure of a tall man with flowing silver hair. The girl stared down at her fearfully, clutching at the man and she returned a glare, jaw clenching as the whip cracked once more, dangerously close to her face.

            The man stood silently, his green whip flowing lazily from his clawed fingers like a cat's tail before it pounced. His amber eyes locked on her blankly, haughtily, and she rose slowly before him, aching from the punishment her figure had taken.

            "Sesshoumaru…" she whispered.

            The man's eyes narrowed. "Do not use my name so comfortably," he said in a regal tone, yet dark and sinister. "You and I are not friends."

            Kagome backed away a step and looked down at her lashed legs. The haori had protected her upper body but all her bared skin had been slashed. She grimaced as her blood ran dark and thick.

            "Sesshoumaru-sama…" the girl whispered from behind the demon.

            He ignored the girl, merely staring at Kagome. "You are the human," he said quietly, looking down upon her with a cold look. He seemed perfectly at ease to be standing before her, comfortable having a young mortal girl clutching at him fearfully. He tilted his head at her slowly. "The mortal Inuyasha… treasures."

            Kagome glared at him, ignoring the stinging pain of her gashes. "Don't make me laugh," she said shortly.

            The youkai lord studied her for a long moment, looking into her eyes, and under his scrutiny she felt the same fear, the same _inferiority,_ that she felt having the youkai in her head. She tried to maintain her stare but the mere gaze that she struggled to meet froze her in place.

            He was powerful, she understood then. Only then.

            With a degree of impatience he turned away from her, leaving the child still where she stood, still frozen in fear. "Rin," he said after a moment in a curt tone, "come."

            With a small squeak the girl whirled and ran to keep up with him.

            "I need your help," Kagome called to him quickly, taking a step to follow after him.

            He didn't even slow his step. "With that jewel of power around your neck, you need no one's help." And he hesitated for the smallest instant. "Nor will anyone help you."

            Kagome paused uncertainly, searching her thoughts for something to say to stop him from leaving. The girl glanced backward, stumbling after the silver-haired demon and Kagome cried out thoughtlessly, "We can join forces, you and I, Sesshoumaru! You can have my jewel at your command-"

            "I have no need of that jewel," he cut her off, stopping and turning to look at her over his shoulder. "And the jewel has no need of me. Everything you promise me I can have on my own-"

            "People bowing before you? All the lands, all the nations, bowing to you! Power at your fingertips! Your vengeance against your brother!"

            He stared at her with a small frown, silent for a moment. "And that's what this is all about, is it not? Vengeance against my miserable half brother. But not my vengeance." And he smiled faintly, so very faintly. _"Yours."_

            Kagome stared at him, silent. 

            "I've been proposed this many times," he said to her stonily. "You offer me nothing I don't already have. And your offer pales in comparison to everything else." He shrugged indifferently, eyes hooded. "If you want your vengeance, have it by your own hand."

            And he turned once more to saunter off.

            "You won't help me then?" Kagome asked, and she already felt the power of the Shikon no Tama rising inside of her. Her vision dimmed, her pupils breaking free and swirling open to envelop her eyes entirely.

            Sesshoumaru continued on and behind him Rin cast one last look at Kagome. Her face paled, her glance turning into a stare and she whirled toward her master frantically. "Sesshoumaru-sama!"

            From Kagome's hands formed long whips of black energy, surging to life, swirling and slapping the ground roughly before she swung them both.

            Rin shrieked fearfully, immediately backing away a step and hiding her face in her hands.

            But moving faster than she had ever seen Inuyasha move, Sesshoumaru appeared at the girl's side, taking one lash of her whip across his face, his own whip deflecting the second attack. His face was forced to the side from her first whip strike and as he turned to meet her gaze once more the gash swelled up and bled forth a tiny drop of blood. Beside him Rin buried herself against his waist, clutching him, eyes shining with brightly unshed tears.

            Kagome smiled darkly at Sesshoumaru, snapping both whips against the ground. "I failed to mention it, didn't I? Anything you use against me, any attack, I can use myself. I can use them without feeling the sting of your attack but the creativity amuses me. What else do you have up your sleeve? Other than a missing arm?"

            Rin looked up toward Sesshoumaru in panic.

            The youkai straightened, slashing his own whip across the ground wordlessly.

            Kagome tilted her head at him, coming closer. "Is that all you have then? One whip?" Her eyes dropped to his swords, gaze hesitating on the Tenseiga with a small gleam. "I can give you the Tetsusaiga."

            Sesshoumaru did not seem interested. "As much as the offer…amuses me, I won't work under, nor with, a human. You've chosen the wrong brother to ask for help."

            "I want him destroyed!" she shouted at him furiously, snapping the whips ate him once more, pulling her attacks. Rin scrunched closer to the demon and Kagome's anger flared, the Shikon no Tama glittering. "I want there to be nothing more than the shell of the hanyou! I want-"

            "You want _him,"_ he cut her off, coming close to barking. His eyes narrowed, anger only then forming on his face. "Your excuses are meaningless. And you waste my time." His voice dropped low. "I don't like having my time wasted."

            Kagome's face blackened. "Then let us not waste any more of it." And she dove forward, snapping the whips and swinging.

Ok so I'm veeeery close to finishing this fic, thank God! I know a lot of you are like, "You bitch! Hurry up!" Yeah, yeah, I hear you, LMAO! Anyways, I'm putting this up because this is a pretty important chapter. ALSO! I finally got into Cowboy Bebop to the point that I'm going crazy with the anime (please someone tell me there are plans to make more episodes or _something!_) so I am also putting up a story in that section (a one shot for Spike and Faye, the coolest couple next to Inuyasha and Kagome!) in case you guys want to check it out. It's plenty dark (you all know that's how I like it) and I'm not putting up the entire lemon chapter, just the beginning of it and then if you guys want to read the rest you can stop by my site to finish it. Sound good?

Ok well, thanks for reviewing me, ppl! And hope you enjoy both fics! =)

-Cassie


	19. Seishi

_Seishi_:

            Eyes narrowing, Sesshoumaru yanked himself free of Rin, his stance defensive and he swung his whip, clashing against both of Kagome's angrily. Sparks burst from the contact, illuminating the night and Kagome swung again, wildly, almost flailing. She didn't know how to control whips, had never had practice with them and the more she fought the more realization hit that Sesshoumaru knew how to use his only too well. He deflected each of her attacks with his own, seemingly bored as the cracking of whips rang in the night. Furiously, she attacked blindly, snapping her whips in an effort, _a single effort_, to reach him.

            With one gesture, Sesshoumaru batted away her whips and, darting quickly, he swung offensively. His whip cracked against her face, slashing her open and she let out a muffled cry, recoiling away. The blood welled up and ran as she paused, trembling, and as she lifted her hand to her face she realized he hadn't wasted his time. He was suddenly before her, his whip vanishing as he took hold of her by the neck. She choked instinctively, eyes squeezing shut and she heard his voice close to her as he hissed, "I detest the touch of humans but I'm sure the acid will handle the problem."

            And her neck began to burn. Her flesh seared from the contact of his skin against hers. Effortlessly, he hoisted her up into the air, his fingers clamping tight, nails digging into the flesh of her throat. And passed the acid burning away her skin she found she couldn't breathe. Gasping, she lifted her hands and swung the whips blindly, frantically. They connected, she felt them _connect_, but squeezing her eyes open she saw that he remained still, as if unaffected, even as her whips slashed open gashes on his face, his arm. His gaze remained cold, if nothing else only darkening, and for the first time in what felt like an eternity, she felt utter terror overwhelm her. She struggled vainly, knowing that she wouldn't be able to break his grip, and her air was finally pinched off entirely, his hand squeezing shut.

            _Don't be foolish._

            She closed her eyes once more, trying for a breath, one single breath, and at being denied that she began to heave, gasping shortly. Her whips vanished away as she lifted her hands to pry at his fingers and as panic set in she felt the power rise, overwhelm her. All sound suddenly became quiet, except for the quiet weeping that came from Rin. And from inside her came a muffled roar, rising up.

            A blast of pure energy broke from her figure, momentarily startling Sesshoumaru. He prepared for another one and a moment later it came bursting outward, Kagome shrieking with the release. But the second was a prolonged attack and the youkai growled under his breath as he felt his skin begin to sting, burn. His face blackened with fury, his teeth glinting as he applied enough pressure to crush all the bones in her throat to dust but her attack only strengthened, her eyes black with power. 

            With a ferocious hiss, Sesshoumaru released her neck, backing away as the darkness swarmed around him like a blowing wind and he felt the energy of it, the pure furious darkness. Falling back he covered his head with his only arm, his hair blowing about his face as he glared at the human. And she wasn't even awake, he realized as he stared at her. Her eyes were glazed over, lost in blackness, her lips parted. Before his eyes her skin healed over without a blemish, the haori floating about her frame.

            This would prove to be difficult.

            Straightening, Sesshoumaru dropped his hand away, ignoring the burning winds, and his eyes widened, crimson darkness sweeping his pupils, his irises. He felt his form shift, his features protrude, and he was forced to his knees, breaking from his human shell and increasing in size. With a murmured growl he grew, a snout forming, losing any semblance of humanity and behind him Rin stared up in awe, her mouth hanging open. 

            Completing his transformation he looked down upon the girl, his body that of a large white canine demon, hissing and growling.

            Kagome stared up as well, her face becoming purposeful and the winds blowing around her increased, shoving aside all things not rooted to the ground. With a squeak, Rin felt her feet slide out from under her and she toppled face down to the ground, her fingers reaching out to latch onto dirt. It was loose, rolling under her fingers and she felt herself slide further, trailing.

            With barely a look away from Kagome Sesshoumaru lifted a large paw and brought it down on Rin, trapping her to the floor, and she let out a sigh inside the cover of his paw, murmuring, "Arigato…"

            Kagome turned her face to Sesshoumaru, her hair blowing about her face and neck, and she pointed to him silently.

            Black power burst from her form, striking the ground roughly and streaking across it, breaking up earth and flinging dirt as it flew. The land trembled from the attack, her form swaying slightly and Sesshoumaru braced against the power, his body a formidable wall against it as it forked and struck him head on. He made a small sound, his fur blackened where he had been struck, and he let loose a furious bark before tossing Rin away from his foot and snapping at Kagome with sharp, white teeth. 

            Kagome's lips drew back as he caught her by the waist, teeth digging into her body with a snap. He hauled her up into the air, his jaw closing around her as if she were a snack and she made a small sound, her hands taking hold of his snout and jaw, working to force them apart. Her strength was suddenly heightened but the youkai refused to release her, a low rumble loosing itself from his throat and hanging in the air, underlying the blowing winds. 

            "You should have joined my side," she murmured dangerously to him, and with a wrathful shriek she suddenly snapped his jaw open, freeing herself in his mouth. 

            The youkai recoiled in surprise, his head hanging low as he shook his snout brusquely and she came loose, falling from his mouth to crash to the ground roughly. Sesshoumaru backed away a step, eyes burning, and he staggered, his head hanging low.

            "Sesshoumaru-sama!" Rin cried, and she took a step, suddenly running to the youkai lord.

            With a small smile Kagome turned on her as well, whips uncoiling from her hands once more and she swung wordlessly, her heart beating.

            A flash of red moved before her and a moment later another silver-haired figure stood in her way, taking each crack of her whips against his forearms as he lifted them to protect his face. Behind him Rin came a screeching halt, her eyes widening, and she stared up at Inuyasha in silent wonder.

            "That's enough," he growled dangerously to Kagome as she stared wordlessly as well, stunned.

            "What are you-" she whispered hoarsely and she suddenly whirled as Kirara landed roughly, powerful paws scratching into the earth. She stared at the large feline and at the monk as he dismounted, staff swinging.

            _"Hiraikotsu!"_

            Whirling once more she was not in time to defend against the bone boomerang and it caught her dead in the stomach, flinging her backward. She was hurled into the ground and her body slid, throwing up earth as she settled several feet away with a soft moan.

            Inuyasha stared at her then at Sango as the exterminator landed where Kagome had just stood. Staring at the fallen woman Sango lifted her hand and caught the bone boomerang as it returned to her, dragging her a step.

            "Is she…" Inuyasha asked and before she could answer he was already racing forward, sliding to a crouch beside Kagome.

            Behind him, silently, Sesshoumaru began to shift once more, shrinking, his features drawing in and becoming those of a human. Inuyasha glanced over, taking in the burned flesh of his chest, the blood that fell from his lips and he felt his eyes widen as his brother reverted to human form only to fall to one knee wearily.

            "Sesshoumaru-"

            "I will _not_-" his brother growled furiously, and he rose to his feet in one angry gesture albeit unsteadily, "handle your problems for you, Inuyasha!"

            Inuyasha stared at him, swallowing audibly.

            Rin came running to Sesshoumaru's side, reaching up to clasp at his sleeve gingerly and he ignored her, breathing heavily. His eyes trailed down to Kagome as she murmured in unconsciousness and without another word he turned and moved away, his shoulders heavy.

            "You…don't want to kill her?" Inuyasha asked him in disbelief, watching his brother as he walked away from a battle.

            Sesshoumaru didn't bother turning around. "What would be the point? You've done the task quite well by yourself." And without another word he stalked off, Rin casting them a grateful look over her shoulder before tagging along.

            Inuyasha stared off after him silently, his jaw clenching.

            "I'm scared to touch her…" Sango whispered, staring down at Kagome's unconscious figure where they had propped her up beside a tree. She wrapped her arms around her body, glancing toward Inuyasha in the same tree and Miroku off to the side before slowly backing away.

            "She's unconscious," Inuyasha said to her quietly where he sat on a branch and he lifted his eyes to the dark sky.

            _Almost the new moon…_

            "All we really have to do is take the Shikon no Tama from her-" Sango said, craning her neck a bit to search Kagome's exposed throat.

            "I am almost positive that will wake her up," Miroku murmured and the exterminator recoiled, backing away. The monk lifted his head toward Inuyasha. "What are we going to do, Inuyasha? We can't wait until she wakes up-"

            "I don't know what to do," Inuyasha cut him off and he lifted a hand to his head, frowning. "I don't _know-_"

            Kagome twitched in her sleep bringing the three of them and Kirara as well to a stop.

            "It's so dark," she whispered faintly and the group drew closer t her, Inuyasha hopping down from the tree into a crouch beside her.

            Miroku arched a brow warily.

            "I can't see you…why can't I see you?" she asked the silent night and she turned her head along the grass, her hand reaching across the grass. "Why won't you _show_ yourself?"

            Sango turned a questioning glance on them. "Who is she talking to?" she mouthed.

            Miroku motioned to his neck, the flat plane of his chest and Sango followed his gesture before looking back toward Kagome.

            Half hidden under the haori lay the Shikon no Tama on Kagome's chest, glittering darkly. But inside the black orb shimmered a small sparkle of white. Sango stared, and beside her Kirara came forth in his small form, whimpering faintly. Sango looked at him as well and suddenly, eyes widening, she looked at Miroku and Inuyasha.

            "Midoriko-" she gasped.

            And Kagome snapped awake with a cry, rising suddenly on her rear and taking hold of her head in pain.

            "Kagome-" Inuyasha said in a stunted breath.

            "Matte-" Kagome cried shrilly, her head bowing as she latched onto her temples with clawed fingers. "_Matte! Ikanaide!"_

            "Kagome!" Inuyasha shouted and he took hold of her wrists, shaking her.

            With a sudden cry she threw him off, flinging him sideways. And a moment later, with Inuyasha recovering, she was stood up, resembling a marionette whose strings were being pulled. And the voice that came from her was dark, dreadful.

            _"You are on thin ice, Priestess!"_

            With a muffled moan she toppled, falling to her hands and knees, and she began to sob, her head bowing to the ground. "She isn't a _threat!_ She's only-"

            Inuyasha crouched beside her once more with a small sound, taking her face between his clawed hands and he shook her, forcing her to look at him through blurred vision. "Kagome! Listen to me! _Listen to me!"_

            She gazed at him, tears trailing down her face as he came into focus, and she whispered, "Inuyasha-"

            And black power burst from her form, flashing and rupturing and she cried out, sobbing, as the group was scattered before her, as she pitched forward once more to the ground, clutching herself with trembling hands. 

            _"Inuyasha!"_ she shrieked.

            Growling, the hanyou rose once more, his hand automatically going to the Tetsusaiga at his side.

            "They're fighting for her…" Miroku said with a grimace, crouching several feet away.

            Kagome rolled onto her side, embracing herself and shaking, black power leaving her frame in small explosions and bursts. "Ya…mete…" she whispered, and her voice came distorted, guttural and at the same time calmly commanding. Black power streaked over her limbs, causing her to jump and stiffen and she flung her hands out, reaching blindly. _"Karada ga-"_

            _My body…_

            With a scream she was pulled into the air once more, the Shikon no Tama floating out from under the haori and hanging suspended on the chain around her neck. Inuyasha stared at her, his jaw hanging open as rays of pure white light shone through the black cloudiness in the jewel. And then the blackness swarmed to consume the white, the glow equal parts darkness and light.

            "Kagome…" Inuyasha uttered and he threw up his hand as the white light flashed in his direction, into his amber eyes. 

            "The darkness mirrors the light in her soul," Miroku murmured, rising and stabbing his staff into the ground before him. He pulled forth a ward, holding it out before himself and praying for a small moment. Then, in a quick gesture, he flung it forth and watched as it came to a stop directly before Kagome's figure and tore cleanly in half. "And they are both very powerful."

            _"You will release her to me-"_ Kagome cried but the voice that emerged was black and ugly, wrath twisting it. _"Or I will destroy her body! And then you will have no one, Priestess! No one to control the Shikon no Tama!"_

            Inuyasha swallowed, a bead of perspiration trailing down his face as black and white light shone through in rays. The light passed over them, peeking and flashing, gentle in the night.

            _"Shiki," _came another voice, soft but firm, and feminine. _"Should you destroy this body you will have no one near you to control. It would mean your demise as well as mine-"_

            _"But who will it end worse for, Midoriko? For me? Will the world really go on as if I had never stepped in? You know better than I that for the Shikon no Tama to fall into the hands of one not capable of controlling it, it could very well destroy this world you so treasure to protect…"_ the voice softened into a hiss and for a moment there was nothing but silence, the breeze blowing in the night. Then, faintly, he whispered through Kagome, _"Now give her to me."_

            Inuyasha's eyes widened, his hand lifting automatically. "No, wait-" he cried.

            And after a silent moment that could have only meant a concession, Kagome slumped to her knees, her head falling to her chest, her body pitching face down into the ground.

            Inuyasha stared for a silent moment, his hand still held out. And then, slowly, he approached Kagome warily, his free hand lifting to the Tetsusaiga.

            On the ground, her head turned to the side, Kagome's eyes snapped open, blackness swirling there and Sango barely had a moment to scream, _"Inuyasha-"_

            Sitting up silently Kagome lifted a hand, gesturing, and Inuyasha made a small sound of surprise before he was suddenly lifted and thrown to the ground, slamming into it with a muffled cry.

            Miroku took a step but Kagome merely motioned at him to stop, her other hand lifting to him. "Don't even think it, Miroku-sama. I can kill you with one blow."

            And the monk came to a stop, his jaw clenching.

            To the side Inuyasha slowly rose, his frame trembling and Sango sincerely doubted it shook from fear or weariness. He lifted his head, a growl coming from him as he glared at Kagome and with a furious shout he threw himself forward, coming down before Kagome and taking hold of the haori's collar. "Give her back!" he ordered and he shook her as she turned her attention to him, her face darkening. "Take someone else! Take _me!_ Just leave her-"

            "How sickeningly sweet," she growled and her voice came in that same ugly tone, her face shifting with it and becoming just as terrible. "But aren't you the slightest bit late in offering to take her place when you've been serving her up for me since the beginning?"

            Inuyasha stared at her. And he understood then that this was not her. That this had never been her. His lips parted, his heart breaking, and she merely returned the glare, her face becoming proud.

            "It isn't you…" he whispered mournfully.

            "Oh, it is," she replied as if he had asked her about the weather. "Sometimes it is. And sometimes she retreats and let's me do all the dirty work. Sometimes she helps me. You always make her angry, but not angry enough to want to kill you once and for all…"

            Inuyasha listened to him speak, his face blanching as that voice continued to emerge from Kagome's lips. And he bowed his head, no longer wanting to see it, no longer wanting to hear it. Tears welled up in his eyes but he forced them away, eyes clenching shut. "Enough. Enough!" he shouted and he shook Kagome for a moment, his face turned away. "Just…give her back to me…"

            "Why?" Kagome asked him, leaning into him to whisper in his ear. "So that you can ignore her as before? Hurt her?" And his voice darkened, almost seductive, "Take her against her will like that beautiful day you found her with Kouga-"

            And with a wrathful shout Inuyasha slammed her to the floor, causing a grimace to cross her face before she suddenly burst into laughter, musical peals of masculine laughter. Inuyasha lifted her and rammed her into the ground once more and she laughed harder, her hands lifting to clutch his wrists as he lifted her yet again.

            "Inuyasha!" Miroku shouted at him.

            "Give her-" Inuyasha whispered menacingly.

            "Why?" she cut him off, her laughter breaking off as well. "Why?" she demanded again. "So that it can go back to the way it was before? She doesn't want that. I don't want that. And it will never be that way again. You have my word on that. Things…will _never_…be the same again."

            And suddenly her form became intangible, Inuyasha's clawed hands phasing clear through her. He hunched, off balance, and she smiled up at him as she vanished into the floor and into darkness. 

            And all that was left was the same continual masculine laughter, hovering in the blackness of night.

Ok everyone! For starters, Seishi means Life and Death. Erm, secondly this story only has like maybe two chapters left, three at most, I think… and I started off an actual Cowboy Bebop fic called Ain't Afraid to Die, so if you're into Bebop (and Dir en Grey, since the title of the fic is from their song) check it out, you might like it! =) Thank you to everyone for reviewing:

Quickening: Hey babe! Did ya catch up? And don't worry, there's still angst to come, LOL!

Iseult: Hey hey! I am more of an anime fan, I've never actually checked out the manga. So yeah, I'm not very sure what abilities Sesshoumaru-sama has from the manga but I use the anime as my reference. And yeah, I still have to bring in Kagura, Kanna and Naraku. That will be in the very end which…I believe is the next chapter or two since Kagome needs Kohaku's shard to complete the Shikon no Tama. =)

Shadiyaray: You're almost in tears from the first chapter?? Oh, girl, don't read the rest then, LMAO!

Leena: Did you get it right, the woman in Kagome's head? =)

Peachy-Girl Momo-chan: I take it from the name you are a Wedding Peach otaku?? Don't worry, we're almost at the end!

Hope and Harmony: Babe, calm down!! It will be a happy ending, I swear it! Well, a happy ending for the bad guys but it's still a happy…ending… ***ducks the flying shoe*** Itai!

KayJuli: The wait's almost over. Are you a Cowboy Bebop fan..?

Va13361: LMAO! I'm so slow updating, I'm really sorry but then when it's over you won't have to wait anymore! Did that cheer you up..?

Nhyemia: Believe me when I say it will work out in the end, I swear it to you and to everyone else!

Kinoko: I would never intentionally leave you, or anyone, hanging. I just have to gear myself up to be in the mood to write a chapter because I don't like churning them out without some kind of emotion. But it's almost over! I swear!

Sinisterly Speaking: Hey, you reviewed Waltz For Mars so thanks very much! I'm happy you like both Inuyasha and Cowboy Bebop! I'm trying to slowly get a handle on the characters of CB, try not to go OOC with them but I have a feeling the new fic I'm putting up will be just as angsty as this one but in a different way entirely. 

Saro: I've seen your name on someone's fave list but I can't remember whose…gomen ne. But thanks for reviewing and hope you keep reading!

Ok now off I go! Goodnight!

-Cassie


	20. Saigo no Yoake

_Saigo no Yoake:_

            Inuyasha watched the sunrise, his back against the tree trunk where he sat several feet off the ground on a sturdy branch. The new moon. Her appearance was tonight. Which meant he would have to hide himself tonight, from the world, from Kagome. It was just one night anyway. Tomorrow, when he was back at full strength, he would resume his search for her. 

            Below him lay Miroku and Sango, curled up next to each other as they slept. Miroku was one to usually sleep sitting up, his staff clasped protectively, but over the passed few weeks he had been sore, healing his wounds slowly. Sang had clucked over him like a mother hen, angrily bashing him off the head when he made the wrong retort, which seemed to be often. Even now, as Inuyasha watched, Miroku's twitching hand suddenly moved, creeping toward Sango's rear which she mistakenly had facing him. He shook his head, already hearing the resounding slap and, sure enough, Sango awoke with a startled cry, whirling to face Miroku who pretended to sleep still.

            _"Hey!"_

            Miroku snapped awake, blinking, and he caught himself with a handful of Sango's rear. "Oh…my, how did that-"

            Sango shrieked and smacked him a good one before he could even finish his sentence. "You perverted _monk!"_ she shouted at him as he instantly blocked another incoming blow.

            "Is it my fault that you plague my dreams as well?" he demanded, a handprint reddening on his cheek. "I can't very well control myself while I sleep-"

            "Don't even think of using _that_ as an excuse!"

            "Well, I'm sure if the two of you didn't wake up every living creature in a hundred mile radius then that slap did," Inuyasha called down to them.

            Miroku smiled and waved cheerfully with his handprint still visible.

            Sango glared at the monk before quickly composing herself with a small, "Ohayo."

            Inuyasha hopped down easily, readjusting Tetsusaiga at his side. Waiting rather impatiently, he looked about as Miroku and Sango began their daily ritual of waking up and getting ready. Kirara slept still and Sango lifted the feline into her arms as they set off to leave.

            "So what is the plan today?" Miroku asked as they walked.

            "The plan is for me to hide myself," Inuyasha murmured and he motioned to the sky.

            Miroku looked up and Sango elbowed him. "The new moon," she explained as they walked. And her expression became the slightest bit worried. Miroku stared at her for a moment, lips parting and then, silently, he bowed his head, walking on.

            They spent the day that way, trudging in silence, with Inuyasha leading. He had no definite course in mind, no scent to lead him, nor had they stumbled across a place to stay the night for him to undergo his human transformation. The way the day was going, they would spend the night out in the wild and because he would lose his sense of heightened smell he would not be able to track down Kagome if she happened to let herself be sensed.

            _There's a shard left. A single one. And Kohaku has it, embedded in his back. She'll go for him, very soon, and I won't be able to stop her from reuniting the Shikon no Tama. I won't be able to-_

            And it was then that he caught the scent in the air, hanging in the forest. And he couldn't believe it. He stiffened, coming to an immediate halt, and Sango ran into him from behind. "Nani-"

            Inuyasha sniffed once and then again, looking about, and he felt his heart freeze in place as he understood the scent, understood what it signified. "I smell…Naraku."

            Sango's jaw dropped open, Miroku instantly frowning. "You smell-"

            "Naraku," Inuyasha nodded and he looked at them both.

            "Which means," Miroku trailed slowly, "He's going through his own period now."

            "Which means Kagome can sense him too if she couldn't before," Inuyasha added.

            "Which means Naraku can't protect Kohaku from her if she goes to take the last Shikon no kakera…" Sango whispered in a shaky tone. And she had paled, her hand automatically going for the bone boomerang at her back.

            "We can't fight today," Miroku said and he sounded urgent, looking from the exterminator to the hanyou. "We can't," he said again. "If Inuyasha is human tonight, my wards won't hold up against her, and your bone boomerang is torn apart again we'll be easy to pick off. We _can't_ do this tonight-" And as Sango stared at him he broke off, his lips parted.

            Inuyasha knew what she was thinking already. If it was a choice between Kohaku and herself, she'd choose Kohaku's life, any day. She was ready to run in there blindly, throwing the bone boomerang, and she'd get herself killed in a moment against the power that was Kagome. She looked from Inuyasha to Miroku and she gave them a shaky smile, even though it was so obviously feigned that it saddened Inuyasha. "This was my battle in the beginning anyway," she whispered, her eyes sliding shut above her smile, her hand clutching the bone boomerang a bit too tightly. "Kohaku is my responsibility, I never wanted this to fall on the both of you as well."

            Miroku stared at her, frowning. "What are you-"

            "We're with you," Inuyasha cut them both off, his jaw firm. "We go in together or we don't go at all. And the fact of the matter is that there's a life at stake, not to mention hundreds upon thousands. If it happens to fall tonight, then we fight tonight. In whatever form, however prepared. But if we're going to do this, we should do this earlier rather than later. Tonight there will be no stopping my own transformation so I'd prefer to do this before it gets that late."

            Miroku stood silently but after a moment he smiled faintly and bowed his head. "Why does it feel like we won't survive this?" he questioned quietly and beside him Sango had tears in her eyes, Kirara purring in her embrace.

            "Because you always were a pessimist, stupid monk," Inuyasha growled and he sniffed once more, lifting his head to the sky.

            "Yes, I'm sure that was the reason…"

            Catching the scent once more, Inuyasha quietly began to lead, feeling the Tetsusaiga at his side. And even the weapon did nothing to comfort him.

            Kagome opened her eyes, gazing up through the trees at the sunlight filtering through. And upon the breeze she caught the scent. The scent of the one she needed to find. The last Shikon no kakera. She rose slowly to a sitting position.

            _You sense it, do you not?_

            "I do," she murmured and she stood up, the haori floating around her frame. "Today will be a good day?" she questioned the voice as she began to move out under the brilliant sun.

            _Today will be the best day._

            Inuyasha paused, his hand lifting as he sensed it. The barrier. Naraku always barred himself in and this time it would be of no help to him. And from outside the barrier he could already sense Kagome's scent as well. Already inside. All ready for battle. "She's inside…" he murmured.

            Taking hold of the Tetsusaiga, he unsheathed the blade, feeling the coursing power that transformed it into the fang. And then, as he inhaled deeply into himself, the blade became burning red, crimson.  Behind him Sango and Miroku backed away, Kirara dropping to the ground and growing to his lengthy size.

            Afternoon, almost evening.

            With a growl Inuyasha tore into the barrier, bringing it into plain view as the blade ripped it open. Electricity crackled loudly, the barrier charged with energy and Inuyasha applied more strength, forcing his way in. And with one powerful swipe of the blade the barrier disintegrated, breaking apart and vanishing into the air.

            "If the barrier was still up, how did Kagome get in?" Sango asked quietly.

            Miroku was not happy. "I have a feeling that Kagome easily bypassed it as if it had not even been there. I would also be inclined to believe that Naraku does not know she's even inside. Especially if he's going through his own transformation."

            If that wasn't the scariest thing, Inuyasha reflected. With his hand clenched around the hilt of the Tetsusaiga he led on, sniffing his way.

            And it was not long before he came across the small castle that Naraku had reinvented for himself. He looked about, sensing evil, sensing magic everywhere, but the owners of that evil were nowhere to be seen. Winds were circulating though, angry winds, and he looked in the direction the winds came from, gazing off into the distance.

            "Anyone else think Kagura is having a bit too much fun with the wind?" Inuyasha murmured and he turned in the direction of the assaulting winds, forcing his way as the winds strengthened.

            "Have they started fighting already?" Sango asked, her face paling.

            Inuyasha did not reply, winding around several small buildings, his feet kicking up dirt, and the wind tossed the dirt around as they trudged on. He was having a bad feeling about all of this, and he wondered again if he would be dead before the new moon even claimed his demon half. Behind him Kirara growled faintly and he understood. Nothing good would come of this.

            Climbing up a hill the winds were suddenly at a peak and the group hesitated at the top, overlooking a large expanse of dead dirt and grass. Inuyasha knew then, as he gazed down upon Kagome where she floated lazily in the air, the haori billowing around her frame. He knew as his eyes shifted over to Naraku, clothed in his furs, his limbs nothing but reaching, coiling, tendrils of flesh, his eyes angry. And he knew just from the vanishing afternoon. 

The battle would be held here. And it would be a long one.

Saigo no Yoake means Last Dawn.

Short, short chapter, I know but believe me, the next one is going to be long and full of so much crap it's not even funny. I'm stressing it right now, going over lots of small details and making corrections and I never knew writing a fanfic could be so exhausting! Geez!

Anyways, for the following ppl, for reviewing:

Nozomi: LOL, you're about to see how it ends. Maybe you'll wish you had waited when it does end…

Pink Straw: If Inuyasha says he loves her what would be the point of my fic? Besides, he's shown quite a few times that he does love her but she is blinded to those moments.

Vold: I can't tell you what happens, you have to reeeead! And by then you'll be like, "Yo, WTF???" LMAO!

Iseult: *Throws herself into Iseult's lap and allows herself to be comforted*  Are you going to hate me after this is all over..? Because the new moon is a BIG deal with the last chapter…and I _wouldn't_ kill off my main character..? I guess you've never read my original fiction, huh?? LMAO. Killing off my main characters is what I'm known for to all my friends…

Raijin-san: LOL, they're into that whole S&M stuff, Fluffy and Kagome. Makes me wonder what else they're into…*pauses worriedly*

Saro: I felt almost threatened by your review, ROTF! I have to throw you off somehow and I think the ending just might but it won't be confusing. It'll just be kinda…messed up… =(

Kainu1329: Nooooo! Inuyasha must never says he loves Kagome. Except maybe at the end but if that's what saves them both that would be ultimately very corny…

Angel7669: Oh, kewl! Thanks for the plug, LMAO! And you have to read chaps 17-19! Don't skip and read the end, it isn't _right!!!_

KayJuli: Ooooh-hoho! The Empty House! That was during my CCS obsession. Man, I love my obsessions. They make me write really interesting things…And come on! I am not going to have the words I Love You fix everything! They never fixed anything in my life, god dang it! But I'm shocked at how many people want it to be like that. Now I'm going to have to think about ending it that way… awww….

Tonz82: OMG, only chapter Four?? You have so much too go and it gets DEEP, be prepared!

Cataluna: *accepts the huge cookie* Can I have milk too..? *Dodges the flying kick* No..? Well don't worry, once it all ends I can actually focus on single fics. Right now I'm seriously killing myself trying to finish this one and really get into Ain't Afraid to Die. You reviewed that one too, thanks so much! I'm so freaking happy you are into CB too!! I have people sharing my obsessions!!! LMAO!

Jenna: I live to update, it's all I can do! And I'll try not to keep the next chapter for long because it's the one to end all!!

Momo-chan: Ah, gomen ne! I used to watch Wedding Peach and it was so girly it made me contemplate a sex change. But I got into it (very sad, Bad Cassie, BAD!) and the main character is called Momo-chan and all that so I just kinda guessed. =)

SylverAngel: Hee-hee-hee…I always saw Kagome as too pure and innocent and for once I really wanted to see her evil. I can't stand a lot of girly good heroines because they're **so** girly. I think it's why I got into Cowboy Bebop because the main girl there is this sluttish-kind of character but with a good heart. I'm crazy, I know.. but sometimes you just gotta be realistic. And I took Kagome for such a ride, LOL!!

Va13361: Your favorite of favorites?? No WAY!! Oh, man, now I'm feeling pressure. And quite truthfully, I'm kicking my own ass trying to write two fics at once. I tried that before and ended up giving up one of my stories to my sis Aes to finish. And it still isn't done, now that I think about it…but yeah, I'm happy it'll be over soon but I really want this one to go out with a bang. Here's hoping I can do it, LOL!

Hope and Harmony: To quote you: "I'd be throwing more than a shoe." *drops to the floor and rolls, shrieking with laughter* Man, that one had me dying when I read it! Ok, well, I will say one thing. At the end of the next chapter you will want to KILL me. You will want to string me up the way I strung up Kikyo in the fic, and you will want to rip my limbs off and do a dance over a bonfire to call the Rain Gods down on me. But may I just say very quickly that there will be an Epilogue after the next chapter so please at least leave me two arms to type with… =)

Lulu: A God at angst?? Holy crap! Don't say stuff like that, that's **blasphemy!!!** *Looks up as the sky darkens with clouds and thunder crashes in the background*

Ok, thanks y'all and here's hoping the short chapter doesn't detract from the next one!

-Cassie Louuuu =)


	21. Eien

_Eien_:

            Inuyasha bowed his head slowly, his amber eyes meeting Kagome's dark ones. She looked angry, but evil as well. Cold-hearted. The haori fluttered around her frame from where she floated before them all and the Shikon no Tama hovered on a delicate chain before her, wound around her slender neck. She glared at them all, her gaze shifting from Miroku and Sango to Kagura and Naraku before finally coming to rest on Inuyasha.

            _"Inuyasha…she's so angry…"_

            He returned her gaze, his heart cold. Yes, she was angry. Very angry. And miserable. He rose from his protective crouch and his gaze slipped passed her figure to the darkening sky above.

            No moon.

            "Are we all accounted for then?" Kagome asked, her skin pale, her eyes dark. She resembled Kikyo all the more with the expression on her face. Even with the way she held herself, the resemblance was uncanny.

            Naraku's eyes had narrowed upon Inuyasha's arrival and he looked from the hanyou to Kagome. "How dare you approach me? How dare you come when you have not been called," he said to her in a coldly wrathful tone. He stood tall upon his demon body, the head of his furs tossed back and his hair fluttered across his face as he stared up at Kagome. Behind him, hesitant, Kagura stood emotionless, playing with a small feather.

            Kagome tilted her head in what seemed to be confusion. "I did not know I needed _permission_…" she murmured, her own eyes becoming slits as well. "But then, am I not doing you a favor by coming to you with the Shikon no Tama? Is this not what you wanted?" And she paused as the demon glared at her. "No. That isn't what you wanted. Poor, lost Onigumo. You wanted not the jewel but…Kikyo. Me," she whispered quietly and her form pulsed with power, black energy floating about her frame. "After all this time you still wanted me…"

            Naraku smiled faintly, his eyes hooded. "Do not flatter yourself, Priestess. I am Onigumo no longer. Onigumo gave himself to the youkai and he was lost. I am Naraku, now and always."

            Inuyasha looked toward Naraku and then slowly to his group. Miroku was looking worse than usual, Sango hesitating stiffly beside the monk. He faced forward once more, looking towards Kagome as she smirked faintly. 

            "Are you really? You have so many names, so many faces…" Kagome said, looking down her nose at him, her head held high. "Onigumo. Naraku. Musou. Such a powerful youkai you fancy yourself to be but in the end what are you really but a mixed bag of _nothing?_"

            Naraku's eyes narrowed into slits.

            Kagome smiled faintly. "Nothing," she repeated in the softest whisper and she slowly lifted a hand, pointing at the half-demon. "But you have something that belongs to me…"

            Naraku did not look the least bit intimidated, a small smile also forming on his face. "Do I?" he purred at her. "I haven't the vaguest idea what you seek, priestess, but I assure you that whatever it is you want will not be yours to take."

            Kagome's smile faltered a bit as she stared at him. "I hardly think you are in any position to tell me what I can and can not take," she said dangerously. "Now, before I destroy everything in a twenty mile radius, it would be wise of you to hand over what is rightfully mine."

            Sango looked ready to dive forward in fear, her form trembling.

            "Rightfully yours," Naraku murmured. "You mean…the boy with the shard in his back…" And he paused thoughtfully.

            Sango took a step, her eyes wide. "Naraku, no-" she cried, holding out a hand frantically. "I beg of you, don't-"

            Naraku looked over and he had amusement on his face as his gaze fell on the exterminator. Kagome looked over as well, an eyebrow arching. Sango looked from Naraku to Kagome and fell silent, her face pale.

            The half-demon raised his head once more toward Kagome, his smile widening. "I think…you are a fool for coming here, Priestess. Although it makes my heart tremble to see you looking as beautiful as ever. You resemble your predecessor more and more with every encounter…" he tilted his head a bit, his dark hair floating. "How is Kikyo, by the way?"

            Kagome's eyes narrowed, her form glowing with a darker light.

            Naraku's smile was impish. "Of course she is dead. I could not have expected less of you. However, perhaps you expected too little of me?"

            Kagome did not reply, hovering like a dark fairy surrounded by waves of pulsing power. And beneath her but almost lost in the shadows of the darkening night was a small girl, frail looking and silent. She stood silently, her face expressionless. And she rotated the mirror she held in her small hands, her long white hair floating lazily.

            "Perhaps my expectations were correct," Kagome said through clenched teeth and as the small girl's mirror began to glow Kagome flung a hand out behind her and swept it forward roughly, her eyes trained on Naraku in a deadly glare.

            The child made a small sound as she was suddenly lifted and flung forward, flying through the air. Inuyasha lifted a hand, lips parting, but the girl was thrown at Naraku's feet roughly, her hands losing their grip on the mirror. Kagome looked down toward the girl, her jaw clenched, and the small child rose silently, looking toward her broken mirror as it leaked small clouds of mist.

            "How pathetic of you, Naraku," Kagome murmured, looking down at the small girl. She cocked her head at the child and asked quietly, "What is your name?"

            The girl looked up at Kagome, her face innocent, her white hair blowing gently about her face. "Kanna," she answered in the softest of voices.

            Kagome gazed at her, her eyes shifting about the girl's features. "Kanna," she echoed quietly. "You are very beautiful, Kanna," she said quietly.

            The girl did not reply to her comment.

            "Very beautiful," Kagome said again and she suddenly lifted her hand, swiping it roughly through the air before her. 

            From the ground, the broken pieces of her mirror shifted and a moment later they were lifted into the air and flung at the girl.

            Sango shrieked, Inuyasha's jaw dropping open, as the slivers sliced through the small child cleanly, tearing flesh and splattering bright red blood. The girl stood silently for a moment, the crimson fluid trailing down her limbs and her face and Kagome whispered softly, "Beautiful…but worthless."

            Wordlessly, without so much as a sound, Kanna slipped to her knees, her expression one of sadness, before slumping to the ground in a heap.

            Behind the child's corpse Naraku sighed impatiently from where he floated.

            "Kagome-" Inuyasha uttered in disbelief, his eyes staring at the child's body. He lifted his gaze as the woman turned to look at him wearily and he couldn't find the words to say to her. He couldn't make sentences form, his entire body stiff and stunned.

            Behind him Sango lifted a hand to her mouth, her face crumbling as tears rose in her eyes.

            "Are you going to tell me I'm wrong?" Kagome asked Inuyasha, sounding as if she didn't want to hear it. "Are you going to tell me that I shouldn't have killed her? Even though she would have stolen my soul from me?"

            Inuyasha stared at her, unable to look away from her evil beauty.

            "She would have taken all the souls I have inside me and she would have had the Shikon no Tama under her command," Kagome whispered to him, her hair floating about her face. "Imagine the power she would have had then, with the souls of Kikyo, Midoriko and Shiki himself, and tell me that I was wrong in killing her-"

            "You were wrong!" Sango cried, tears trailing down her face. And she pointed at Kagome, her hand trembling. "You were wrong to take the life of a child, _any_ child! Having the power does not allow you to make the _decision!"_

            "Sango-" Miroku murmured warily.

            "You've doomed us all!" Sango continued on, shrieking. "Having you in control of the Shikon no Tama is hardly any better than having Naraku take control of it-"

            Kagome's face darkened as the exterminator screamed.

            "And I will stop you here! Before this night is over you will no longer have control of the Shikon no Tama! I will see to that!"

            And without another word she took a step and swung her bone boomerang. _"Hiraikotsu!"_

            Kagome floated backwards a bit as the bone boomerang was released and lifting her hand, she gestured quickly. The weapon slowed in mid-arc, abruptly changing direction and Naraku shifted sideways as it suddenly arced in his direction. Even as he was moving to avoid the boomerang Kagome was darting still, and she swooped low, touching down to the ground before flying in Sango's direction.

            The exterminator recoiled in confusion and Inuyasha understood why. Kagome moved uncannily fast, her figure a blur. He shoved Sango sideways, throwing himself in the way and Kagome seized him by the neck instead, the entire force behind her attack lifting Inuyasha off his feet and tossing him to the ground roughly. She followed through, her hand latched around his neck and her figure landed on his, straddling him, as he choked for a moment. "And yet, here we find ourselves in the same position," she purred, and her other hand met her first, increasing the pressure on his throat. "Funny how you didn't mind this position before-"

            "Inuyasha-" Miroku managed to say and he appeared behind Kagome, lifting his staff over her head and shoving it between her chin and her collar. 

            Kagome grimaced, caught off guard, and she staggered backward onto Inuyasha's legs as Miroku attempted to drag her off the hanyou. He bared his teeth, yanking even more and Kagome made a small sound, her figure straining as she struggled.

            Inuyasha bucked his hips upward and Kagome went falling backwards, Miroku also taken off guard but a moment later he had her shoved to the ground and he kneeled above her head, shoving his staff down onto her neck, his shoulders shaking. Barely wasting a moment Inuyasha drew forth the Tetsusaiga.

            And still it did not transform.

            Kagome laughed raspily, managing to snicker even through the staff pressing down on her throat. "You…never learn-" she uttered to the hanyou and she lifted her gaze to Miroku crouched beside her head. Taking hold of his staff, her jaw clenching, she kicked upward, catching Inuyasha in the face and flinging him backward. The same foot was shoved under Miroku's chin and she pushed upward, tossing him back and off her as well.

            Inuyasha dove to his feet almost at the same time she did and his eyes widened as she swung the staff expertly, advancing on Miroku's form. "Kagome-"

            With a simple breath Kagome lifted the staff, the small bands clinking together, and she stabbed downward, driving the staff into Miroku's chest.

            _"Hoshi-sama!"_

            Blood flew. It was all Inuyasha understood. He came to a dead stop, his figure stiff and straining and Miroku managed a small hiss of pain, his frame trembling. Kagome maintained an angry grip and with a growl she shoved the staff further, punching through Miroku's chest and into the dirt ground.

            _Oh my God…_

            With a cry Sango dove forth, pulling out her blade and Kagome lifted her head quickly, her grip on the staff weakening momentarily. With a bitter shout Sango rammed the blade deep into Kagome's side, her shoulder pressed to hers and Kagome faltered, a cry breaking from her lips, her eyes widening.

            Over Kagome's shoulder Sango bowed her head, tears falling down her face. "Forgive me, Kagome-chan," she whispered and she rammed the blade deeper, causing Kagome to convulse. A deep drop of blood trailed from Kagome's mouth and she grimaced, her eyes squeezing shut as Sango hesitated before moving to rip the blade from Kagome's figure.

            Kagome's hand moved, blocking the attempt as she took hold of the hilt as well and Sango lifted a stunned face to her, her own eyes widening. Her hands passing over Sango's, Kagome managed a firm grip and she forced the blade out slowly, Sango's hands trapped under hers. "Sango-chan," she murmured as she winced, as she pulled the blade out gingerly, "there is nothing to forgive…"

            And she yanked the blade out, shifting the hilt to one hand, her free hand taking hold of Sango right beneath the chin.

            The exterminator gasped, her figure flailing momentarily, and her hands released the hilt of the blade as Kagome ripped it from her, wielding it with one hand. Coldly, Kagome lifted the blade over her head, hoisting Sango off the floor roughly, and she drove the blade into the exterminator's shoulder, stabbing clean through. Sango's cry cut the air, her face straining against the pure pain that swept through her body.

            Inuyasha dropped the Tetsusaiga silently, ignoring the blade as it clattered.

            _This is it, then. This is where it all ends after all…_

            Kagome slowly pulled the blade from Sango's shoulder, sliding it out of the exterminator almost lazily and Sango whimpered, still suspended off the ground by Kagome's hand wrapped around her neck.

            Below, Naraku merely watched, floating upon his demon coils, and a small smile curled his lips, his hair blowing gently.

            Fire streaked across the ground suddenly, from Inuyasha's right and Kagome whirled quickly, instantly dropping Sango and the sword, and recoiling as the fire swept passed the two women, forking just passed Miroku's fallen form.

            Sango toppled to her knees, clutching her shoulder and she whispered, "Kirara-"

            The feline came suddenly from the direction the fire had originated from and the beast roared furiously, jaws open. The creature dove and landed upon Kagome's slight frame, ripping and slashing with sharp claws and Kagome cried out as gashes opened on her face and her arms. The haori protected much of the onslaught but the large feline crushed her to the ground under his enormous weight, and his jaws opened once more, clamping down on Kagome's throat.

            Inuyasha looked toward Miroku slowly, his lips parting, and the monk lay silently, his figure soaked in blood, his limbs limp, and the staff standing upright where it pierced his chest still. To the side Sango hunched over, straining, before also slumping to the ground, blood trailing from her wound.

            And below them, at the foot of the hill, Naraku smiled still.

            Kirara growled angrily as Kagome took hold of the thick fur of his neck and black power burst from her palm, burning at the fur as she maintained her grip on the feline. Kirara's growls became hisses, his large eyes sliding shut, the horrid smell of burned hair rising from the contact.

            Inuyasha took a step forward numbly, his heart cold.

            _No…_

            With a furious shout Kagome flung Kirara aside, glaring as the feline crashed into the ground and slid, slumping wearily.

            _No…_

            Kagome turned to Sango once more, staring down at the exterminator silently. And with a limp to her step, she moved toward her, already reaching with one blood-stained hand.

            _No!_

            Kagome hesitated, as if she had heard the cry herself and slowly, so very slowly, she turned in mid-step, her eyes widening. 

            And behind her stood Inuyasha, his eyes large and crimson stained, his hands curled into claws. 

            Kagome stared at him, her face paling and behind her, at the base of the hill, Naraku tilted his head in what could almost pass as surprise. 

            Wordlessly, but with an animalistic growl, Inuyasha dove forward, his clawed fingers raking across Kagome's face and they both toppled to the ground, the demon landing on top of the priestess and forcing her to take the brunt of the fall. Kagome cried out in surprise and she flailed, eyes immediately falling closed as Inuyasha tore at every visible piece of skin. His clawed hands took hold of the haori as well, yanking it off her shoulders and Kagome shrieked, fighting to keep her torso covered by the firerat skin but Inuyasha furiously yanked at it, piercing her skin with his sharp claws and digging them in. 

            Sango shifted a bit, her eyes opening into slits and she stared, paling, as Inuyasha tore Kagome's skin in chunks, ripping and slicing, blood splattering his white top. 

            _"Inuyasha!"_ Sango screamed, and the demon roared wrathfully at her, seemingly annoyed that she would disturb him. Beneath him Kagome hunched into a ball, hiding her trembling figure, and Inuyasha rose from her, a clawed hand lifting to his lips. Hungrily, he lapped at the blood for a moment and then he reached down and took hold of Kagome's thick dark hair and he yanked on her, dragging her as he began to storm toward the edge of the hill.

            Sango stared at him, fearfully, as he passed by her, dragging Kagome's gasping figure, and she watched the demon as he stopped at the hilltop, looking down at Naraku.

            "Nothing but an animal, aren't you, Inuyasha?" Naraku asked in a soft voice, his tone dark. Kagura's eyes were wide behind him, her lips parted as she stared from Inuyasha to Kagome in disbelief.

            "Inuyasha-" Sango managed to make out, reaching a hand out to him and he barked at her furiously, making her recoil in terror. "Inuyasha!"

            Wordlessly, but growling, Inuyasha lifted Kagome by her hair alone, taking a bunchful of it in his hand and hoisting her up off the ground. She made a small sound, wincing, her skin lashed, and on the smooth bloodied curve of her breast lay the Shikon no Tama, glittering darkly. Inuyasha stared at it, his teeth bared in a feral growl, and he reached up to take hold of it, examining it like a fascinated beast.

            "Careful, Inuyasha," Naraku called up to him and the beast whirled to face him as he spoke. The evil demon smiled up at the hanyou and from behind his back he yanked forth a boy, maintaining a firm grip on the boy's shoulder. "We wouldn't want you to destroy that jewel before its completion…"

            _"Kohaku!"_ Sango shrieked and she pulled herself up on trembling knees, her figure straining to rise. She made it to one knee before falling forward once more, shaking weakly. "No, please, Kohaku!"

            Inuyasha glared down at her, Kagome flailing in his grasp, and as Sango stared up at him she understood. That was not Inuyasha. It was the demon half of him taking over. And she glanced over her shoulder to where Tetsusaiga lay on the ground, rusted and unused.

            To the side, Miroku stirred, bringing Sango's gaze to come flying to his, and he blinked wearily, grimacing as he rolled a bit.

            "Now, Priestess," Naraku called again, smiling coldly. "What was that about underestimating me?"

            Kagome's eyes opened slowly, her face streaked with blood, and she turned her glare down on Naraku, her frame hanging limply from Inuyasha's grip.

            "Would you like me to reunite the Shikon no Tama with its last shard?" Naraku asked politely.

            "Iie!" Sango cried and she suddenly threw herself to her feet, catching herself on Kagome's waist as her knees faltered under her. She slid a bit, bowing her head against Kagome's ribs as she tried to hoist herself back up and Inuyasha roared at her furiously, lashing out at her. The exterminator cried out as his clawed hand raked her across the face but as she fell away she recoiled with the Shikon no Tama clutched in her palm, her body slumping to the floor.

            Naraku made a small angry sound from below as Inuyasha dropped Kagome dismissively, turning on Sango.

            "Sango-" Miroku whispered, and he lifted trembling hands to the staff stabbing into his chest. 

            Inuyasha reached out and took hold of Sango, the exterminator choking as he lifted her into the air and Sango gazed at him, grimacing. "Inuyasha-"

            Kagome lifted her head from where she lay, her frame shaking in weakness.

            "Bring me the jewel!" Naraku ordered and Inuyasha snarled at him over his shoulder, his clawed grip on Sango's neck tightening reflexively. Sango winced, her hands lifting to pry at Inuyasha's fingers, and she clutched the Shikon no Tama still in a tight grip.

            With a small sound of fury, Naraku lifted his other hand and tore into Kohaku's back.

            _"Kohaku!"_ the exterminator flailed, kicking outward and her foot caught Inuyasha in the waist but did little to affect him.

            From below Naraku held up the last shard, its brilliant pink light bursting out in rays and beams in the night and he released the boy, merely watching as he crumpled to the floor soundlessly.

            Sango shrieked, tears trailing down her face. _"Kohaku! Iie!"_

            Kagome rose slowly, staggering on weak knees as she straightened.

            Reaching down from Inuyasha's fingers, Sango lifted something from her side and placed it over her nose and mouth wearily, her eyes closing. And her other hand, clutching the Shikon no Tama, carefully pulled out something else, also from her waist, and with one quick gesture she threw the object to the ground.

            Smoke instantly rose around herself and Inuyasha, the hanyou recoiling at its sudden appearance before he began to cough, growling. Flailing in his grip, Sango managed a small cry of surprise as he abruptly dropped her, staggering away from her, inhaling raspily.

            A single ward cut through the smoke, streaking and flattening against Inuyasha's back, and the hanyou howled as streaking forks of electricity burst from the paper, seizing the half demon and staggering him. Inuyasha fought for a moment, red eyes narrowed in fury, his clawed hands tightening into fists and then, with a whimper he fell to the ground.

            Sango rose into a crouch stiffly, pain flitting across her face and Miroku sat on the opposite side of the smoke, his figure barely visible through the mist dragging across the ground.

            "Kagura," Naraku ordered simply.

            The woman stepped around him and she lifted a hand up, her angry eyes fixed on Sango. Winds rose up around the exterminator and Sango blocked her face as the winds pushed aside her poison gas, clearing the space almost immediately.

            "Sango-" Miroku's voice cut across the expanse between them and she looked toward him in time to see Kagome rise up before her, the sword in her hand once more. With a cry Kagome stabbed downward, one furious strike, and the blade slid in cleanly, through Sango's chest.

            The exterminator stared for a moment, her eyes wide, and above her Kagome's evil was overwhelming. Her hand dropped away from her face, the mask falling soundlessly.

            "You have something that belongs to me," Kagome whispered.

            Sango made a small sound, even as Miroku shouted for her once more, and wordlessly she fell forward onto her knees, her figure straining around the blade stabbing through her torso. Kagome backed away a step, her jaw clenched, and the exterminator could only gaze at her, tears rising in her eyes.

            "Kagome-chan…"

            Kagome merely returned her gaze, her face pale and yet dark in the night. "Kagome-chan died a long time ago…" she whispered. And she reached down to Sango's hand, prying the tight fingers open and reclaiming the Shikon no Tama. Sango murmured a small protest but Kagome merely released the sword, leaving it embedded in the exterminator's chest, and she turned on her heel, floating back toward the edge of the hill.

            _"Sango-"_ Miroku's voice was tight with fear and she hunched forward over the sword, her figure trembling. He staggered toward her and fell to his knees before her, his bloodied staff in his hand once more and she looked up at him, tears in her eyes. 

            "I wanted to save him…" she whispered. And she fell forward into his arms, her form weak.

            The monk lowered his staff to the ground, holding her to his chest and she looked at him once more, aware of Inuyasha several feet away, unconscious, and Kagome at the edge of the hill, merely staring at them.

            "We should never have come…" Sango murmured to him, and her hand lifted to his chest, to his wound and the bloodied cloth surrounding it. 

            "We had to come," he shushed her and he pressed his palm to her face, embracing her gently. "There was no alternative."

            "There was," she disagreed and she felt the blood that trailed from the corner of her mouth. Her tears fell as well, running down into his hand. "I could have given it all up, become a normal woman. I could have married a lord and forgotten it all…"

            Miroku smiled at her gently. "Why didn't you, then?" he asked her.

            "You weren't the lord," she whispered and she gazed at him for a long moment, merely staring at him as if committing his features to memory. Then, slowly, she smiled at him and she closed her eyes.

            Miroku didn't say anything as he held her. He listened to her breathe, listened as her breath grew faint and he leaned forward to press his lips to hers softly, his fingers brushing away her hair from catching on the drop of blood that stained her chin. And he tasted that blood, tasted her skin and already found it growing cold. 

            "Would a monk have been enough?" he asked her faintly. And he lifted her limp frame against his, embracing her tightly, his vision blurring as he looked up into the night sky. 

            Behind him, Naraku called to Kagome darkly. "What will you give me for this shard, Priestess?" he asked her, and he held up the last Shikon no kakera.

            "Your head on a platter," she answered. And she clutched the Shikon no Tama in her hand, black winds rising around her.

            Kagura turned her attention to Kagome, studying the black winds as they swirled about the Priestess' frame. Lifting her hand, her own winds blew toward Kagome, clashing against the black winds of the Shikon no Tama.

            "Do you really think you can stop me?" Kagome asked her quietly. She lifted the Shikon no Tama above her head and the black winds suddenly became more powerful, rising upwards with the force of hurricanes and Kagura stared in disbelief, her lips parting.

            But from behind them all, a different kind of black wind rose, even more powerful than Kagome's winds. Naraku looked passed Kagome, Kagura hunching a bit to hold herself to the earth. 

            "This will not happen," Miroku growled quietly and he had risen, Sango's form crumpled on the ground behind him. His staff in the air, he had his other hand up as well, his fingers splayed to unveil the Kazaana.

            Kagome's legs slid from under her at the sheer force of the black hole, Naraku's hair blowing about his angered face. Kagura's jaw tightened and she took a step forward, attempting to correct the direction of the winds. Miroku didn't waver. Naraku had created the black hole in his hand and now the demon would have to live with it. Kagome glared through the winds and her eyes widened as the winds increased, as she slid across the pebbled ground against her will.

            To the side, Inuyasha stirred.

            With a cry, the Shikon no Tama was released from Kagome's fingers, flying through the air and she took a step after it, her face paling. "Matte-"

            The jewel shot into the Kazaana's path, halting a moment before the monk's hand and Miroku lowered the Kazaana then, snatching the Shikon no Tama in his free hand. It rested in his palm, the black hole still ripping at the ground powerfully where he pointed it absentmindedly. "All this for a small jewel," he murmured, gazing at it sadly.

            Naraku lifted off the ground, floating upward and as he moved, the tendrils of demon flesh suddenly wrapped together, a brilliant glow issuing forth as he touched down on the hill beside Kagome. Legs formed as did the lower torso and as the light died away he stood dressed in his animal skin, his hair floating down to rest on his shoulders.

            Miroku lifted his glare to the demon, his fingers closing around the Shikon no Tama.

            Wordlessly, Naraku strode passed Kagome, looking ready to destroy anything in his path, and from the ground Inuyasha suddenly leapt up, crashing into the demon and taking him down. Naraku let out a muffled growl, his face darkening, and they toppled to the ground, claws bared, black power raging.

            "Give me the jewel," Kagome said to him softly, gazing at Miroku over the flailing figures that were Naraku and Inuyasha. 

            The monk lifted his eyes to her. "It isn't worth it, Kagome-sama," he murmured faintly, his Kazaana still tearing up dirt and pebbles. "At the expense of a human life, it was never worth it-"

            "You don't understand!" Kagome shrieked and she lunged forward, rounding about Naraku and Inuyasha. "That jewel can right everything wrong in this world! The jewel can make slaves of millions, can bend the world any which way one desires! Give me the _jewel-"_

            Miroku solemnly lifted his Kazaana into the air, his hair blowing.

            Kagome came to a stop, her teeth clenched.

            "If I swallow this jewel, it will be over," the monk said to her over the rushing of the winds. "We can be rid of all this evil. It can all be as it once was!"

            _"No!"_ Kagome shouted and she stared at him angrily. "I won't let it be that way again!"

            And she lunged toward Naraku and Inuyasha, her hands reaching down and digging into Inuyasha's shoulder and tearing into the hanyou's flesh. Inuyasha's growl echoed in the darkening night and he turned on the priestess, tearing at her with his claws but she flung him away, turning to Naraku.

            The demon glared at her, rising onto his rear and Kagome latched onto him, throwing him to the floor once more and standing over him, her hands taking him by the neck and thrusting him back down roughly. A small rumble of a growl reverberated from Naraku and Kagome smiled at him faintly, glaring at him with almost maniacal glee.

            "I'm going to have to kill you now, Naraku," she whispered to him almost apologetically. "The Shikon no Tama can only have one owner and I choose to be that person." And she dug her hands into his chest, black power rising around her as she straddled the demon.

            Naraku's eyes widened as his form began to darken, his figure pulsing with his demon energy. "What are you-"

            "I'm going to devour you," she purred to him, her eyes swimming in sudden darkness, black orbs of obsidian. "I'm going to eat you up, just like the youkai did to you before. And I'm going to wield all the power you have accumulated in the last few years and use it for my own ends." She smiled once more. "I hope you'll forgive me."

            And pure powerful force rose up around them, splitting the ground and sending dust and dirt flying about in small whirlpools. In the center of the chaos were the shadowed figures of Kagome and Naraku, her fingers piercing Naraku's chest and the demon was shouting, _screaming_, his figure stiffening in the darkness.

            Inuyasha sat up on his rear, staring with confused red demonic eyes.

            The winds became stronger, the sound of them deafening somehow, and Miroku brought an arm up to block his face against the madness. Beside him, his Kazaana raged just as powerfully and it was then that Naraku shouted into the dark power, his voice dwindling as blackness burst from the energy that surrounded him and Kagome.

            At Miroku's side, the Kazaana suddenly lessened, the winds reaching from his hand slowing. He looked down quickly, his eyes widening, and as he lifted his hand warily the winds diminished, the skin of his hand slowly closing over and sealing away the Kazaana. Down at the bottom of the hill Kagura suddenly staggered, hunching over, her teeth bared through parted lips as she clutched at herself. "Naraku-" she cried, and she fell to her knees, her figure stiff and straining. Miroku stared in disbelief, his frame taut, and his skin had already healed over as if the black hole had never been there to begin with. He quickly turned his attention back to Kagome just as the whirlpools of darkness burst outward in one last display of power.

            And then all settled and only Kagome remained, kneeling in the dirt, her hands glowing with black energy. Kagura below let out a shriek, her frame breaking apart abruptly into pieces of light and flesh and even as the black energy vanished she was already disappearing as well, fading into nothingness. Miroku backed away a bit, his fingers clutching the Shikon no Tama tightly and Kagome slowly looked up at him, her eyes solid blackness. She smiled faintly and she lifted her hand, producing the final shard.

            "I'm about to get very angry," she said simply. 

            Miroku maintained a defensive stance, lifting the Shikon no Tama to his face. "Kagome-"

            "Do not go begging for your life now," she stated as she rose, her fingers closing around the Shikon no kakera. "It's too little, too late."

            The monk backed away a step, clutching his staff. And he didn't see her when she moved, didn't understand what had happened until she was already before him. Even then, his thoughts were a mad rush of voices, anxious, desperate and fearful.

            _I'm alone in this. She will kill me now. And it would all have been for nothing…_

            She took hold of him by the face, shoving him to the ground roughly and stooping slowly she ripped the staff from his grip, flinging it away.

            "This is almost…anti-climactic," she murmured as she held out her hand.

            Miroku glanced down sharply as his hand began to glow and he felt the Shikon no Tama waver in his grip, felt it come to life. And he looked at her quickly, tightening his grip. He was delaying the inevitable, he knew, his jaw clenching. But one more moment that Kagome didn't have the jewel was another moment that the world was safe yet.

            Behind Kagome Inuyasha rose and Miroku looked at him quickly, seeing the demonic red eyes of his friend and there would be no help there either. Inuyasha growled, sitting on his haunches and studying the pair almost critically and Miroku shouted anyway, desperately, "Inuyasha!"

            Kagome glanced over her shoulder, her attention shifting toward the hanyou and even as she turned to face him the Shikon no Tama suddenly burst through Miroku's hand, cleaving clean through his flesh and floating up lazily into the air. Miroku bit back a cry, clutching his wounded hand to his chest and Kagome smirked at him as the Shikon no Tama came to float into her palm, as she turned back toward Inuyasha. "It's almost like having the Kazaana once more, ne, Miroku-sama?"

            Miroku merely glared at her, wordless.

            Kagome floated toward Inuyasha thoughtfully, gazing at him. He returned her gaze, growling faintly, his hands clawed before him.

            "Like a caged animal," she whispered to him and she reached a hand out to him, recoiling when he erupted into a frenzy of growls and snapping bites. She shook her head at him, soothingly. "I can release you," she said to him. "I can make you the full demon you wish to be-"

            With a snarling bark Inuyasha dove at her, smashing into her, and they tumbled to the ground, a cry breaking from Kagome as he went at her once more, clawed fingers tearing into her flesh and sliding off the haori that protected her. He ripped at the haori, lashing at her skin and she lifted a hand to him to stop him, to cringe against him.

            Miroku stared, heaving for a breath.

            _He can do it, he can kill her. We can still survive this-_

            And in that moment, even as he thought it, Inuyasha suddenly faltered, a high-pitched whimper breaking from him as if he were a puppy who had just been abused. He staggered backward, falling to his knees before Kagome as she achingly sat up and he lifted his clawed hands to his head, shaking.

            "Inuyasha-" Miroku whispered, his eyes widening. "What-"

            And the white of Inuyasha's hair suddenly darkened, his claws shrinking away into fingers, into nails. His whimpers became groans, gasps, and Kagome stared wide-eyed, her lips parted wordlessly.

            Miroku felt iciness shoot up his frame.

            _No. No, no, no. Not now-_

            Inuyasha fell forward to his hands and knees, his hair as dark as the moonless night, and as his eyes came open they also had darkened, the amber gone from his irises. He heaved for a moment, breathing raspily and, slowly, almost fearfully, he lifted his head to look from Miroku to Kagome.

            "Inuyasha-" Miroku said again in defeat.

            And Kagome stared for another moment before lifting her eyes to the night sky. The absence of the moon brought a giggle to her lips, a sudden relief almost, and as she continued to stare at the sky the giggle became malicious laughter, hanging in the air eerily as the monk and the hanyou stared at her.

            "Oh," she murmured in between peals of laughter, "the new moon…"

            Inuyasha gazed at her, only too human and too aware then of everything that lay in ruins around him. His gaze shifted toward Kohaku in a limp heap, Sango lying lifelessly only feet away from himself, Kirara unconscious to the opposite side, and Miroku weakening even as he lay there.

            And then there was Kagome, her skin torn and bleeding under the haori, the crimson fluid splattered across every inch of visible pale skin, her eyes shut merrily, and laughing maniacally. She heaved with her laughter, heaved for a single breath that seemed to elude her and she was darker than he had ever seen her.

            "I'm going to enjoy this now," she said to the hanyou and she was suddenly on her feet, standing before him and taking hold of him by the throat. Inuyasha reflexively choked, grimacing as she hoisted him up before her and behind her Miroku attempted to rise as well, straining. Inuyasha looked at him quickly, even as the monk pulled free a ward and prayed for a moment.

            "Miroku-" Inuyasha gasped, grimacing, "No-"

            Kagome whirled as the ward landed across her forehead and she shrieked as electricity burst from the paper, stumbling backward but maintaining a grip on Inuyasha. The electricity forked, streaking across her entire form and she furiously flung Inuyasha at the monk, lifting both hands to the ward fixed to her forehead.

            Inuyasha crashed to the floor, sliding to a halt before Miroku and the monk came forward a step, falling heavily to his knees beside the hanyou and wordlessly, he bowed his head and became silent.

            Inuyasha looked at him. "Miroku-"

            Kagome shrieked furiously, staggering under the electricity breaking from the ward and, blindly, she lifted a hand and shot forth a blast of black energy, her face twisted in rage. Inuyasha instinctively ducked his head, but the blast ricocheted off a sudden field of power surrounding them and he looked toward Miroku once more, his lips parting.

            "It's up to you now, Inuyasha," Miroku said quietly, not lifting his head from his prayer.

            Inuyasha stared at him, eyes widening. "W-what?" he asked faintly.

            Miroku smiled in his prayer, not flinching in the least as a second burst struck the field encasing them. "It's up to you," he said again, his voice quiet. And he opened his eyes then to look at his friend, his gaze gentle. "I'm not going to last much longer…"

            Inuyasha didn't even want to hear it. "Miroku, don't do this. I _need_ you-"

            The monk's smile widened as if there was nothing wrong with the world. "You don't need anyone but yourself, Inuyasha. To finish this, all you ever needed was yourself." And even as he spoke Inuyasha caught sight of the blood that flowed from his wound. The hanyou's eyes trailed downward fearfully, his breathing becoming rapid once more.

            "Miroku-"

            The monk merely stared at him for another moment, his smile peaceful. And then, wordlessly, he faltered and slipped to his side, his eyes sliding closed.

            _"Miroku!"_

            Kagome came to a stop as the ward suddenly fell from her forehead, as Inuyasha cried out fearfully and bent over the monk frantically. She stared at the paper as it floated to the ground and then she lifted her head to the hanyou, to the fallen monk.

            "Miroku…" Inuyasha murmured, staring with wide eyes blindly.

            Wordlessly, Kagome turned away, clutching the Shikon no kakera in one hand and the Shikon no Tama in the other. And with Inuyasha tending to the monk at her back she lifted the pieces together before her, gazing at them both with dark eyes.

            "Let this be the end," she murmured. And she merely stared as the last shard floated from her palm and rejoined the jewel, black power glowing through the cracks before fusing the entire item into one. She gazed at the orb as light and shadows played across its surface, as darkness overcame the glow of white that shimmered deep inside. And she allowed the jewel itself to float off her hand, to hover before her and send rays of black across the land.

            From behind, the rusted Tetsusaiga suddenly tore through her, breaking out cleanly through her chest and she gasped, her eyes widening at the sudden pain that swarmed up her entire being. A small whimper came from her lips as she lowered her eyes to the battered blade protruding through her chest and before her the Shikon no Tama fell to the ground, bouncing and rolling to a stop only a few feet away.

            "Nani-" she whispered faintly.

            Turning, she encountered Inuyasha, his head bowed, his eyes hidden under his long dark hair, and his shoulders shook with tears, his teeth bared through parted lips. He stood stiffly, trembling, his human hands stained with crimson blood and Kagome merely stared at him for a long moment, teetering on suddenly weak knees.

            "Inuyasha-"

            "I'm sorry," he whispered to her, tears trailing down his face even as his eyes remained hidden under his black bangs. "Kagome, I'm _sorry-"_

            Kagome fell to her knees, heaving, her hands lifting to the blade and he fell to his knees before her as well, suddenly sweeping her roughly into his embrace and holding her fiercely, the tip of the blade sliding against the side of his ribs. She fought him for a moment, whimpering faintly, and Inuyasha took hold of Tetsusaiga's hilt behind her, grasping it tightly.

            The blade suddenly morphed, transforming, and a shriek burst from Kagome as the blade tore her chest open, growing inside her. She choked, clutching Inuyasha's blood-splattered top with tight, trembling fingers, and she whispered painfully, "How-"

            Inuyasha held her nevertheless, trying to comfort her as she convulsed, blood spilling to the ground around her. Mournfully, he uttered, "You stopped being human a long time ago…" and he shook with tears as she did, holding onto her just as she held onto him. 

            Kagome flailed even then though, shuddering, clutching him with a painfully tight grip and she murmured almost absentmindedly, "It can't end this way. It _can't-"_ and she reached behind her blindly, searching for the Shikon no Tama, frantic.

            Inuyasha shushed her, fighting back the sob that threatened to break free. "Let it go," he whispered to her, lifting a hand to the crown of her hair, running his human hands through the soft locks. "Just let it go and it will be ok…"

            _"No!"_ she shrieked, her cry dying away into a moan. "No…it isn't fair. It isn't…_fair-"_

            Inuyasha didn't respond to that because deep inside he agreed. It _wasn't _fair. It wasn't fair that after all the years they had searched for the shards, this was the way it ended. It wasn't fair that even in the end, he would never be with Kikyo's soul, _Kagome's_ soul. And it wasn't fair that once it was all over, he was alone again.

            It wasn't fair.

            But he shushed her again soothingly, his embrace tightening around her as she convulsed again, as blood fell from her mouth silently. And he felt his heart break, tear into pieces, his entire frame heavy as he listened to her struggle for a breath. He had never wanted it this way, had never thought it would be this way.

            Kagome stopped then, merely resting in his embrace, and he didn't want to know if she had passed. But in his ear, she said quietly, "Inuyasha?"

            The hanyou closed his eyes at her warm breath against his ear. "I'm here," he replied.

            She sighed faintly, her own eyes closing. "They're free…"

            And from inside her, darkness and light suddenly burst out in rays of brilliant light. Inuyasha recoiled a bit, looking down at Kagome and her eyes were slowly slipping shut, her face stained with blood. Inuyasha stared in confusion, fear, as the dark and the light separated into two orbs, floating lazily up into the air before suddenly streaking outward to form shapes, human figures.

            He understood then, as he stared in disbelief over Kagome's limp shoulder.

            Midoriko formed, her face drawn and tired but determined and she stared darkly at the second figure as it formed that of the youkai, the revolving heads shifting furiously. And the two sides faced each other, silent for a long moment.

            "Midoriko," Shiki said to her in a silky voice, the heads shifting, Lust snapping into place on the long neck of the youkai. "It has been a long time, has it not?"

            The priestess merely returned his look, and at her side she grasped her blade, still clothed in the armor she had perished in. "Not long enough," she said to him, seeming almost saddened by him.

            Inuyasha looked from one to the other and he stiffened as the youkai looked down at him, glowing faintly in the night. 

            "Did you know I loved her?" Shiki asked Inuyasha quietly and the priestess bowed her head mournfully then, her eyes closing as if the statement itself was too heavy to hear.

            Inuyasha looked at Midoriko in confusion.

            "I loved her more than I loved the life on this miserable planet," Shiki breathed, looking back to Midoriko. His voice became gentle, tender, and if that was the voice that Kagome had always heard in her mind it was no wonder she had allowed him to take over, had allowed herself to be lead by him. The youkai's face was twisted, a sharp contrast to the voice. "I loved her until the end…"

            Midoriko remained silent, her head lowered still.

            "I love her still…" the youkai finished and he stepped away, recoiling slowly. "But she never loved me."

            The priestess lifted her head and, even as a spirit, tears shimmered in her eyes. Her hold on the blade loosened a bit as she gazed at the youkai and she shook her head, her beauty glowing in the night.

            "I loved you, Shiki," she whispered faintly. "I loved you just as dearly. But you chose your path and I was chained to mine. It wasn't the right time for us, wasn't the right life. Even now it isn't right-"

            "And how ironic that our past would be played out in the lives of two who were just like us…" the youkai murmured. He looked toward Inuyasha once more and his head spun into the Misery, "Shiki stands for the four seasons. It was the name I took in the end because it signified how long it took for me to reveal my feelings for her. Four seasons. A year. I loved her for a year without her knowing. And I told her and I knew once I had that I should never have spoken a word of it-"

            Midoriko bowed her head once more, tears trailing down her translucent face.

            "I told her I loved her and she turned me away. She had too many other things to do, too many other things to accomplish and she could never be with me as it was. The mantle of Priestess was one that would be with her always and I was furious with that," Shiki whispered. "I wanted her to _see_ me, just me, and I became a demon for her. If I could just, for once, get her to see me, I could make her understand what it was I felt for her, truly. It was one thing to say it, one thing to _mean_ it, and I wanted her to understand that I meant it. But I never knew becoming a demon would make me this…" and he lifted his hands to the faces sorrowfully.

            Midoriko turned away from him, her blade hanging almost lifelessly at her side. 

            "And she turns from me still," he said to her back, his head bowing. "In the past I followed her around, before and after becoming a demon. And I could see the pain in her eyes when she would look at me. It hurt me to know that I had put that pain there and I wanted to help her, I wanted to soothe her, but she never allowed me. And in the end she went off to battle the youkai and she sacrificed her soul for those people. Those people who condemned me, condemned what I felt for her. She went to save them and I never saw her again and even now…it wasn't fair."

            Midoriko turned her head to look at Inuyasha and Kagome, limp in his embrace. Her face was dark with pain, shadowed, and all she did was gaze at them both wearily.

            "When Kikyo was alive," Midoriko whispered, "she held my soul in her hands, protected it with her life, and I felt her love for you, Inuyasha. And it hurt me, made me weep at times, at the way your love mirrored ours. How fair was it that two people could love one another and be bound by tradition, by rules and orders? How long could one go on loving another before they were inevitably drawn together, casting away everything expected of them? Or in the end, would they break apart from the strain, grow to hate?" she shook her head at him, and Inuyasha felt her pain as surely as he felt his own. "I could never grow to hate the people I was sworn to protect-"

            "And yet it was their fault that you could never love fully," Shiki said behind her.

            "It was my fault as well," she said and she whirled to face him, gazing at him with tears shimmering on her smooth cheeks. "I accepted the path of the Priestess because I loved this world and all who lived in it! I loved it all…and I loved you-" she sighed sorrowfully. "But it was not meant to be."

            Shiki stood before her stiffly, his frame pulled taut.

            "It will never _be,"_ she murmured. "Not for us. No longer. We were dealt a hand that we could not win and it was no one's fault, Shiki. No one's fault but our own for feeling what we did."

            The youkai did not reply to that but the air about him was half mournful, and half angry. 

            "But things can be better between them," and Midoriko motioned to Inuyasha, her hand on the sword tightening. "Once the Shikon no Tama is used, fulfilled, we can be free. She will no longer be a Priestess to a jewel of power. We can be together then-"

            "You don't know that," Shiki cut her off sharply. "You don't know anything about that, Midoriko. I would rather be here, knowing that I can hang onto you always, rather than face an alternate path that could very well separate me from you."

            Midoriko gazed at him. "Don't do this."

            The youkai seemed to grow larger then, his frame darkening with a sinister power. "I will do what I must to ensure I follow you wherever you go," he said to her quietly. And he suddenly began to break apart into clouds of blackness, swarming into the night sky before shooting down to earth once more.

            Inuyasha's jaw dropped open, clutching Kagome's limp frame to his and pushing himself backward.

            Midoriko looked upward, her jaw tightening, and even as tears trailed down her cheeks she lifted the sword purposefully. Waiting silently, she inhaled deeply and as the black mist shot at her she lifted her blade and darted forward, the blade slicing through air and silence.

            A choked cry echoed in the night and the mist pulled together behind her, forming the figure of Shiki and he held himself stiff, straining painfully. Inuyasha stared in wide-eyed confusion and he made a sound as the youkai fell to his knees, clutching his chest in disbelief.

            Midoriko bowed her head once more as the youkai gasped, and she lowered the blade, dropping it a moment later. The weapon fell from her hands but as it floated to the ground it suddenly vanished, fading away into the night as if it had never existed.

            Shiki hunched over, his shoulder heaving and the faces shifted continuously, from one to another and to another still as if he did not know what he felt, what face to wear.

            "You are free now," Midoriko whispered into the air and Inuyasha understood she spoke to the youkai, even as he slumped onto his side, convulsing. The Priestess did not turn to face him as she spoke but her slender shoulders shook, her hair blowing gently as if the constraints of the living world affected her.

            Behind her, the youkai made a small sound, agony flitting across the faces, and then, slowly, his form faded away as gently as Midoriko's sword had. With a faint murmur he vanished and all that was left was Midoriko, weeping quietly, her face lifting to the night sky.

            "Wait for me…" she called out softly, mournfully.

            Inuyasha merely remained clutching Kagome, stunned beyond words. His eyes widened as the Priestess turned to him finally and the tears on her face reminded him of the tears Kagome had cried over the passed years. Even over the most useless things, they pulled at his heart even then. He watched Midoriko as she floated close to him and behind her the Shikon no Tama suddenly moved, the blackness inside swirling away to reveal the brilliant pink glow of the neutral jewel.

            Pausing before him, smiling through her tears, Midoriko lifted her hand and the orb floated upward to rest in her translucent hand. "Make a wish," she said to him quietly, gazing at him almost lovingly. 

            Inuyasha stared at her, at a loss for words, and his eyes shifted to the Shikon no Tama. "It isn't my wish to make…" he said numbly. And Midoriko's smile widened even though she seemed ready to weep eternally.

            Kagome stirred in his embrace, lifting her head to him and then to the Priestess who bent toward them and she said in a strained voice, "It is my wish. My decision."

            Inuyasha looked at her, worry creasing his brow but she looked at him once more, her face streaked with blood and tears.

            "I want you to have control of the Shikon no Tama. I want you to make your wish. Just as Kikyo would have allowed you, so will I," she said to him quietly and she exhaled wearily, her eyes heavy.

            Inuyasha gazed at her, fearful. And as she weakened in his grasp he said immediately, "I wish-"

            And Midoriko placed a finger to his lips, silencing him. "There is no need," she said to him and she looked at Kagome, who seemed to hover between the dream and the reality. "She will be returned to her time and all ties will be severed. You will not see her again, Inuyasha, so do not waste the wish on the well, on the future. In that I can not help you." Her gaze saddened as did his and she lifted her free hand to his hair, smoothing it back and he felt her as if she were real, as if she loved him.

            Inuyasha stared at her. "I don't…understand…" he whispered.

            Midoriko gazed at him, at his confusion and quietly, she said, "Yes, you do."

            Inuyasha's gaze turned distant and he _did_ understand.

            _It will end here after all. After this wish Midoriko will go away. Kagome will go back to her time with no way of ever coming back. Sango and Miroku will still be dead and I will be alone. Even after everything, it will end this way._

            And Kagome whispered against his chest, gently, "I want you to be happy."

            Looking down at her, his vision blurring as tears rose in his eyes, he lifted a hand to her face sorrowfully, trailing his fingers across her skin and marveling how, after everything that had happened, she was still both breathtaking yet painful to touch. As the blood stained his own fingertips, he closed his eyes, searching his thoughts for a wish, one simple yet powerful wish. And he couldn't find one that would ever make him fully happy. Not one.

            And so, he opened his eyes to look at Midoriko and the Priestess understood. Wordlessly, she straightened and backed away and Inuyasha lifted Kagome's face to his, his fingers pushing aside her hair as he said, "You're going home, Kagome. And you'll be ok, now. There won't be any more pain or worry. No reason to come back."

            She listened to him silently, her eyes flickering under her closed eyelids and as he stared at her he felt his tears fall, felt a pain inside that he couldn't have described. Straining against the need to sob openly he pulled her close to him, pressing a kiss to her forehead desperately.

            "I _will_ see you one day…" he whispered against her skin.

            And Midoriko lifted her hands to the sky, Kagome's body coming loose from Inuyasha's arms and floating upward gently, hovering silently. The Tetsusaiga shrank once more, sliding loose of Kagome's figure and falling to the ground soundlessly. Inuyasha gazed at them both, his shoulders heaving and he no longer fought the tears that overwhelmed him. He watched as Kagome's form became transparent, as it faded from sight and he felt inside that she truly was gone, that she would never again step foot in his time. And he closed his eyes and hunched forward, lifting a trembling hand to his eyes as he finally _understood._

            "Inuyasha," Midoriko said to him and he felt her hand on his shoulder. He didn't raise his eyes to her but he felt it when she pressed the jewel into his palm, felt her when she kneeled beside him.

            "Make your wish, Inuyasha," she whispered against his ear, "and set us all free."

            Inuyasha nodded imperceptibly, his fingers closing around the jewel and with a deep breath he made a wish into the night, speaking it with his heart but never aloud. It worked the same and Midoriko lifted his head then, smiling beautifully into his face and as he gazed at her she became transparent, fading into the night as well.

            _"Arigato, Inuyasha…"_

            He watched as she vanished, as he was left alone. And he sat there, upon the hill, surrounded on all sides by those he had held dear, merely floating in nothingness. The numbness did not fade away, nor did he rise to leave. He remained there, lost in time, lost in confusion and pained heartache and when Kirara awoke he barely acknowledged the feline, only to lean against the creature's soft belly and wait.

            And when the sun peeked over the horizon and the morning came, he did not become demon again.

Ok so I'm not even going to SAY anything. I'm only going to say that there IS an epilogue after this, that yes, this chapter actually DID happen and that if you guys decide to kill me just remember that if you do, I can't put out the epilogue. =) My thanks to:

Kaoru Wolf: Wow, five times?? LMAO. Well this chapter right here is maaaaaad long so you might need to reread just to get everything that just went down!

Va13361: So are you going to kill me now..?

Hope and Harmony: Erm…*runs shrieking* There is an epilogue!!

Iseult: Damn straight the battle happened in the middle of the night! I needed to show both of Inuyasha's sides at some point so why not leave it til the end when I could show both??

Momo-chan: So is Peachgirl good then? I can always get into new anime!

Kinoko: Were you expecting her to be as bad as this? Kagome, I mean… =)

KayJuli: Did I answer all the questions you left in your last review?? ;)

Raijin-san: Ah, Miroku and Sango. Yeah, they definitely know now… love is a fickle thing. ***Sob***

Nekochan614: Was it really hard to follow?? Do you understand everything that went down? If you don't please ask me and I'll explain.

Leena: Yes, the battle started and is now done. Now there's the epilogue which just might have a happy ending.

Kainu1329: This was the fastest I was able to update! You people have me barely sleeping, LMAO!

Vold: Well, this chapter didn't have a happy ending but the story itself might… =D

Saro: Did you like my "Hamlet-style high death count tragedy" to quote you? LMAO! You know I couldn't let it be a whole, "I love you!" "Yeah, I love you, too," thing!

Anyways, man I am soooo damn tired. This was one long-ass chapter and I'm beat. I hope I still have readers after this… =)

-Cassandra


	22. See Only Me

_See Only Me:_

            He was old, so painfully old. His dark hair had returned to its original silver color but only because of age. He had long since given up his past, given up the wild side of himself and he gazed out into the morning sun feebly. Years had passed, making him older, making him wiser. And he still saw visions of a young girl with long dark hair and cheerful dark eyes. He still saw visions of a wandering monk and the tragic face of a girl who had lost too much too quickly. And sometimes he saw the face of another young woman, only her eyes were sorrowful. And when that face faded away it was replaced with the face of another woman, another one who had passed on, who had lived such a lonely life apart from the one she had loved. And he understood what it was to love someone and to be apart. To spend a lifetime waiting to die just to move on. He understood. And he was ready in the end. After such a long life, he was ready.

            He brought his eyes away from the morning sun and he looked down to his sword, still resting against his shoulder. All these years and he had never grown used to sleeping any other way except sitting up, his sword at his side. He ran his hand over the blade slowly, gently, and he wondered for a moment what would happen to it when he passed. Who would claim it in his name? Who would wield it?

            At his side came a small sound and he looked up absentmindedly, meeting the eyes of a young-looking male with red hair. The boy stood silently, merely resting against the wall beside him and he managed a small smile for him, bowing his head once more.

            "It won't be long now, will it?" the boy asked him quietly.

            He didn't respond for a long time, merely running his wizened hand over the blade. Up and down, up and down. And as the sun was reflected in the blade's flat surface he said softly, "It's been too long as it is."

            The red-haired boy did not reply to that, his head bowing. And they both listened to the morning, the birds that chirped, the crickets that moved. The breeze as it played with the trees. They heard it all and it was as it had once been, so long before. Closing his eyes momentarily, the boy's fox tail twitched and he sighed, remembering. Remembering it still.

            "Will you tell her I miss her?" he asked the older man quietly.

            The man nodded faintly, also closing his eyes as he leaned his head back against the wall. And he saw her face still, heard her laugh and saw her become impatient with him, screaming for him to sit. He would have allowed her to sit him always had it just worked out. If it still had the chance of working out. All these years would mean nothing, would just as soon be forgotten along with the sorrow and the heartache if he could see her and stay at her side. All would be well again.

            The boy smiled faintly, lifting his eyes to the sun and he murmured, "Tell her I miss her ramen. And I miss her love." And he looked down at the old man but the old man did not respond and did not acknowledge his words. His face saddening, the boy knelt beside the old man to gaze at him and he seemed to sleep almost, his face peaceful. The boy hesitated, merely staring at the old man and then, tentatively he reached out to pass a hand over the man's shoulder, to rest upon the flat of the Tetsusaiga.

            "Better yet, I'll tell her myself one day," he murmured. 

            When you find your one true love, do you know? Do you automatically just know? 

            She didn't know why but she always dreamt of a young man with silver hair and amber eyes. And dog ears. It was very strange, to say the least, but when she thought of him her heart seemed to sing and hurt at the same time. And he never really smiled which made her want to _make_ him smile. And sometimes, when he annoyed her enough, all she had to do was scream at him to sit down and he actually _did_. Sure, he would hit the ground pretty hard and when she stood up he was _always_ angry at her, but she loved him still and deep inside she knew he loved her. 

            So…did one automatically just know?

            "Kagome!"

            Her mother's voice came up the stairwell and she checked her clock once more. Late for class _again._ Why did this always somehow happen to her? She threw the remainder of her books on her bed as she searched for her backpack frantically. "I'm coming! I'm almost done!"

            There, under her desk. She snatched up the backpack, unzipping it. Reaching out for her books she began to shove them in. And at the bottom of her bag gleamed something white. With a small frown she reached in and pulled it out slowly.

            A long, silver strand of hair.

            She had half a mind to squeak and check her hair quickly for more offending gray hairs. But instead she merely gazed at the single strand, her lips parting. It wasn't one of hers. It couldn't belong to anyone she knew either, not at that length. Slowly, she set it aside, staring at it for another moment as it gleamed on her desktop. 

            _He always has silver hair…_

            She looked away, turning her attention back to the matter at hand. She was running late. She would be late for class again. She always figured college would be different from high school but no, it seemed any kind of class or institution of higher learning would have the same effect on her. She would always be late and always be absent no matter how much she fought against it. It was almost _sad._

            _"It is my choice. My decision..."_

            She shoved the rest of her books into her backpack, those same words running through her head as she worked, as she zipped up the bag.

            _"I want you to have control of the Shikon no Tama. I want you to make your wish."_

            She had been hearing those words in her head for a little over a year now. She didn't know exactly when those words had come to her, didn't remember ever saying them but they brought her comfort. Everything was a choice after all, wasn't it?

            _"I want you to be happy…"_

            She loved those small phrases, even though she had no idea what a Shikon no Tama was. She paused, looking down at her backpack. And slowly, she felt her eyes get dragged over to the silver hair once more. It shimmered delicately in the morning sunlight. And she felt the comfort once more, a familiar longing.

            And the small voice in her head told her that today was going to be a different day, a better day. Today her life would take a turn for the better, that she would know it when she saw it, when she saw _him._

            "Kagome!"

            With a gasp she brought herself back, flinging the backpack onto her back and dashing out of the room.

            "Your lunch! Your lunch!" her mother called out after her and she waved a small tray at her as she rushed by.

            "Oh! You know you don't have to do this anymore, mom," she said to the older woman but she stopped to smile and give the woman a peck on the cheek as she took the lunch. "But thanks!" And she raced off, stopping only to pull on her shoes and then dash out. Her bike waited beside her grandfather, the old man looking off toward the small shrine house. Towards the well. She paused, slowing, and looked over as well, beginning to frown. "Grandpa?" she asked faintly.

            "There was a small shift today…" the old man murmured and he tossed an impish look at his grand-daughter. "I feel great power…"

            Kagome managed to control the twitching eyebrow. "Do you?"

            The old man nodded and he backed away from the bike. "A great power…"

            She trusted his musings as much as his lies. With a sigh and another peck, this time to the old man's cheek, she climbed onto her bike. "If you happen to see a little girl climb out of the well it's because you didn't make a copy of the video," she threw over her shoulder.

            "And we hired someone to take care of the shrine," the old man said, his voice lightening. "I'm getting old, too old to do it myself…" and it sounded suspiciously like a whine.

            "You hired someone?" she asked him, turning to look at him. "Mom and I could have handled it. Even Souta-"

            "He's there, under the tree," the old man continued, motioning. She glanced in the direction he pointed and he mumbled, "He's a lazy one, though…"

            A young man leaned against her favorite tree.

            _My tree…_

            His hair was long and dark, falling down his back and his face was seemingly not amused. In fact, he looked downright impatient, merely leaning there, his arms crossed over his chest.

            _The arrow…_

            He wore the red and white uniform of the shrine, long red pants and a white haori. He also wore what seemed to be a heavy chain around his neck, a beaded necklace, and he looked like he was in one of the foulest moods imaginable. She hesitated, staring at him.

            _The past…_

            The boy yawned, stretching out his arms lazily and then he scratched at his ear with a cupped hand, the way a dog would.

            "He's very familiar, strangely enough," her grandfather said and he sounded distant, lost under the sound of rushing air. Kagome blinked, dismounting from her bike and she couldn't remember. She couldn't remember where she had seen him before.

            "His name is-"

            "I know his name," she whispered instantly even though she didn't and she found herself moving, no longer in control. He was so familiar, so familiar…

            The boy caught sight of her then as she neared and he straightened, gazing at her with slightly widened eyes. And that clinched it. She knew him from such a long time ago. A long, long time ago…

            As she came to stand before him he studied her, his lips parting. She returned the gaze, her own jaw falling open even though no words came out.

"Do you know who I am?" he asked her, his voice rough and yet gentle.

            She stared at him as his dark hair blew around his face and she was taken aback at how familiar he was, stunned to see that he had brilliant amber eyes that glowed in the morning sunlight. He seemed like the kind to have dark eyes to go with his dark hair but the amber eyes were gorgeous nonetheless. But she couldn't…remember. She couldn't remember him, no matter how much she tried to.

            "I'm sorry…" she whispered, shaking her head slowly. "I can't…place you…"

            "It's fine," he said to her quickly, and he smiled, a mischievous grin that made her shiver and glow all at once. "We can start fresh. As if we've never met before."

            Kagome agreed slowly, nodding at him. "All right…"

            And he nodded as well, his smile slowly fading. Tentatively, he reached out and took her hand, bringing her closer and she went a step, her eyes widening as he looked down at her. His lips parted to speak, and he was hesitant, as if he didn't know exactly what to say and she waited for him, frowning faintly.

            "I _see _you, Kagome," he whispered to her, his amber eyes serious. "I see only you."

            And at his words she suddenly knew his name, remembered his face as it had once been. The silver hair on her desktop, shimmering in the morning sun. And she didn't know how she knew him, only that she had been in love with him once and now that she had seen his face once more she had missed it achingly. 

            "Inuyasha…" she murmured.

            His amber eyes widened as she said his name, as she lifted both hands to his face to hold it gently, her fingers cupping his jaw and running over his skin, his very human ears.

            "I wished for it," he said to her, his face blurring as tears suddenly rose in her eyes. Alarm entered his expression, sadness, and he said again softly, "I wished for it, wished for you. For myself. For everyone. And the jewel ceased to exist when I did. When I made my choice-"

            _"It is my choice. My decision…"_

            "I wished for humanity, for you. And I died a long time ago, without you. But I was allowed to come back to be with you."

            Kagome nodded, her tears falling free.

            "And…here I am."

            _Here you are._

            Kagome nodded once more and slowly closed the space between them, burying her face in his shoulder. He smelled like the wild. Trees, soil and earth. The past. And the scent surrounded her as he embraced her tightly, as if he was afraid to ever let go again.

            _See only me._

            "Hey, you lazy kid! Get your hands off my granddaughter!" 

            Inuyasha hesitated, his frame falling wearily. "He's been yelling at me for a while now," he growled under his breath.

            Kagome's voice came muffled and still thick with tears. "Have you been slacking off?"

            He snorted indignantly and then paused in thought. "Keh. Maybe a little."

            "I don't pay you to stand around and fondle my granddaughter-"

            "You haven't paid me for anything!" Inuyasha barked back over Kagome's head. "Besides…" and his voice dropped mischievously, "I'd fondle your granddaughter for free…"

            Kagome burst out laughing into his shoulder.

            "I didn't come alone," he said to her after another moment and she lifted her head then, meeting his amber gaze questioningly.

            "Who did you bring?"

            Inuyasha glanced around, his expression becoming bored. "They're around. I'm surprised you haven't run into them-"

            "Stop asking every girl!" came an angry feminine voice and Kagome whirled in time to see a darting figure sneak out the front door of her house, followed by a breathless girl. "That's Kagome's mother! She already has two children! She doesn't have to bear you _anything!_"

            The first figure paused, turning to the heaving girl in a rather sudden movement. "Then, Sango, will _you-"_

            "Don't even think about it," came the flat reply.

            Kagome whirled to face Inuyasha once more, her eyes widening in disbelief.

            "I came across them a few months ago," he said with a shrug. "And they were _still_ fighting…"

            And also from the house came a small child with red hair, following Souta as he poked his head out quizzically at the fighting couple. Kagome stared, a hand lifting to her mouth in utter incredulity. 

            "They're all here…how-"

            Inuyasha was smiling faintly as she looked at him, his amber eyes trained on the group, ignoring the angry shouts that erupted between the first two figures. "I couldn't make one perfect wish so I ended up making a _long_ one instead. One that involved a lot of 'ands'," he explained and Kagome stared at him in confusion. He glanced at her. "Don't ask."

            Kagome nodded, looking back toward the group as a third head joined the redhead and her brother, his eyes trained on the very angry girl still screaming at the first figure. 

            "Um, Sango-"

            "Kohaku, get back in the house," the girl growled and she was rolling up the sleeves of her shirt, advancing on the man smiling uncomfortably before her. "This is about to get ugly…"

            "Sango," the man said in a calming tone, "I wouldn't be asking half the women I do if _you_ would just agree-"

            "I _did_ agree. Which is why I'm seeing you. Which is why you're still _alive,"_ she said, still in a threatening tone. And she squeaked in surprise as the man suddenly swept her into his embrace, planting a kiss firmly on her mouth. 

            "There. See? There is more than one way to keep you quiet-"

            And he broke off as she smacked him upside the head, her eyebrow twitching.

            "Eww, cooties," the small red-haired boy said in distaste.

            Kagome gazed wordlessly, her heart nearly filled to breaking with happiness. Behind her Inuyasha shifted, his arms still tight around her. "A long time passed without you," he said quietly and she turned to look at him once more. His amber eyes were a bit sad as he stared at the group, their bickering fading away into the background. "I lived a long human life and I was alone. I didn't fall in love again in my entire human lifetime and I always searched the face of every woman I encountered, thinking maybe, somehow, I'd see your face there. But you never came back and I was never allowed to come into your time again. So I had to wait years for this one moment in time."

            Kagome returned his stare as he looked down at her. "Was it worth it? The long wait?" she asked him quietly.

            He hesitated thoughtfully and she had half a mind to whack him off the head. But then, in a serious tone he replied, "You're worth that and more."

            She smiled brilliantly. "Good answer."

            "Had a nice long life to think that one up," he let her know. And he sighed, his arms tightening around her once more. "So, now that I've found you and we're all together once more, what should we do?"

            "I'll tell you what _you_ should do, you lazy-" came Kagome's grandfather's voice once more.

            _"I_ have class today," she said to him, cutting off her grandfather, who mumbled under his breath and wandered back toward the house. She lifted her head to gaze at Inuyasha, her eyes dropping to his lips. "But I'll be back tonight if you want to…talk."

            Inuyasha gazed at her. "Talk," he stated as if he didn't believe her.

            "Hey, you kids, get off my front porch!"

            "Gomen nasai, Kagome's Grandfather," came Miroku's apologetic tone followed by the sharp sound of a slap.

            "Stop _grabbing_ me there!"

            "Ouch…"

            "You don't want to talk?" Kagome asked him, her eyes widening slightly.

            Inuyasha thought it over, glancing up once more and staring absentmindedly as Sango growled and ran after Miroku, the boy laughing and ducking her flying hand. "I think we have more than enough time to talk. I _think_ there are better things for us to do with our time…"

            Kagome smiled mischievously. "Like what?" she asked slowly.

            "Like _eating!_ Man, I'm _starved…"_

            Kagome felt the sweat drop slide down her head. "That's…great. You eat while I go to class-" and she went to slip out of his arms but he dragged her back with a smile, finally kissing her gently. She paused, taken off guard and then she sighed into the kiss, her arms lifting and winding around his neck.

            "Eww…_more_ cooties…" whispered Shippo from close by.

            "Mmm," Inuyasha murmured against her mouth. "If cooties taste like this…"

            Kagome burst into laughter once more, turning her face away. "All these years and you still haven't grown up," she quipped. And she paused, gazing at him silently for a long moment. He returned her gaze for as long as he dared before finally bowing his head and turning faintly crimson.

            "What?"

            She smiled at him gently. "You don't know what you have until it's gone. And you don't know what you've missed until you find it again." And that summed it up between them both. 

            Inuyasha nodded silently. And he took her hand in his, squeezing it. "Go to class. I'll be here when you get back," he murmured, dipping into her once more for another small kiss.

            _Yes, you will be._

            Kagome's smile widened and she also nodded, finally pulling free and still it took a moment for their hands to separate as she floated away.

            _And you see only me. Finally._

            She turned to look toward Sango and the girl waved at her, shrieking, "Kagome-chan!" as Miroku literally swept her off her feet and swung her around. And Shippo also waved, hopping a bit and joining Miroku, Kohaku behind him in the same school uniform as Souta. And she felt herself exhale at last, lifting her gaze to the sky and breathing deeply into herself.

            Today would be a good day. And she paused thoughtfully. No. Today would be the best day. And she smiled brilliantly at the blue sky.

Pray, I don't know if it's sacred or not,  
You say that we can fall apart at anytime,  
Breathe for the whole world we can't fight,  
They starve for the love that we supply  
  


These are the fallen souls.

                        _~ Fallen Souls – Ours ~___

                                                                                                ~ FIN ~

Alright then, let's see if I still have fans. Yes, this _was_ a very sappy ending but I figure after how _dark_ this fic was, they deserve some kind of happiness, ne? Anyways, I hope all questions were answered and all fears and death threats were put to rest. =) Now we go on to all the thanks and all that other happy stuff, LOL. This is going to drag out…

Ok, definitely for the following people because they caught on fairly early and were very, _very_ kind with their reviews:

Iseult: I'm hoping this fic lived up to what you wanted although maybe not what you were expecting, LOL. Thanks very much for making me laugh, making me shriek and making me want to write. And thanks for always reading. Although I'm a bit upset that you foresaw the deaths of Miroku and Sango. Does this mean I'm predictable..? Man, that sucks. And thanks for complimenting me on my…balls. ROTFLMAO! And yeah, Midoriko and Shiki. Who'd have thunk it, LMAO!

Hope and Harmony: To you for cracking me up and…threatening me, sure. What the hell, right? What a good review without a few words of…doom and destruction…don't get over the Asian guys because I like them too much and misery loves company. =D

Quickening: I haven't had much of a chance to see if you've done anything new, too busy trying to finish up this fic but definitely, definitely keep writing. You made me want to keep writing just because I loved the way you carried your fic! People like you, who can manage to keep characters' personalities down and work them to make them your own are talented and should always do what they love!

KayJuli: Of _course_ I did that! I _had_ to do that! We couldn't have such a happy ending between the two! _Someone _needed to die!But you got it right on the nose, babe! Inuyasha does end up living his life out alone and as a human and he does end up meeting up with her in the future. I wasn't joking in the fic when he made a nice long wish. It probably sounded something like, "I wish to become human and to see Kagome again and to see Miroku and Sango again when I'm reincarnated and…" LOL. Damn, I really _am_ that predictable… ***Glares at Iseult*** But hey, as long as you liked the story, I'm deliriously happy, LOL! ;)

KMF: Because you were the first to review and because you were there until the very end, my hat is off to you. If you like a fic, always review. It will always make the writer feel good!

BronteJD: ***Hands over a glass of water*** For the lump in your throat… =(  But yes, a happy ending, I am at your service! Hee-hee, careful though, Ain't Afraid to Die is also going to have some twists and turns before any of them have a happy ending too… but in all seriousness, thanks for reading. Really. You always reviewed, always had nice words and always hung on. I hope you do the same for my other fics. =)

Cataluna: For reviewing and for being part of the club, LOL! I'm really happy you're following me into CB because it will convince me to keep writing. Thank you for reviewing always and I hope you stay close, you're too cool to drop!

Aldrean Treu Peri: I see your name a lot these days, LOL! And I still have a hard time spelling it, it's very sad. But because I fins your name familiar, I also know you reviewed a lot so thank you for that! And I hope you decide to keep reading Ain't Afraid to Die because that one might start being not as dark but just as heavy as Fallen Souls. =) Also, I downloaded Angie by Rolling Stones because of you, LMAO!

And now for all the following people for reading, for making me laugh, making me realize mistakes and making this whole process worthwhile:

VA13361: Wishful thinking is the only thing that saved you, mwa-hah-hah… ok, well in all truthfulness, I knew the epilogue would be a happy ending, just didn't realize how _mushy_ it would be. But hey, a happy ending, right?! I hope you weren't depressed for long but thanks you for reading and reviewing for as long as you did. =)

Ithilwen: Yeah, I left Shippo. I never forgot he was alive but for me, Shippo was never really a huge part of the anime, not the way the others were. And I think somewhere deep inside it would have just been _wrong_ to kill off Shippo so I wasn't about to do that to _anyone._ But hey, Shippo grew up and stayed by Inuyasha's side. =) Anyways, I'm hoping it was a good ending. It made me smile as I wrote it. =) Thanks!

Riaka: I'm sorry you read the story three times, LMAO! But at the same time, I'm happy you did! Just goes to show me that people just might sit down one day and read the whole thing over from the beginning. I do know Faye Wong (For a long time FFVIII was an obsession of mine. I think at one point all the FF games were obsessions of mine…) but I've never heard the song. I may have to download it now, LOL. Thank you for reading (three times) and for reviewing!

KiTtEn: Holy crap, did I get the name right?? And yeah, I got the whole "damn!" thing, LMAO! Does this mean you liked the fic??

Aurora Earth: I like to think that Inuyasha ended up becoming a useful member of society (ok, or maybe just Kaede's village) up until her death and then, with Shippo and Kirara at his side he wandered around a bit, worked out whatever problems he had left (Sesshoumaru, Kouga, etc) before finally returning to the village an old man and dying. He made his wish after all. So yeah, that's what I think. =) It would have given him a worldly wisdom, LOL.

Poppy: I'm sorry it didn't end the way you thought it would but there was no way I was going to get Sesshoumaru to really revive Sango and Miroku. For one, I spoke to the guy and he was like, "No, no way, you insignificant mortal," so I didn't take kindly to that which is why in a hidden chapter, I as author, killed him off too. Ok, that's a complete fabrication but if Sesshoumaru could never get along with his little sibling in the long years they lived before there was no way he would get along with a complete mortal afterwards. So that's why I like to think that Inuyasha at least tried to fix problems between himself and his older brother. I wouldn't mind exploring the relationship between Sesshoumaru and Rin after the complete massacre that was this story, though. I just might try my hand at that. Something about Fluffy makes me all warm and squishy inside… ;) Thanks for asking though, LOL!

Jezunya: ROTLMAO! "At least an 'I lovED you.'" ROTFLMAOOOOOO!! Noooo, that was just too damn funny to me… I actually considered making one of those little chapters that can only be viewed on my site. I haven't actually ruled it out, either. Then again I kinda wanted one for Sango and Miroku as well after they were killed off. Maybe I will do one, though. Keep your eye on the site, I just might do it now… =) If anything, I'll post a bit of it on Fanfiction.net and then be like, "Go to the site to finish it!" LOL, thanks for pushing for the idea! So yeah, I did kinda gag on all the sugary-sweet feelings in the epilogue but I think they deserve happiness after everything I did to them. =) And Eien meant Eternity. LOL, thanks for reading, babe!

Momo-chan: ***Pauses for a moment*** Uh, you ok there? You sorta rambled in your last review and I was just wondering if I had traumatized you… LOL! So did you like the epilogue at all? Better yet, if you're going to confuse me entirely mebbe you shouldn't answer that question, LMAO! Thank you for reading!

Hosi-ni-onegai: Did you really cry?? I am so _happy!_ It means you got totally into the fic, I'm freaking happy! LOL. But wait…are you still crying? C'mon! The epilogue practically gave me cavities!

Raijin-san:  Sugoi!! I took a Cowboy Bebop quiz to see what my song was and it was Goodnight Julia, LMAO! So I ended up downloading it to hear it and it was totally such a kewl little theme! I'm so happy you cried like a…little….biotch. Really, I…am. Did you really? LMAO! Cowboy Bebop fans unite! Now you make me want to go update Ain't Afraid to Die.

Saro: Ø_Ø Damn girl, you wanted _everyone_ dead, didn't you?? Yeah, so did I but I needed Inuyasha to go through some more angst before I killed him off. I can just see Kirara being the only one left to tell the story. ***Bunch of growls and purrs*** Shippo: Speak up, Kirara, I can't understand you… LMAO. But hey, at least I tried to end it happy. Should I have left it a sad ending?

AutumnFire: ***Humbly picks up the eyeballs and hands them back to the owner before handing over the Prozac*** I'm kidding! See, it was a happy ending!! Really, it was! Don't kill me! And yeah, I felt your pain about typos. I try not to make many of them but sometimes the little buggers get through. Did I really depress you every time I sent out a chapter? OMG, LMAO! I'm so sorry! But happy ending, happy ending! =)

Kinoko: LMAO, no I don't think I'll be making a sequel to this. I think I've grown passed Inuyasha. My current obsession is Cowboy Bebop and once that's done who knows what it will be but I won't mind taking a few trips back to Inuyasha to make one-shots. Another long, angsty fic like this just might kill me. And yes, I will stop by and read your fic, kewl? LMAO, thanks for reading!

IcyRayven:  I've gotten so much exercise trying to beat off those people who wanted to kill me. I'm in better shape now than I have been in years, LOL! But here it was, the only happy chapter in the entire story! Woo-hoo! I hope you liked it and didn't die from the sappiness!

Amie: LOL, still crying? But it was a happy ending! Really, it was! Until I decide to reconstruct the Shikon no Tama and resurrect Shiki and…oh, oops, too much info! ;) Thank you for reading!

Yani Cardaria: Ok, put the sword down. It was a happy epilogue, put the sword down. No, really, put the- ***Realizes she isn't putting the sword down*** Aww, man… LOL! :)

Vold: Yeah, when I originally thought of making this fic I was like, "It would be cool to have Midoriko play a part. And to be in love." I mean, sure, she was this rocking Priestess and all, but I didn't want to think of her as untouchable either. So why not _make_ her untouchable but through no fault of her own? So of course to have her in love with the main villain was just heartbreaking to me. And just the way I would have wanted it! I'm so into angst, you would not believe. Or actually, after reading this entire fic, mebbe you _would_ believe. ;) I hope you liked the whole thing!

Leena: D'oh! LMAO! I can just see you being like, "Oh, Inuyasha will live into Kagome's time…except that he's _human_ now!! Nooooooooo!" LMAO! Sorry but a lifetime alone is enough for anyone. Inuyasha didn't need lifetimes (plural) to be alone. That would have just been mean…Yeah, this coming from a chick who just killed off half the team, LMAO! And besides, I didn't want to bring back Sango and Miroku. I firmly believe that before their respective ends, they accomplished (or had the things accomplished for them) everything they had originally set out to do. Miroku did save himself from the Kazaana, ending the curse, but he could not save himself from his death at Kagome's hands. He lived only long enough to see to it that someone was left with a fighting chance. And then he went to be with Sango. Just because he and Sango died, it's not to say that they were separated in death. They do return later together to be with Inuyasha and Kagome. And Sango went to see about Kohaku and once Kohaku was killed there was no reason for her to go on. She had failed in the end and I like to think she knew that the battle would not end the best way. But it didn't stop her from finally letting Miroku know how she felt for him for so long. And in that I like to think she didn't ultimately fail in battle. Which is why Inuyasha didn't bring them back. It was over for them and they had worked so hard for so long, they deserved some kind of peace. What would be the point bringing back two characters if they would all only mourn the past? It was hard enough for Inuyasha, I would like to believe that he wouldn't want to put anyone through what he was feeling, much less two people who had taken so much pain as it was. So, yeah. Damn, was that really just…psychological or what? LMAO! Anyways, I hope that gave you something to think about (and why did that sentence come out sounding like I'm scolding you?? Geez, I'm not, I swear!). Lord knows I thought all these things while writing this and I knew it would be a _huge_ thing to try to write but I also hoped people would see to the core of it all and understand that this was going to be a painful story. Well, this was a huge note, sorry but thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed it!

Hikaru Li: Yooooo, have you ever read The Separate Existence? It was another story I wrote, (for Cardcaptor Sakura, it's under my profile) just as angsty as this one but nowhere near as long and one of the main characters in the second world is called Hikaru! I like the fact that you used Li as her last name but you might have to read the story to understand the reason _why_ that is. I'm not about to give it away. =)

Kainu1329: Man, I _am_ that predictable! Eeek, now I'm going to have to rewrite the entire epilogue and keep them apart! Ok, maybe not but did I scare you?? Hee…

Nhyemia: Man, that was really nice of you to say! I'm just happy I had such an effect on you because we all know that this couple have something really special between them and it couldn't always go smoothly. I so wanted it to go out with a bang and this story, while it didn't come together in one day, definitely did have me thinking long and hard, LOL. But that's a good thing. When something makes me think, it sorta makes me want to succeed as well which is how this story was done. Eeeeeh, I'm so happy you liked it!! LOL, thank you so much!

WickedWolf: Holy _shit!_ Man, and I _always_ try to make sure I don't make mistakes like that, especially between ground and floor. You would _not_ believe how much I am stressing that mistake! There are a lot of things I try to always correct, like not using the same word in the same sentence to describe something (Ex: Inuyasha raised his arms, lifting the Tetsusaiga into the air) or in the sentences immediately following the first sentence, stuff like that. And the difference between floor and ground is up there in No-no's so the fact that that one slipped by…grrr. But thanks for noticing, really!

SimplyTurquoise: Yep yep! Had to go through angst before they could be together happily. =) Don't worry, I don't lie to readers. If I say the story is going to be angsty, prepare for angst. But if I say it's going to have a happy ending then rest assured there will be a happy ending! Now be prepared for more death and violence, mwa-hah-hah- oh, all right, I'm kidding. =)

ShadiyaRay: You know, looking at your name, I have a character in an original fiction piece that I've been writing for years, whose name is sorta like yours. I have _never_ noticed that until now! Anyways, LMAO, thank you for the compliments and yes, happy ending, happy ending! I hope it's happy enough for you and everyone else, I was dying of the sugary sap… =)

Taltos: Hee hee. Usually when I upload to Fanfiction.net, I save the chapter I'm uploading as an html document in Microsoft Word and then upload that. It comes up with italics and all. I'm not sure if that helped you at all…

SylverAngel: I'm so happy you dug the Miroku-Sango ending! Everyone else is kinda like, "OMG, Inuyasha _lived!"_ LMAO! I couldn't just leave Sango and Miroku like that, together but separated. It would have been so sad. =) But thanks for reading and for liking the story! LMAO!

Nqhi: Alive…alien word. Does not compute. Please try again later. =) I'm kidding! Yes, alive! Everyone will be alive! Shoot, you _ppl!!_ I should have warned you all that that I love killing off characters. Makes the story that much harder to take and that much harder to let go of. =) So did you like it? LOL!

And now, last but not ever least, for all the other readers who reviewed in passed chapters and who have been reading for sooo long. My thanks go out to: Ookami-chan (Ookami-sama, LOL), Kaoru Wolf, Nekochan614, Nozomi, Pink Straw, Jenna, Lulu, Utsukushi (that means Beautiful in Japanese, right?), Alex, Phoebi, Silvermoon Maru (I've seen your name a lot too, reviewing, so thank you!), Nekoi, DracOnyx, Dunken, Chibionna (Small Woman..? Is that right?), Tidus, Icy Discordia, Stormrunner, someone who only referred to their self as Person (LMAO), Red, AliQua, Lachesis, Tsukinoko, Mikoyru Kaniu, Merith, Tessa, AoiHyou, Demonic Little Sister (Hmm…I have one of those…LOL), someone who left a review called ^-^ LMAO, Tony, DiaBlo, Clow Angel, NightChild0101, Jammincat9, Lil Washu, Kookie, Laura-chan, Marean Beast, Chibi Makoto, Lizzie, D.J., KenYasha, Nassau, Sammi-chan, Sorena, Tonz82, Obsession171, Kurotenshi (Black Angel, I like…), Rain, Libra, Rio, Demonblade, Peek, Lord Cirenmas, Angel7669, Meamiko, KharmaSmack, Mara-chan, Shin-chan, Demon_chan, Zel no Miko, and Inaho. A lot of names are familiar because lots of you guys left numerous reviews and I just wanted to say thank you one last time. You guys make writing and sharing stories totally worth it! If I left anyone out, I apologize from the bottom of my heart!

Ok, that's about  it, LMAO! Like that's not enough. But anyways, the other stories under my profile are also angsty (it's all I write, can't write anything else, LMAO). I'm now doing a Cowboy Bebop fic, Ain't Afraid to Die, and that's going to be angsty too but hopefully I'll be able to keep the characters in character and still be angsty. =) Anyways, for my thoughts on everything that happened with this fic, just read my note to Leena, it's up above a bit and …that's it! I'm signing off! 

Take care people, and thank you from the bottom of my heart!

-Cassandra    *listening to Eric Clapton and BBKing's _Hold On I'm Coming_ to get into the mood to write some Cowboy Bebop!*


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